A downward dog! My first in months, literally months. Some things I wanted to share, although it’s hard to see proper shape in the lump of fluff which is my dressing gown... notice how bent my knees are. It’s not about getting your heels to the floor - I have tight hamstrings that only got somewhere near when I was in a regular “normal” practise. The importance in DWD is to keep your spine straight, don’t arch in the upper back or dip/sink in the lower. It will make the pose harder, cost you more energy and potential damage to your back. Keep it in a straight line to the tip of your tail bone (resisted drawing a tail on myself here) and bend the knees as much as you know you need to. It’s important to keep your sacrum safe and not rounded, therefore pulling on it and doing potential harm. Keep your arms in close to your ears and round the elbows outward to stabilise and engage upper arm muscles. Don’t push yourself to this if it’s not appropriate, I needed it after a long morning travelling and a plane flight. Now to await the joy of my food shop delivery!! 😘🙏🏻 #thankyousainsburysgods #spoonie #spoonieyoga #chronicfatigue #chronicfatigueyoga #invisibleillness #cfs

When you're trying to yoga and a fluffy lion sprawls on you for snugs 😍 Excuse the mess in the background, I was having a break half way through striping the bed 😊

Health update: Still struggling with viruses. Still can't hear anything, massively swollen glands, sore throat, sinus blocked etc. It's been weeks now and it's not getting any better. Not sure what to do to help really, I'm considering going to the doctors but there's nothing they can really for for Viruses! Thankfully it's not making me too much more fatigued than normal, pain and brain fog are most definitely worse though.

So I missed dinner with the girls on Galentines day and lunch out with a friend yesterday. I don't make plans very often so when I do I hate having to cancel. As much as I know it's not my fault, I still feel like a total flaky let down. It's hard to make advance plans as I never know how I'm going to be until the day. I don't want to say no then miss out when I could've done it, but I feel awful saying yes then cancelling on the day and letting people down. It's a hard one to get around. I don't like being that person 'oh, invite her but she'll never turn up' all the time. It's rare I do get invited you things anymore, most likely for that reason! How do you all manage it?

Rectangle cat. He has two of these vans shoe boxes, they're his favourite. He fills every corner with fluff, cats are indeed liquid 😂

We've been getting up way earlier than normal this week as we've had loads of morning appointments and things for the pub. It's not been too difficult as we've been in bed earlier, but I'm not getting quite enough sleep and I'm starting to feel it (compared to normal, I don't think I've had enough sleep in 20 years 😂). This glandular fever/epstein Barr flare up is still carrying on, glands are like golf balls again this morning and my throat feels like someone sandpapered it. I need to boost my immune system after the beating it's had the last couple of months, it's definitely struggling!

So this is how poorly I've been, the tree only came down yesterday! I don't put any other decorations up so it wasn't mega Christmassy or anything, it was just a tree in the corner that I didn't have the energy to do anything about 😂 should've left it up until next year, the corner of my room looks so bare now 😁

I'm pretty much doing nothing but work and rest at the moment but I'm glad I'm able to do that. Still not recovered from Christmas/new year but I'm getting there. Virus on top of virus is not helping matters though, my body's decided to welcome all the bugs to the party 😂 hope you're all doing well 💙

Kitten face 💙

Just checking in. I'm starting to feel more alive, finally! Still got lots of pain and can't shift this cold/chest infection but I'm so much better than the last few weeks. Mark took me out for dinner last night, it was so good to get out the house! I feel pretty dreadful today but it was totally worth it.

I've got a hell of a lot of work to do before the end of this month so if I'm a bit quiet, that's why. I need to get caught up on the orders that came in while I was sick and have my tax return to do before the 31st. As usual, I've left it to the last minute and haven't organised my accounts for a whole year. You'd think after 14 years being self employed I'd be more organised 😂

I've got some serious business planning to do over the next couple of months, big changes happening that I'll go into more detail about once it's all confirmed.

