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#depressionrecovery

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i think this is one of the strongest scenes in his movie. it doesnt matter what you thought of this movie wether you liked it or you hated it wether you thought it was a good portrayal of anorexia or if you think the movie glamorized eating disorders. it doesnt even matter if youve seen this movie. this scene was strong and it showed the differences in the thoughts of the person who suffers from anorexia and the people who watch them suffer and want to help them but cant because they themselves dont understand the disorder. heres whats happening in the scene: elis stepmother susan has just finished weighing eli and after being shocked by the number on the scale she tells eli to turn around and face her and snaps a picture of elis body. she then shows this picture to eli and asks her "do you think thats beautiful?" eli looks at the picture and very clearly and decisively says "no" then looks away. but heres the thing; susan doesnt think its beautiful because she sees too skinny, emaciated, starving, sick, dying. she shows eli the photo hoping that eli will see it too and have an epithany about what shes doing to herself. eli on the other hand sees everything she perceives as wrong, all the things shes ever seen as ugly and bad about herself. she sees insecurities, probably parts of her body that to her eyes are still FAT. so she answers honestly. no she doesnt think she's beautiful. but she doesn't blame this lack of beauty in herself on her eating disorder the way susan does. eli blames it on herself, on who she is, on her body and she turns to the promises that anorexia makes to fix it, and to make her beautiful. susan hopes that the pic and the question will make eli turn her back on anorexia, but what it really does is make her run toward it even more because anorexia promises to make you skinny and pretty and happy. when in truth it makes you miserable and sick. but when one is in the claws of this disorder the way eli is one often cant see that. susan got the answer she hoped to get and thinks that maybe she got through to eli a bit but because she really doesnt understand anorexia she doesnt realize that she may have actually made things worse instead...

Throwback to Tuesday at @stanglwirt -crazy this was only 2 days ago! ❄️ Usually I feel like time’s flying but this weeks seems sooo long already - and it’s only Thursday night... So much is happening and while I have to make sure that I’m not spreading myself too thin I also feel like with every day I’m feeling more and more positive changes within me. All this intense work on my mindset and the relationship with myself is paying off... Calm contentment where cold anxiety roared just a few weeks ago, inner peace where piercing pain had paralyzed me. Holding space for myself and all these emotions coming up through opening up old wounds, feeling, expressing, releasing, forgiving, reprogramming my mind with affirmations and visualizations, consciously creating this safe home within me, remembering, freeing, being. I’m grateful ♥️ How are you doing??? What’s on your mind this week? 💋 .
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📸 @lindaboese // #mentalhealthawareness #depressionrecovery #thoughtsbecomethings #wearecreators

Today was an amazing reminder that God is always in control no matter the situation. What ended up being a fun spirited YouTube collab about pageantry turned into hours of heartfelt conversation + deep girl talk. 🙏🏻So much love for this girl right here. ❤ @chhaviverg, you're truly a force to be reckoned with. ⚡️
(You can now watch our video on YouTube, link in bio! 🎥)
Also HUGE thanks to @theoriginalssalon & @gigisboutiqueridgewood for sponsoring us this afternoon, be sure to follow them on Instagram and check them out! 👏🏻 #missuniverse

I’ve been wading through a deep period of anxiety & depression this week, not sleeping, and feeling like I’ll never feel happy again. So I’m trying to find some bright happy things to focus on and just realized that we leave for Disneyland & Harry Potter in exactly 2 weeks from today!
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One of the best mechanisms I’ve found that helps me cope when darkness shows up is to find things in the future to look forward to. In the past, I often felt like I didn’t have anything worth living for in the future, so I’ve had to make strategic choices to always have something planned, big or small, down the pipeline. In this (rare) case, it’s a trip to California, but most of the time it’s something simple, like a creative project I want to accomplish or going to a movie.
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Everyone struggles with different things and the solution is never one-size-fits-all. For me, it’s having fun things to look forward to. For others, it’s quiet time or retail therapy. Whatever it is, the most important thing is that you find something that works for YOU and you make a plan to practice it.
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Also, if you have awesome self care practices, I’d love to hear them! I’m always looking for new ideas!

So I had my soccer game today, we lost 5-2 but it was BY FAR my favorite game! I played SO WELL! I don’t mean to sound cocky, that’s just not me, but when you compare to how unfit I have been due to anorexia I did BLOODY AMAZING! I chased down the ball, attacked the opposition with a determination I haven’t had in AGES, put in second and third efforts AND EVEN almost scored two goals!! 🙀 I don’t think the other team expected it and tbh neither did I!! 😹
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Also I spent the day with my gorgeous friend and got to spend a lot of time with my soccer crush 😸 so all in all it’s been a good day!! And tomorrow I’m off to leavers for four days!! I’m getting packed right now as we speak and double and triple checking that I don’t forget anything, buuuuuut knowing my forgetful self I probably will 🤷🏼‍♀️
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I didn’t get any photos of food to post since I was on the road and didn’t have time for pictures, so here’s my afternoon tea from a few days ago! @halotopcreamery mint chip 🍃🍪🍦 + two chocolate Santas 🍫🎅🏻
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I hope all you lovely people have had good days (in the LEAST maybe just alright, that’s still better than bad!) and I will be here for you all for whatever and whenever 😘❤️

