Can I be real with you all for a moment? I've recently had a number of people reach out to me saying things like, "you are KILLIN the game!" And "I don't know how you do it!" Let me start by saying most days I don't know how I do it either. Some days I feel like super mom others I wake up hoping the past few years was just a dream. Some days all I want to do is cuddle up with my little man. Others I just want to run and hide away forever.
Being a mother was never something I envisioned for myself. Being a single* mother was definitely not in the plan either. And yet here I am. Mother to a beautiful, rambunctious, extremely intelligent and curious 18mo little boy. Full time single mom. Full time college student. Part time yoga teacher. Part time 25yo young woman.
There are days where nothing gets done. Dishes pile up, toys strewn across the house, laundry spilling over the basket. Days where my energy and motivation is unparalleled and I am getting.shit.done. Days where I drop my son off in the kids academy at work so i can get some homework done or just to get 2 hours of time to myself.
The point is being a parent is the hardest, most thankless, sacrificial job you will ever have. It is also the most rewarding, fucking amazing opportunity you will ever have. And the trick, for me, is to take the ups with the downs. To take the time to recharge and center myself so I can be present for my son. To let myself be mad or sad or frustrated without getting stuck there so I can be just as joyous, excited, and filled up. To know that everything is impermanent and to feel gratitude in all of the moments and whatever reactions they stir up.