(*Edit: it's too complicated to add the missing words in this post, I'm sorry 🙋🏻) I am not white. I am not male. I love everyone. My narrative is my own that some/most assume they know or believe to understand. There are few who actually do.
Still, every part of my being, my identity, and my life choices have been made vulnerable not just by the ignorant, the dramatic, the cynical and those drawn to the negative but (sadly) even by those that claim to possess a certain higher political/moral ground (allies) and by peoples close to me:
I am judged on and/or dismissed on what is assumed to be my orientation and/or my abilities and/or ethnicity and/or language and/or politics; I am judged and instructed on how to be a ‘real feminist’ - even at the hands of feminists*; I continue to be coached on racism by (strictly) white people, which.never.ends**; I am judged and schooled by all kinds of peoples on their idea of appropriate ways to think and behave in the world; I continue to be educated by males on how to behave as a ‘proper female’; I've experienced extreme violence, hate, verbal abuse, sexual abuse at the hands of trusted peoples and strangers; as a person who plays music, I have lost friendships and experienced prejudice, dismissive behavior, condescension, verbal abuse, sexism because of competitive mindsets and based on what is assumed to be my abilities, gender, knowledge and the type of music I play etc.; my good deeds were dismissed because they were not good enough; as a person working in the service industry for about 15 years, I have experienced some of the most abhorrent situations that include most of what was just mentioned and more; with that I've witnessed people dear to me to complete strangers endure similar/the same types of marginalization, judgment, authoritarianism, prejudice, violence, cast shadows and negativity.
Regardless of who one is, what one does for a living, what one has been through and/or how well read one may be, we all need to navigate the world with a little more patience and care. With a little more respect.