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安心してください、もうやらかしません🙈笑
10末にハロウィンがあるのでバキバキで脱げるよーにあと二週間でそれなりに身体を作り上げたいと思う!
とにかく腹筋と背中頑張る!

次暴飲暴食するのは大会後だなぁー、一発目は何食べよ🙈

とりあえず残り5週間必死に頑張ります!

#jin#imbd#muscle#ogr#workout#training#筋トレ#筋肉#トレーニング#ワークアウト#減量#shredding#cutting #チートデイ#やらかした

Where are my youngins at?🙋🏼
••
Do you ever feel suppressed in the fitness industry? Like there isn’t really a place for you. Because to be 100% honest with you this is how I felt, until i made that change for myself. A lot of people thought i was an educated, they think because I’m young, I don’t know what I’m talking about, I don’t have an education. While I may not know everything, nobody does, I have worked extremely hard to get where I am, experience many things that have made me a lot wiser, and educated. I follow three mentors. I read daily. I surround myself with people who I know we’re going to propel me forward, and have experienced things that will give me knowledge that I need.I currently hold to training certifications, and three specializations. I have an online business. My only goal is to help others reach their. I may not have my coffee, or some dream body with a bunch of muscle on it, and that’s because yes in the gym I do have less experience, and I can be a product of my age, but my age does not define who I am, so if you’re youngish i’m challenging you to speak out, make a difference in this industry. You’re the future. WE are the future. No excuses.

This morning I was busy planting cuttings & new plants that arrived from a far country. Unfortunately the plants dont look to good so I will do my best to make them happy again 🌱🍃 #cutting #planting #potting #newplants
#plants #plantcollection #plantlife #plantcollector #plantseverywhere #plantgang #plantlady #kamerplant #ihavethisthingwithplants #livinggreen #iloveplants #houseplants #houseplantclub #therapy #planttherapy #urbanjunglebloggers #🍃 #🌱

*awkward potato attempts self timer pics* physique/fitness update: i started a bulk in April & have gained 12 lbs since then (muscle and fat), and i think right now i am reaching the “peak” of that bulk. i’ve gotten a lot of questions on how i managed to stay (somewhat) lean through it all so here’s my answer: a) i don’t eat like an asshole lol. to me, bulking meant eating the same healthy foods I usually eat, just a bit more of it, and allowing me to enjoy meals at restaurants w my loved ones a couple times per week. b) i am not THAT lean; i just don’t gain fat in my stomach so i look leaner than i am. i gain in mostly my butt, lower back, and hamstring area. c) i have a decent amount of muscle mass which helps me look leaner than i am— I still have quad separation and lines in my core because prior to beginning lifting 3 years ago, I ran track all my life d) i try to live an active lifestyle— aside from lifting 6 days a week, i like to be moving, even if it’s not “cardio” i don’t just sit on the couch all day. however at this moment, i find myself in a bit of an odd spot because now would be the time to begin a cut... but winter is coming which is usually when most people BEGIN bulking. maybe I’ll do a mini cut, but maybe i won’t bc ya girl does like food a lot and the slim thick life isn’t thattt bad lol.hopefully this was helpful, and as usual if you ever have any questions about fitness/food/etc do not hesitate to ask me. happy monday y’all :)

And the fact that I have to hide it all only makes it worse. I hate when this happens, especially when I'm around people
-n
.
[#worthless #broken #depressed #ugly #fat #anxiety #dontgo #depression #hate #tired #selfharm #knife #hurt #fuckup #suicide #suicidal #sorry #death #cutting #cut #cutted #selfharmed #selfhatred #hatred #everythingiswrong #fakesmile]

*Insert Motivational Gym Selfie Quote Here*

MOST RECENT

ah, I can't.
I never felt more worthless than right now.
Nobody *really* wants to help me. nobody even tries to... they all make it worse.
and the voices, they call me.
they want something. they want my death. my soul.
they will get it someday... someday. yeah. why can just three words hurt me so much. words that have been said 1 year ago and i still think of it. i hate it. once you feel fine and try to climb out of the hopeless pit you are in... but then it grabs you again and it goes even deeper down. no escape.
nobody listens to me.
i hate everything. i hate this account too. i hate myself.
i wish i was as perfect as this one girl in school, that goes in HIS class. she knows i am not good enough. thats why they said it. i dont know if its true but i just feel like it is. i also have been lying so often about stuff, everyday, everyday i have to hide something... i can't anymore. and no one understands. no one wants to.
.
.
.
tags,:
#depression #anorexia #insomnia #bulima #anxiety #bipolar #posttraumaticstressdisorder#cry #ocd #nightmares #mentalhealth #death #murder #kms #die #fat #skinny#pretty#ugly #insane #tumblr #cutting

Kein positiv denken wenn alle nur noch negativ handeln.

