I saw him for the first time in two months. He looked the same- tall demeanor, grown out beard, same squared glasses where his black long eyelashes hid behind.
He looked the same, but was a different person. He didn’t once tilt his head back as he laughed his loud laugh when we spoke. I didn’t even know how to talk to him or act around him.
He told me he felt terrible about what happened between us, but I disregarded it telling him it was fine. He responded with it’s wasn’t fine.
We spoke about school, work, life. Small talk. Something we never had, but I guess that’s what you have to rely on when the person you once thought so highly of doesn’t care for you anymore.
He told me he thought about me sometimes, but I knew that was a lie since I’ve heard him tell other people that before; it didn’t make me feel special.
We parted ways after hugging a few times and that feeling I once had for him was gone.
He didn’t feel like home anymore like he once did months ago. That’s when I knew I was free.
Looking back, I now understand what he meant when he once told me “you’re not my alex anymore” because in that moment he wasn’t mine anymore, and we weren’t who we once were with each other.
We were just two people, who were once close, who coincidentally ended up at the same place at different times, but crossed paths for one last time.
Does this mean I’ve let go or am I officially accepting the fact that we were just never meant to be?