Long time no speak - after being absent for a little over a week online 💖 I do hate talking about myself and my struggles as it leaves me vulnerable but also can create room for judgement (I'm still me just lost at times)
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To remove the stigma associated around mental health I have to speak up about it.
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For those of you who may not know I struggle with depression. Some days I can cope just fine and some weeks or a series of days I'm absent from life itself - it's not like I'm sad but for me I am emotionless and lost in my mind. In short I just sleep and keep to myself - usually during this time my sleep schedule is also out of whack I will be up all night and sleep all day.
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The thing about depression is you can't know or choose when it will take over and consume you. Sometimes it creeps up in short little bursts, but you can still function in your day to day life, other times you are paralysed and can't leave the house especially when paired with anxiety.
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Just writing this has taken a massive weight off of my shoulders as I have always felt even worse when I continue to push through life with a fake sense of happiness and a smile. We all deserve to be honest with ourselves, friends and family no matter what our struggles. We shouldn't feel the need to pretend to be happy all the time. Personally I find myself in a better headspace when I am open and honest. I hope by reading this all of you know how it's okay to be vulnerable at times and open up ❣️
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Thank you all so much for just being you and being here on this journey of mine - I am forever grateful for all the endless love and support 🖤

A letter to my body:

I am sorry for everything I have done to you. I am sorry for beating you down and abusing you. I am sorry for drowning you in alcohol. I am sorry for not stopping until I was almost to a point of death. I am sorry for denying you food for days on end just because I thought it would make me happier, it didn’t. I am sorry for harming you from head to toe, leaving behind marks that will forever be etched into you. I am sorry for filling your lungs with toxins and poison, damaging you forever. I am sorry for pushing you to a point of breaking, bringing you down so bad that you could barely function. I am sorry for bringing you so close to death. You deserve to be loved and cherish and I will work everyday to bring that to you. I almost broke you and killed you and I know I can never change that, but I will take care of you from now on. The scars will fade and you will heal. You will repair yourself and I promise to not hurt you like that anymore. I promise to eat so that you can gain muscle and energy. I promise to deal with my emotions in healthy manners instead of harming you. I promise to take care of you no matter what is thrown at you. I will love you endlessly.

Eine gute Freundin hat mal gesagt, man sieht es an meinen Klamotten, wie es mir geht. Ich war sehr überrascht, als sie das gesagt hat. Hätte nicht damit gerechnet, dass man das merkt. Ich liebe Klamotten, kombiniere gerne neue Outfits, bevorzuge Kombinationen, die etwas außergewöhnlich sind, nicht jeder an hat.
Wenn es mir nicht gut geht, ist mir leider selbst das zu viel. Etwas, was ich eigentlich gerne mache, womit ich mich gerne beschäftige. Dann wird es halt einfach mal nur ein einfacher Pulli mit schwarzer Hose. Nichts besonderes. #depressed #depressionrecovery #depression #svv #scars #survivor #ritzen #recovery #mentalhealth #mentalillness #borderline #ootd

MOST RECENT

Keep company with ONLY those....
who make you feel most ALIVE.

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Thanks Jordyn & Micah for this mornings LIVE workout !!!! 👊🏻
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☝🏻️These are a few of the people who I'm thankful to have in my life because they do that for me 🙌🏻
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Showing up, every day....especially on the weekend, to help make sure WE too are CONSTANTLY levelling up in our health, fitness, business and LIFE 👊🏻
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It also helps that they are MAJOR #CoupleGoals 💕
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Who makes YOU feel most alive?!
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#bodsquad
#tonedbody
#bodyacceptance
#PlantPowered
#MuscleMomma
#girlswithcurves
#VeganAthlete
#cleaneats
#veganrecipes
#veganmom
#MommaOfTwo
#SahmLife
#bethechange
#VeganEats
#veganbodybuilding
#selflovefirst
#anxietydisorder
#anxietyfree
#depressionwarrior
#depressionrecovery

FLUFF| November 18th 🌱”I am full of sugar and spice and everything so naughty it’s nice.”🌱 Extra chuffed. Thrift shopped this little meringue of an outfit £27. 💁 Thanks Holloway Rd! Absolute gem.⚡️Not into retail therapy but sometimes it does help. 🤫 With the queen herself @lauriee_fekecc
Barely could squeeze my bum into the shorts after a week of chocolate and coconut yoghurt extravaganza. Cacao/crackao and fatty fats surely work. 🤪
#happyhormones

To get in you must summit a proper application (fifth photo slide[also I misspelled *PTSD}) through my direct message after looking at the requirements and rules. As long as the requirements are met and rules are followed ANYONE can get in. *IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS COMMENT OR DM US* [Tags]: #depression #selfharm #emo #quotes #sad #scene #rock #darkness #black #photography #lonely #grunge #aesthetic #tumblr #loser #broken #dreamer #reality #alondrasreality #club #spreadlove #help #special #depressionhelp #depressionrecovery #anxietyhelp #mentalhealth #mentaldisorder

