A lot of what we’ve been conditioned to understand love to be is actually a toxic recycling of old pain patterns and undigested emotional debris.
Here’s the thing about resonance, it doesn’t require you to hustle for your worth.
Resonance means being in harmony with.
To be clear harmony isn’t about sameness, it’s about connections and energies that are complementary.
Energies that fit together.
Energies that understand one another.
Energies that respect each other.
Often in the dating and relationship world I see so many humans trying to convince the person they’re with that they’re worthy of being met fully.
But the thing is you can’t be met fully by someone you don’t have resonance with.
Literally your pieces don’t match.
I like to think of it like a lock and key.
When you have resonance or alignment with someone your key fits in their lock (or vice versa). You wouldn’t tell a key it wasn’t worthy because it didn’t fit in a lock. Just like you wouldn’t tell a lock it wasn’t valuable because it didn’t fit with a certain key.
We can logically understand with this example it’s just not a match. Not a fit.
Nothing to do with worth or value. Just aligned or misaligned. A match or a mismatch.
But here’s the kicker, to really embrace this when it comes to love and relationships we need to get a handle on our own unconscious patterns, our relational template and start the inner work of integrating our old undigested hurts.
Without doing this we literally recycle the same relational experiences with each new partner.
Do this enough times and you might convince yourself you’re not worthy of love or that there is something fundamentally flawed about you or that you’re just cursed in love.
The good news is your not cursed, flawed or unworthy.
The double good news is shifting your results in love is a primarily inside game.
This inner work enables you to strengthen your “love picker” aka the filter you use to determine alignment, and when your love picker heals over, discernment is in top form and who we choose drastically shifts.
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