#beatinged

MOST RECENT

Currently getting ready to head back down to my uni apartment! Tomorrow is my first official full day back to uni ahhh! Crazy nervous but it’s okay I know I’ll be okay. Just need to take every moment as it comes and try to stay POSITIVE. Food wise I’m not giving myself any excuses so I’ve packed all my snacks/lunch and I’m going to have a good breakfast before I leave in the morning! I can’t believe I’m officially back to uni! Scary!!!! But also good!!! I don’t know I’m rambling ahh sorry haha just so many thoughts racing through my head!

Dinner today was a HUGE PRE-ED fave of battered fish from birdseye🐠😍 and my mums homemade chips that she does in the actifryer🍟 (she never buys oven chips as she’s all about that healthy lifestyle😕😂) topped with gravy💪🏻 slight anxiety and spontaneity in regards to this as my mum told me this morning she was going cottage pie for dinner; but when I got back, there had been a leak in the boiler room of our house and she hadn’t had time to start it so she said she was doing fish and chips😳😳😳 I instantly freaked out and wanted to grab a safe option of chicken or something from Asda but fuck it. I refuse to keep wasting money when my mum does perfecting balanced, tasty meals from scratch!!🙊 no more! -
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Feeling very empty this afternoon, like somethings missing almost. I’m not sure what but I don’t like this feeling😳😕 along with this feeling I’m also feeling hella fucking guilty for this meal but I’m trying to remind myself that as much as I know recovery isn’t about ‘healthy’ etc, but my mums chips are cooked with 0 oil so I don’t understand why my head is giving me so much shit for it! Yes, the fish was fairly oily but whatever, I liked it! I used to love a good cod fillet so fuck of anorexia! Bye bitch!😶 please leave me alone! -
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Already thinking of what to have for night snack and tbf all I can think about is sweets😂 I’m actually sick of chocolate but then I can’t stop thinking about that either?! I hate mental hunger, it’s definitely something I struggle with more than anything! A few ‘rules and regulations’ need to be broken with my recovery too and that’s something I’m going to start challenging!!! COME ON GUYS, let’s recover❤️❤️❤️ -
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#anorexia#anorexiarecovery#anorexianervosarecovery#anorexianervosa#anarecovery#ana#strongnotskinny#recoverywin#recovery#recoveryisworthit#edrecovery#eatingdisorderecovery#eatingdisorder#eatingdisorders#eattobeatit#lunch#beatingana#beatinged#ana#anorexianervosa#beatingeatingdisorders#positivity#prorecovery#edrecovery#foodie#foodporn#increase#nutella#food#snack#breakfast#mentalhealth#recoverywin#foodie#recoverywin

Good morning everyone💕 -
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Starting the day off today with a bowl of @phdnutritionuk peanut butter protein powder oats🥜 topped with strawberries🍓 mimi smarties🍫 and a @reesesuk pumpkin🎃 courtesy of @nourisht0flourish ❤️❤️❤️ -
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I am soooo tired. OMG I actually feel disgusting😶 the mix of Friday and yesterday was too much! I’m shattered! Going out with my friends Friday afternoon, to the ball Friday night, then staying up till god knows what time, to then get up for 8am and getting ready for work, working at dance yesterday 11-2:30, then to merry hill to meet my friend which was very spontaneous (I HAD NANDOS: chicken, chips and halloumi😶😶😶), then straight to my showgirl booking which was 5:30-9! Getting home for 9:30, getting some food down me and then bed! To get up this morning and I’ve got work this morning😳 roll on bed time already! Honestly!😴😴 one of the girls had tonsillitis last night and I’m hoping I’m not coming down with it! It was such a good night though! The compliments I received from the ‘boss’ were so lovely! She took a photo of me and was like ‘can you not see how beautiful you look’ and I was honest and just said no. Because I don’t. I really don’t. She then said that I remind her a lot of herself when she first started...she was shy, not confident etc but doing showgirling, it made her confidence bloom and that’s exactly what she’s going to help me with! I already feel so grateful for being given opportunities like this! I refuse to give up and let my head bully me!!! I’ve been given this opportunity and I’m going to take it and run with it! Fuck anorexia!!! -
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Time to get ready for today then, have a lovely day❤️❤️❤️ -
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#anorexia#anorexiarecovery#anorexianervosarecovery#anorexianervosa#anarecovery#ana#strongnotskinny#recoverywin#recovery#recoveryisworthit#edrecovery#eatingdisorderecovery#eatingdisorder#eatingdisorders#eattobeatit#lunch#beatingana#beatinged#ana#anorexianervosa#beatingeatingdisorders#positivity#prorecovery#edrecovery#foodie#foodporn#increase#nutella#food#snack#breakfast#mentalhealth#recoverywin#foodie#recoverywin