It was my first time making steel-cut oats this week. So, I made it fancy. 🥥🍓🌰There is something about the morning that is my favorite part of the day. ☕️ On weekends, I usually take my time and stay present with each moment while plans form themselves in my head. I think mornings are my favorite because of the feeling of having the whole day ahead. Then I go about my day, completing each objective. (Usually I get everything done.) A tinge of sadness creeps in around noon sometimes, especially in the winter months, but not always. Half of the day is gone by then. But I do my best to stay present, grateful, and active as the day shifts on. 🌥
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#comingfullspiral #wintermood #wintermornings #whatveganseat #vegansofig #vegansofinstagram #steelcutoats #veganbreakfast #seattlevegan #plantbased #plantbaseddiet #plantbasedfood #poweredbyplants #mindfulness #mindful #depressionrecovery #ptsdrecovery #staypresent

So much love for cottage cheese ✨ part of dinner 🍴// still working, think I'll be done in about two hours 😌 have a nice Saturday evening everyone 💕

Naturemakes me feel a lot better. It is like everything is okay. Best antidepresant ever.
#anorexia #anorexiarecovery #depression #depressionrecovery

Clothes don't have gender. Boys are boys even if they wear skirts. Girls are girls even if they don't wear makeup. Let people express themselves how they want, and stop assigning gender to fabric, colours, and hobbies. Most importantly, stop forcing kids into stereotypes. Let's end #genderroles. 💜
#bodypositive #bodypositivity #recovery #edrecovery #anorexia #anorexiarecovery #youarebeautiful #bulimia #bulimiarecovery #ednos #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealth #mentalillness #depressionrecovery #selfharmrecovery #loveyourself #effyourbeautystandards #lgbt #bisexual #bisexuality #lgbtpride

Stop pushing yourself, blaming yourself and being negative. Focus on the good things in your live because there is no way everything is bad. And if it seems to be, it's because you want it to. I realised I was afraid to recover because I didn't know how "normal" feels, all I have ever known is insecurity, low self steem, criticism. When I started to feel better about myself and my life in general I got scared because I thought it wouldn't last and I would be hurting again, and that can happen, but I can't be afraid forever. I try looking for the good part of everything and that is a new way of living I'm happy to discover.
#killingtheinsecurity .
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#genderfluid #androgynous #androgyne #depression #recovery #lgbt #queer #genderqueer #depressionrecovery #nonbinary #anxiety #love #picoftheday #pansexual #tomboy #lgbtq #andro #latin #fuckdepression #fuckanxiety #pansexualpride #panpride
#teen #bluefeed #positive #bodypositivity #aesthetic #fuckdepression #anxietyrecovery

Habe heute viel zu viel gegessen, aber mir blieb irgendwie nichts anderes übrig. Jetzt fühle ich mich nicht nur schlecht, jetzt ist mir auch noch übel. Fml! Meine Mutter hat für mich eingekauft und wir haben alle zusammen gegessen. Ich weiß, es ist wichtig zu essen, besonders vor den Klausuren, außerdem war ich heute morgen so schwach, dass nichts mehr ging irgendwie. Ich hab einfach weder Hunger, noch Sättigungsgefühl. Mh.
Aber wir haben endlich wieder Pfefferminztee ^^ schätzungsweise ~1500 Kalorien heute. Interessieren euch überhaupt die posts über essen und veganismus?
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#recovery #problems #depressed #depression #depressionrecovery #vegan #veganfood #veganfoodporn #foodporn #vegans #veganlover #veganlove #goth #govegan #veganism #yoga #veganlife #bowl #veganbowl #foodbowl #meal #tea #teatime #pepperminttea #cookies #vegancookies #banana #recoverywin

Working on bringing more prosperity and abundance in my life with this grid because we weren't brought into this world to live paycheck to paycheck. You want more prosperity in your life? start forming a vacuum to receive it. If you want to try healing crystals all you need is a large Citrine stone and 6 clear quartz points. Create a space in your home where you can relax, meditate, journal and create positive affirmations that will remove all negative thoughts and energy out of your life.

Mistakes. Everyone makes them. Pain. Everyone's given & received it. The thing is, you've got to OWN your mistakes to grow. Denial is a defense mechanism that produces delusional thinking. You start to co-sign your own bullshit. And the cycle continues. You fall backwards & stay in the past. I find beauty in truth, even if it's painful to hear. It's Pure. Stop. Listen. Think. Own it. Grow. Change. Learn.
Self awareness is key. ⭐️
#selfawareness #lifelessons #anxiety #ptsd #99problems #loveyourself #hustle #humbleyourself #openyourmind #fearisthemindkiller #fibromyalgia #fibromyalgiaawareness #stigmafighter #CIRS #invisibleillness #biotoxicity #mycotoxins #moldtoxicity #blackmold #stachbotrys #truthispowerful #selflove #addictionrecovery #friendsofbillw #depressionrecovery #iamthefaceofCIRS #yellowrain #breaktheinternet #distractanddisarm #greedkills

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