This is one of the most important essays I’ve written, especially about #recovery and the #soberlife. I was reminded of it this weekend when talking about my anxiety and how it related to my alcoholism during my “Saturday Scaries” takeover for @thetemper.
Here’s the truth: My ambition, anxiety and alcoholism didn’t get along. My ambition and anxiety fueled one another until it got to the point that the only way I could quiet them was with alcohol. I didn’t know I had anxiety at the time and I didn’t know that there was something ELSE that I could do besides get black-out drunk to “turn off my brain .”
Since I quit drinking, I’ve had to deal with my mental health and every day is a journey in improving it and doing what’s best for me. It’s sometimes difficult, sometimes easier. I’ve learned strategies for taking care of my anxiety and sometimes have to re-learn them. It’s hard to put some of them into practice and I’ll admit that I sometimes lean on emotional eating as a coping mechanism — which as far as I’m concerned, isn’t any better than using alcohol as a coping mechanism. But I’m learning and I’m growing and I’m moving forward *without* alcohol.
Probably one of the worst things I heard back then was the whole “you deserve a drink after a long day” thing... Well, we don’t. We deserve better working conditions, more work/life balance, treatment for mental health... but we do not “deserve” alcohol as a “treat” for overworking ourselves. It’s precisely this kind of thinking that led to my ambition and anxiety going into overdrive and ultimately costing me my dream job. It wasn’t just that I was an addict, it was that I was hearing the wrong message.
Read more about how my ambition, anxiety, and alcoholism affected my life — and how I eventually got out of this cycle and sought help. #linkinbio #linkinprofile .
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