Tried this for the first time tonight and mmmm it was quite YUM! 😋🙌🏻 super sweet and soft! Excited to try more of their products!

Xoxo
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Breakfast: an apricot
Lunch: a bag of lettuce and 2 mini tortillas with chicken curry and a rice pudding
A/snack: frisko ice cream
Pre dance snack: banana protein bar
Dinner: lettuce, cucumber and 2 mini tortillas with chicken curry
N/snack: pombar crisps

#anorexia #anorexianervosa #ed #edfighter #edsucks #edrecovery #recovery #recoveryishard #anaisabitch #goawayana #eatingdisordersucks #anorexiarecovery #beatana #edfight #anawho #fuckyouana #recoveryfamily #prorecovery #recovertolive #backtonormallife #beatingana #beatinged #edwarrior #fightana #fightanorexia #anorexiafighter #eatingdisorderfight #strongnotskinny #edfam #edcommunity

~ Chicken burger over a beef burger every time! Who’s with me??? ~
Everything is done and dusted for London FINALLY!!! I can’t believe I go on Tuesday afternoon it’s all happening so fast but as much as I am nervous I’m also really excited! Money however has been such a worry but thankfully my parents have been amazing with helping me out but I won’t lie the guilt from them helping me out is making me so anxious. I’ve always had a job since I was 16 and never took or asked for money off them but since having to leave work last November I haven’t managed to get another job (I have been trying). I feel like such a burden and I feel terrible because they’ve already done so much for me and now since paying my first 3 months rent my student loan is completely gone already🙃 I just hope one day I can pay them back! But despite all of these feelings and emotions I’m learning to deal with them in a healthier way and tbh my eatings been the best it’s been in a VERY long time! No matter how I feel I still need to eat and I’m finally beginning to recognise and accept that! I’ve been getting a lot of messages recently and I promise I’m trying my very best to get back to every single one of you! Sorry it’s just taking a little bit longer!

Let’s talk about intuitive eating. This is something that I’m still working on myself and, on Saturday, I felt like I ate the most freely I have in a very long time.
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I started my day with a challenging breakfast, but one that I wanted. Then, we met up with friends and cousins and spent the day out together. For dinner we had Shake Shack - my first one ever - and I had a chicken burger 🍔 with added cheese 🧀 and fries 🍟 I also had some of my brother’s cheese fries simply because they looked good 😍 After that, we went to M&M world and I had a couple of M&M’s just coz 🤷🏼‍♀️ Then, we went to a huge sweet shop where everyone bought loads. I was really full but I’ve gotta admit they looked too good to miss out on so I had as much as I wanted 🍬🍫 Later on in the evening, we went to a cute little café. I shared an ice cream milkshake with my brother and my cousin couldn’t finish her’s so I finished it off for her 😋 Same cousin didn’t want the rest of her sweets so I happily took them when she offered. On our way back home at 11:30 pm, I was craving sweets so I got them out and my brother and I snacked on them.
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The best bit is that none of this was planned and none of it felt like a big deal! Food wasn’t the main point of focus here. Being with people I love and having fun was and food was a bonus for enjoyment! It honestly felt so liberating and empowering 😊🍃🌺
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#anorexia #anorexianervosa #anorexic #ana #anarecovery #anawho #ed #edfam #edfamily #ednos #edrecovery #edsoldier #edwarrior #anorexiarecovery #eatingdisorder #eatingdisorderrecovery #recover #recovery #prorecovery #depression #anxiety #strongnotskinny #recoveryisworthit #nourishtoflourish #edcommunity #beatinged #recoverywin #nourishnotpunish #prorecovery #weightrestored

When I was recovering, memes like this used to make me feel better. ‘Oh phew!’ I thought. ‘I’m not fat. Thank goodness.’ What I (and so many models of treatment back then) failed to understand was that this model of recovery is rooted in oppression. We all have fat. Some people are fat. And reassuring someone that they’re not fat contributes to the belief that being fat is bad.