Ti riempirai di fumo
senza dire nulla a nessuno.
Guarderai attentamente
tutti
sull’autobus.
Per poi continuare a guardare basso.
Avrai conoscenti
nessun amico.
Non puoi dirlo a nessuno.
Avrai le maniche lunghe
pur di non dover inventare altre scuse
più di quante ne inventi già.
Dormirai poco,
sul lato in cui fa meno male;
o non dormirai proprio.
Starai fissa al telefono
andrai sempre peggio a scuola.
Comincerai a sgretolarti piano piano.
O ti ucciderai direttamente.
Suicidio.
È una parola forte,
so che ci pensi ogni giorno.
Ancora
non ti sei abituata?
Q: vi siete mai fatti male?
#love#hurt#cutting#down#likeforlike#commentforcomment#live#love#life#fuckyou#fuck#problems

[17th October/Tuesday/8:51pm]
Despite my legs dangling off the edge of my window, I'm still not sure if I'd want to jump. I'd miss my boyfriend and my family. I think they'd miss me. But at the same time I just want the bad feelings and thoughts to stop. I'd maybe like to die, but I'm scared about what happens when you die. Do heaven & hell exist? Are we reincarnated? What happens?
Is death the end, does it really matter?
My head is cloudy and my feet are cold. I miss my boyfriend. --
#ritzen #ritzen #ritzenliebe #cuts #cutting #selfharn #selfharrrm #selfhate #automutilation #selfmutilation #depressed #depression #anxiety #eatingdisorder #anorexia #bulimia #sad #upset #crying #empty #kms #selfharn #selfharmmm

Kleiner Statusupdate 💭
Ich komme höchstwahrscheinlich Freitag endlich aus der Geschlossenen raus. Montags geht es dann wieder ab in die Klinik - Und Ende November habe ich ein Vorstellungsgespräch in einer Spezialklinik. Solange bin ich auch von der Schule krankgeschrieben, der Antrag auf Wiederholung wurde schon gestellt... Ich habe Angst vor dem was kommt, aber ich versuche optimistisch zu bleiben!
[ #recovery #psychiatrie #psychiatric #selfharrm #ritzen #svv #selfharmm #cutting #eatingdisorder #ed #anorexic #ana #transgender #mentalhealth #edrecovery #selfinjury #suicide #instahealth #trans #depression #depressed #anxiety #transboy #male #borderline ]

If you don’t accept me at my bulk then don’t accept me at my cut 😌. Eating 2000 calories has been hard for me, I’ve been revers dieting for the past 2 months and I will cut in another week or so. 😭😭#health #diet #cleaneating #gym #quadzilla #girlswholift #cutting #abs #glutes #fitspo #fitness #fitnessmotivation #abs #leanbulk #HIIT #mealprep #hipthrusts #macros #iffym #squats #transformationthursday #transformation #weightloss #fit #fitspo #fitnessmotivation #fitfam #npc #bikini

I can't controle myself and my mind... #selfharn #death #suicidalgirl #Suicide #blood #cutting

Te presentamos el #BasicKit para nuestro Curso de #estilista Básico 💇🏽‍♂️💇🏻 #FormandoProfesionalesDelEstilismo #stylist #cutting #styling #makeupartist #schoolstyle #academia #altopeinado #barberia #colorimetria #cortedepelo #maquillajeprofesional @kokoromx
Pronto tendremos nueva fecha de curso sabatino ¡¡¡Ven y visítanos en nuestras instalaciones!!! 🙋🏻🙋🏻‍♂️ nos encontramos ubicados en 🚋 CETRAM CUATRO CAMINOS, Transmisiones Militares 30 Interior LB32
Colonia Fraccionamiento Industrial Naucalpan Estado de México CP 53240

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