#throwbackthursday to the teen years and my beloved pet and running partner, Buster.
Even for the best of us, the teen years can be challenging and confusing. Imagine being a foundling and having no idea where you came from and what clan you biologically belong to. Imagine being at an age whereas you realize what this word "abandoned" means, and yet, you are expending great energy to know where you fit in, and who you are.
My running time with Buster was my outlet. My frustration, confusion and anger hit that pavement. Depending on my mood, I would run twice a day. Buster would never disagree. He was always a willing participant and anticipated when I would look at him and say, "Run? Run?" A runner's high resulted to fend off the sadness and was a healthy way to physically express my loss. As a teenager, it was a productive way to expel my energy and ease the grief.
Today, I'm aware that not all, but a healthy percentage of adoptees and foundlings suffer from addiction (whether it is food, smoking, drinking, drugs etc.) and / or a cycle of poor life choices and impulsive behaviour. Unresolved adoption trauma is an underlying core issue that can lead to masking the pain through substance abuse or living through the lens as a victim. If you believe you’re not good (especially good enough to keep) and valuable, then you’ll behave accordingly. You’ll make choices to hurt and devalue yourself. Adoption is associated with both positive and negative outcomes. Like so much in life, it’s not either / or. It's both / and. Without recognizing that the two worlds can breathe at once, is to believe that an adoptees feelings are not valid or worthy to express.
Thank-you, Buster for taking me on the right path, literally. I didn't know then, but I know today that I needed you desperately.
FOR THE COMPLETE, FACT BASED STORY: www.withgreatabandon.com After 21+ years of searching, I found 4 half-siblings who were also abandoned as babies by the same mother. I found our biological mother and my biological father, Emil. I'm currently searching for one more abandoned half-sibling. #adopted #adoptee #abandoned #princerupert #search #foundling #dogslove #bostonterrier