Being fat is NOT BAD. We are all different sizes—and telling yourself that you’re not a certain shape to feel better actually oppresses (and contributes to societal hatred of) people who are that shape.
We are people. We are worthy. Full stop.
#recovery #recoverywarrior #edrecovery #bodyimage #selfesteem #fatacceptance #haes #anorexiarecovery #bulimiarecovery #eatingdisorderrecovery #eatingdisorder #eatingdisorderawareness #ditchthediet #beatinged #inspiration #selfhelp

[weetabix with cinnamon and brown sugar || topped with shredded coconut, chia seeds & smooth biscoff spread🍯]
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good morning!🌞
feeling quite overwhelmed today, but im going to write it off as guilt from last night - even though i know i shouldn't be guilty.
all of this was completely unmeasured, which was so scary but i smashed it! 💪🏻 i had a snack after breakfast, which i usually never do but i was really craving a peanut bar, so i had one. im feeling really guilty and restriction thoughts are loud but not going to listen to them, especially considering how well i did yesterday. 💛
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q: what's your favourite nut butter?
#fearfood #recovery #eatingdisorderrecovery #anarecovery #anorexia #anorexiarecovery #eatingdisorder #recoveryaccount #recoveryisworthit #edwarrior #ana #anorexianervosa #eatittobeatit #foodporn #foodie #recoveryjourney #ednos #mentalhealth #beatinganorexia #beatinged #anorexianervosarecovery #atypicalanorexia #recoverychallenge
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filter used: @polarrpresets

This is me. I am bent, but not broken. I am scared but not disfigured. I am sad, but not hopeless. I am tired, but not lifeless. I am afraid, but not powerless. I am angry, but not bitter. I am lost, but I’m not giving up!💕 -
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Last night was truly one to remember...and for all the good reasons! I partied with my friends, I drank what alcohol I wanted to drink (maybe a little too much🍷🥂🍸🍹), I ate whatever the hell I wanted...I craved chocolate and got some, I joined in with takeaway afterwards! I had some chicken strippers and chips! Have I work up fat? Nope! Am I dead? Nope! Did I enjoy myself? HELL TO THE YES!!!!🤣🤭 and you know why? Because I said a big FUCK YOU to anorexia and did what sasha wanted to do!!!! The amount of comments I got last night varying from, ‘you look amazing’, ‘I’m soo proud of you’, ‘you’ve come so far’! I was honestly amazed! I had a heart to heart with one of my closest friends, I had some of his cider (😂) and he turned around and said ‘you know what sash, I’m so proud of you! You wouldn’t have done that even a month ago’...and that’s true! I would have been scared shitless of the calories in one sip of a drink...HAHA, fuck off! No More! I would not have enjoyed myself as much as I did last night if it wasn’t for recovery!!! So please, god damn choose it! I promise, it’s worth it! -
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Up early and ready for a busy day of working and starting my new showgirling today too🙊🙊🙊 LETS GO! -
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I am me. I am not willing to change for anyone. Take me as I am, or watch me as I go! -
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#anorexia#anorexiarecovery#anorexianervosarecovery#anorexianervosa#anarecovery#ana#strongnotskinny#recoverywin#recovery#recoveryisworthit#edrecovery#eatingdisorderecovery#eatingdisorder#eatingdisorders#eattobeatit#lunch#beatingana#beatinged#ana#anorexianervosa#beatingeatingdisorders#positivity#prorecovery#edrecovery#foodie#foodporn#increase#nutella#food#snack#breakfast#mentalhealth#recoverywin#foodie#recoverywin