2 weeks in and I'm starting to feel a little more human again. I'm still fighting off a chest infection and suffering a lot of pain and weakness but yesterday I managed to do a bit of shop work for the first time in weeks and hopefully today I can manage a bit of housework and planning. I'm so fed up of being trapped in bed not even able to use my tablet, doing the washing up almost sounds exciting 😂😂

Ok, own up, which one of you lovelies send me the surprise package?
Whoever it was, thank you so much, it's really made my day and I might have cried a little 😊 I've had such a horrible couple of weeks, it really cheered me up, thank you 😙 Send me a message as I'd love to know who it was 💙💙💙

Giant mug of tomato soup, wearable blanket thing I got for Christmas and netflix.

So for the first time in days I've managed to get to the bathroom by myself! I didn't have to be carried and didn't cry, it was such a relief. I've also managed to eat just now and keep it down, sit upright, stay awake and lucid for more than 30 minutes at a time, all for the first time this year 😂 I still feel horrendous and definitely have a virus on top of everything else but it feels so good to feel some improvement and yeah, be able to pee without help is always nice 😊

Sorry for not replying to any messages etc. I thought last week was bad but this week has been one of the worst I've felt in 18 years I think. Not moved out of bed for over 2 days except to be helped to the loo (great fun), pain has been a constant 8/10 even with all of the painkillers and I've pretty much spent the whole time dozing or hallucinating.
I've got a fever, hot cold sweats, burning chest, migrane, swollen glands and can't hold down anything more than water. So yeah, Happy New Year 😂

Despite feeling physically horrendous, I'm just trying to ride it out, mentally, I've only been coherent for 30 mins at a time so I'm not laid here worrying or anything. I'm actually quite excited about feeling better and starting to plan this year out. Loads of thoughts and ideas, I've been thinking back on last year and what I want to change and what I've accomplished and I can't wait get January's bullet journal planned out with a big old review of last year.

I hope everyone's having a good new year so far, I know quite a few of you are fighting a Christmas flare up too; get plenty of rest, it will pass 💙

Haha! I just love grumpy cat! Can you relate to this one? 🙋🏻✨ Getting started with a consistent exercise routine can be such a challenge, and when you're living with a chronic illness, that challenge becomes even more daunting. One day of too much exercise can mean a week in bed trying to recover. This has definitely happened to me! Sometimes I'm just too ambitious for my own good. Then on the other hand, not enough exercise can be just as detrimental because not moving our bodies on a regular basis can mean an increase in pain and fatigue. Finding balance is tricky, but I have some tips for you! Check out the link in my profile to watch the video @sleepysantosha 💕

Had the worst crash in a long time today. It's my own fault for pushing it the last 2 weeks. I really forced myself to keep going until Christmas day was over and now that I've stopped, everything's given up.
So today was spent in bed napping on and off, dosed up on painkillers, emergency painkillers, wrapped in heated blankets, waiting for Mark to finish work at 7pm so I could finally get out of bed. I always forget how hard it is having days where I can't get out of bed, feed myself, get to the bathroom etc without help. I couldn't even use my phone to message him to say I was stuck until 6pm. I'm so thankful they don't happen often at the moment because they're pretty damn terrifying. I know some people go through it every day and think they are bloody amazing to stay so positive and strong.

We spent the evening curled up on the sofa in front of the fire and I felt well enough to eat something and watch a bit of TV which considering how crap I felt, was actually a lovely way to spend the night.

I can see that I'm far from the only one having a post Christmas flare up and just wanted to send lots of love to you all and I hope that your flares subside very soon 💙

Twig loves pulling the baubles from the tree!

I'm laid awake at 5am with painsomnia even though I'm absolutely shattered. Places are hurting I didn't even know could hurt 😂 had a lovely Christmas though, ate too much, drank too much, laughed a lot and loved spending time with my favourites 😊💙

Leafy love 😍 We had to take him to the vets this morning as Little Cat swiped him last night and tore his eye ball. It's not needed stitching yet, but the cut was quite deep, hopefully the antibiotics and eye drops will help.

