In a world of sink or swim I'm definitely doing both. Like a bouy in stormy waters bobbing down and coming back up. At least I hope I'm a bouy, those things always ultimately float right? Sometimes I think I get tangled in the things below and it takes me a while to resurface. There have been major changes this year, both good and bad. A good one being this Instagram account and everything it's brought me, but also there have been bad things. Not like regular, every day bad like spilling your coffee, but heavy bad, irreversible bad, life altered kind of bad. The things that keep me tangled underneath the surface for a while. I'm dealing with it to the best of my ability, but it's phases, like waves, a good period where I'm relatively ok, and can actually be productive, and then I sink back down again and can't seem to accomplish anything. Fucking up all my deadlines. I know it's life, I know I need to feel it, ride it out. It'll get better in time, I mean some things will get worse before they get better, but in the grand scheme I trust I'll be ok. But all the same, even with that knowledge, it's still the heaviest feeling when you're just below the surface and can't take a breath.