It is basically quite difficult to have daily battles against Råidde that not everyone sees my struggling. And when i say nothing about it, then it's probably very few people know about my battles. daily battles is both large and small. When the one I fight against has built up its expertise against me in 30 years. So it is not easy to get the upper hand and when I get it. Then Råidde turn focus, then have råidde power and ascendancy again. So you sort of start again, at least the way it feels. Råidde is my eating disorder. Råidde is my overeating. Råidde is my addiction.
Råidde controls an enormous amount of my everyday life. Råidde has so much power. During periods im so shy to everything and everyone. Will just disappear and be gone. I'm like a yoyo. Changes moods as fast.. In this periods I keep myself. And have enough to cope with myself.
Is so much, more difficult, bad, hard, sad, frustrating, etc. to have it like that and not have control over Råidde.
Be so furious with myself because I do not find out of this.
It's probably some of you reading this who thinks this is strange and possibly stupid to write. But I am writing to rediskover Råidde and take back power in life.
Rice & praise is allowed. Ability to find new methods to beat Råidde and will be of great help.
#blæh #matvrak #overspising #eatdisorder #eatlikeapig #gastricbypass #spiseforstyrrelse #life #kampenmotråidde #dailybattles #dagligkamp #slitsomt