Dinner was so much, but really, like to much, it's a huge plate... It kinda felt like a binge or something, but that's just ana speaking i guess? Had a super hard dance class after dinner so i needed the energy tbh. When i came back i had this chinois thing and it's so good! It's a french pastry with cream.😋😋💕
Xoxo
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Breakfast: strawberry protein quark
Lunch: a bag of sweet coconut & vanilla popcorn and a cola zero
Dinner: to much rice pilav with 2 mini tortillas
N/snack: 'chinois'

#anorexia #anorexianervosa #ed #edfighter #edsucks #edrecovery #recovery #recoveryishard #anaisabitch #goawayana #eatingdisordersucks #anorexiarecovery #beatana #edfight #anawho #fuckyouana #recoveryfamily #prorecovery #recovertolive #backtonormallife #beatingana #beatinged #edwarrior #fightana #fightanorexia #anorexiafighter #eatingdisorderfight #strongnotskinny #edfam #edcommunity

Hey guys💖 First of all sorry for my absence and for being inactive atm. I try to be more active at least in my story.
Tomorrow I have to pack my bag for my class trip and on monday morning (5 am) I’ll go by bus towards France and then by the Ferry to England. I’m so exited for this trip, it’ll be a completely new experience to stay in guest families. But I think it will be great🌤


#edrecovery #recovery #eatingdisorderrecovery #eatingdisorder #anorexiarecovery #anorexianervosa #beatingana #recoveryisworthit #recoveryanorexia #recoveryquotes #recoverywarrior #edfighter #recoveryispossible #recoveryjourney #recoveryforlife #anarecovery #recoveryprocess #recoverytime #orthorexia #orthorexiarecovery #roadtorecovery #recoverylife #intuitiveeating #beatinganorexia #anxiety #beatinged #fightforfreedom #recoveryisworthit #fearfood #recoverywin #ed

I have a crazy busy week ahead of me. I’m starting uni full time from Monday (with a crazy hectic timetable🙃) AND I fly to London ON MY OWN on Tuesday night for my Disney interview on Wednesday morning(!!!!) I’m so crazy nervous I swear I was so close to not going but I know I’d regret it if I didn’t at least go and try. But because I was so indecisive I literally only booked my flights last night and then when I went to book the hotel I stayed in last time it was booked out! Thankfully I got another hotel close by but omg good bye student loan already! Things are really starting to look up. This time last year I was at my worst and just miserable BUT now I’m so hopeful about the future. I know what I want and I know that in order to achieve what I want I need to look after myself. But this is just a reminder to anyone who may be reading this right now...I promise it does get better! But you need to fight for it to get better and YOU CAN DO IT!

HELLO BEAUTIFUL😍😍😍 -
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Been buzzing for this all day and omg it did not disappoint🙊 a FULL WAFFLE💪🏻 topped with nutella, Ferrero Rocher, nuts and strawberries🍫🥜🍓 with the side of Ferrero Rocher ice cream🍨 and cream🤭 I genuinely feel like I could eat this all again! Feel like a greedy pig saying that but it’s true😂🤣 -
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So, preparations begin! A night to remember and I’m going to make sure it is!!! I refuse to let the fact I’ve eaten this with my friends have a toll on how I feel in a dress! Who cares if I look/feel bloated?! Who cares how much weight I’ve regained lately?! I’m regaining life and freedom and that is all that matters!!! I have more of a genuine smile on my face now than I have done over the past few years and that’s good enough for me! Fuck the weight, fuck the feelings...I want life! I’m going to enjoy tonight and have a dance with the bestest of friends I’ve gained over the past few years! They have never once left my side despite all the shit I’ve gone through, despite making others feel like they couldn’t help me, they never turned their backs! Yes, one or two people did, but to me that just shows that if they can’t handle me at my worst, they sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best!! ONWARDS AND UPWARDS💪🏻💕 -
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Here’s to an amazing night, week, month...LIFE❤️ -
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#anorexia#anorexiarecovery#anorexianervosarecovery#anorexianervosa#anarecovery#ana#strongnotskinny#recoverywin#recovery#recoveryisworthit#edrecovery#eatingdisorderecovery#eatingdisorder#eatingdisorders#eattobeatit#lunch#beatingana#beatinged#ana#anorexianervosa#beatingeatingdisorders#positivity#prorecovery#edrecovery#foodie#foodporn#increase#nutella#food#snack#breakfast#mentalhealth#recoverywin#foodie#recoverywin