It was really traumatic and stressful, I'd had about 3 hours sleep with him curled up by my feet, I was really worried. Then he hates the box so we fought to get him in there and when we did he cried and wet himself as he was scared. I burst into tears and just couldn't cope with him being frightened. Thankfully as soon as we got outside he was okay and he was great with the vet. Rolling about being cute as usual.

Stressed me out as we've had to find £50 we don't have and another £40 next week for the check up. (We are so skint at the moment we can't pay bills never mind buy Christmas presents.) I've slept the majority of this afternoon but am just exhausted. I'm supposed to be at a friends for Yule celebrations but I currently can't even get out of bed. I'm honestly dreading the next 2 weeks and am really struggling to get into the spirit of things. I always find this time of year hard, but this year is way more than usual. Anyone have any coping tips? I really want to enjoy the next 2 weeks and not be such a scrooge 😏

Spending the morning photographing a big pile of stuff I've made for my Etsy shop @neonblackuk

I'm having to sit on the floor for 10 minutes between each item. It's really hard work today but needs to be done, I've put it off all week so far but I really have to sell some things or no one is getting a thing for Christmas!
Managed a whole 4 hours sleep last night. I woke up at 9am to a really loud Street cleaner buzzing past the window. In my dream it was a bee that got stuck up my nose 😂😂😂

I'm still really suffering with this virus and look at crap as I feel but... I wanted to talk about hair.

M.E and Fibro people, are you losing your hair and do you have any tips to help stop it happening? I've noticed I'm losing a lot more hair than normal when I brush it, it feels thinner when I tie it up and I've got spots that are noticeably thinning. This has only started happening after I relapsed a couple of years back, but mainly the last 6 months or so.

I dye my hair twice a year, hardly ever use heat or product on it and wash it every 1-2 weeks, so it's in good condition, it's not snapping off, more like falling out. I've always had a lot of hair and treated it a way worse than I do now so I know it's nothing I'm doing. I take a shed load of vitamins and supplements but if anyone has any specific recommendations I'm all up for trying more.

I've spent the last 5 years growing it from shaved short and I'm worried I'm going to have to get it all cut off again if it gets any worse 😕

Monday is not going as to plan. I've not even made it out of bed yet and it's 3.30pm!
I had a busier than expected weekend and am full of cold on top of it so today I'm having a rest day and hoping everything's eased off a bit tomorrow. Sometimes you've just got to admit defeat and rest. I know I'll make it worse by pushing myself so netflix and cat snuggles it is 😊

Caught Twig mid yawn 😊

So the after the painsomnia, cold sweats and lack of sleep I've woken up with another virus. Woo hoo. I could feel something was off more than usual and could've predicted it but I was foolishly hoping I'd be ok after some sleep.
My to-do list for today is getting scraped, the house is staying a total mess and food will have to cook it's self while I crash out, dose up on painkillers and feel sorry for myself while binge watching Star Trek 😊

I love this boy 😍

5.30am painsomnia and restless leg syndrome. Fun. 😣😦😤

Leaf being super helpful while I'm filling in my energy tracker 😂

I've done a silly thing and pushed far too hard through the last 2 weeks. I had to do some work this afternoon even though I knew id already pushed it too far this week already and now I've massively crashed. I've got so much to do this week too! I really need to start pacing properly instead of a constant 'boom and bust' cycle which I never properly rest in. I've got some things I wanted to get done this evening but now I'm laid in a crumpled heap on the sofa frustrated with myself and with being ill and not being able to do much more than close my eyes and breathe through the pain. I'm getting kitty snuggles though so it's not all bad 😊

I need to take my own advice and stop thinking 'I'll just do that little bit more work" "I might as well do the dishes while cooking dinner" "I might as well do a few days worth of shopping instead of one" "I'll just do another hour on the computer" etc etc. I need to take scheduled rest stops, delegate tasks to the other two living here and remember that I can't do everything I want without breaking! This is me giving myself a slap on the wrist and holding myself accountable!

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