This is me. This is me when I feel okey. When I feel that I have energy to do something. There are days when i don’t wanna go up from bed. My mind wants to, but my body says no. I usually go back to sleep. 14hours of sleep.. Normal? No, don’t think so. That’s pretty much all my days off.
I worked so much last year so I’ve got palpitations, I was so stressed out so I got sick..... I Have a lot of anxiety. I dream nightmares almost everyday and the doctors says I have a hard time to separate dreams from reality, specially feelings. So if something horrible happened in my dream, that feeling stays almost the whole day and I feel a pressure over my chest from this horrible thing that never happened. Normal? No Don’t think so.
I have had my best friend, Molle the cat, staying with me for two months now. I’m down, I don’t have any energy or will to do anything else than go straight from work home to him and just hug him for hours and then go to bed. I feel so indifferent to everyone and everything else around me. My friend is sick. No veterinarian knows what’s wrong and we have now went to a animal hospital instead and they too don’t know what’s wrong. But he is my best friend. My baby. I’ll fight for him and money is just money. A life is a life and can not be replaced. •
I usually love Instagram posts and to do something. But since I’ve got sick, as we say in Sweden, I hit the wall from working to much. Since that I have no energy, no motivation, a lot of anxiety that pushes me to the bottom. Low self esteem... no post is good enough or as good as all the others. Tiered. All the time. Today I wanted to go to bed at 6pm... but I have so much to do and plan because I’ll fly to Thailand for 3 weeks tomorrow. I hope that some sun will make my energy come back.
So this is me. I’m not normal.. but who is? We all fights with something. I wanted you to know this because I have not posted anything in so long and I have no motivation to either. I want to do it when it’s fun and not because I have to. Not to make it another stress factor. I hope you’ll understand that and still respect and support me. I hope you all remembers that I’m a human being just like you 💜