I've had a very rough week. I've felt like pure shit both physically and emotionally. Being away from family (because I live 14,500km away now) has been the hardest part of this week.
To recap:
- my grandfather passed away and I didn't get the chance to say goodbye
- I binge-ate mac and cheese + cookies one night instead of actually working through my emotions
- I had an ovarian cyst rupture so I've been in excrutiating pain (it's tolerable now) and getting zero sleep
- I went to a doctor while in said pain and he laughed it off and told me no tests could be done and gave me medicine for "acute stomach ache relief" 😒

Today, however, things have gotten better. I went to a different doctor who listened, understood, and cared enough to help me. I got to go to a careers fest specifically for dietitian students so I could hear about alllllll the different pathways to take with my degree. I've had constant love and support from friends and family, no matter how far. And I took the rest of the day to rest, relax, and be lazy.

It sucks when things go bad, get hard, and it seems like the world is against you...BUT there really is a light at the end of the tunnel. .
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#health #fitness #recovery #edrecovery #loveyourself #healthy #mindbodysoul #beatinged #recoveryjourney #recoverywin #selflove #yourbodyisntwrong #edwarrior #keepfighting #lifting #aesthetic #fitchick #pageantgirl #sydney #bikini #selfhelp #rdtobe

Went for a different breakfast this morning of two pieces of 50/50 toast🍞topped with @grenadeofficial carb Killa spread😍 and strawberries🍓 I think both me and my body are getting sick of proats at the minute as I’m not being able to finish it most the time as it just gets too sickly...and I have too much to do today anyway so I couldn’t be bothered to sit and make them and then wait for the microwave etc😳😂 -
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So yeah, today’s a busy one...I’ve got to have a shower, wash, dry and straighten my hair😶, then I’m meeting my friend from uni to go somewhere VERY exciting🙊 then we’re going over to a hotel to get ready for the graduation ball tonight👯‍♀️ and then obviously going over to the graduation ball to celebrate🎉 I’m nervous to say the leasttttt! I don’t even know why, like there’s nothing to be nervous about AT ALL! So why am I stressing? My heads giving me a lot of shit that because I’ve got to wear a dress tonight that I need to compensate on food today...but we all know that’s bullshit and can’t happen! I’ve got a lot to do to keep myself busy so hopefully the thoughts should fade! I haven’t even packed my bags or anything! We’re staying at the hotel tonight too, I’ve got work tomorrow and then I have my new showgirl Job tomorrow evening....busy weekend then really because then I’ve got work Sunday too🙊😂 there’s no stopping with me!!!! -
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I’ll leave you with those: to the one soul that’s reading this...I know you’re tired. you’re fed up. You’re so close to breaking BUT there is strength within you, even when you feel week! Please, keep fighting❤️ -
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#anorexia#anorexiarecovery#anorexianervosarecovery#anorexianervosa#anarecovery#ana#strongnotskinny#recoverywin#recovery#recoveryisworthit#edrecovery#eatingdisorderecovery#eatingdisorder#eatingdisorders#eattobeatit#lunch#beatingana#beatinged#ana#anorexianervosa#beatingeatingdisorders#positivity#prorecovery#edrecovery#foodie#foodporn#increase#nutella#food#snack#breakfast#mentalhealth#recoverywin#foodie#recoverywin

[chocolate mug cake || topped with smooth biscoff spread 🍫]
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good morning! 🌞
yaaay!! it's my birthday! ✨
who says you can't have cake for breakfast? (probably no one)
this was a recipe from @chocolatecoveredkatie 's blog, it tasted far better than it looks!
my birthday is going great so far!🌻
have a great day🌱
q: do you like cake?
#fearfood #recovery #eatingdisorderrecovery #anarecovery #anorexia #anorexiarecovery #eatingdisorder #recoveryaccount #recoveryisworthit #edwarrior #ana #anorexianervosa #eatittobeatit #foodporn #foodie #recoveryjourney #ednos #mentalhealth #beatinganorexia #beatinged #anorexianervosarecovery #atypicalanorexia #recoverychallenge
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filter used: @polarrpresets

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