Grief comes in many forms... And shows us versions of ourselves that we never knew existed or pray we never had to explore....
From the way we love ourselves, value ourselves... abuse ourselves, and the way we’re forced to pick ourselves back up again and continue on, bare boned, broken hearted, bearing scars and all.
Most may never endure. Most will never understand. Most will never see how hard you fight to make it through each day. They don’t know your growth... they don’t know how many times you’ve back tracked and how hard you struggle to make progress... that at times you’ve lost your will, you’ve lost your way. Loss of sleep, loss of interest. Binging on tears and nightmares. Swallowed by waves of sadness, hands that shake, anxiety driven... And It’s not their job to... But its also not your job to make them see, to prove to them that you are trying, to prove to them that you still care (about yourself), to explain to them how bad it hurts and how much you want to throw in the towel knowing, even though you’re not who you were, that’s not who you ARE... So you learn to live with it, to cry quieter, to keep it hidden, to endure it, to deny it, and in the end to accept it... The journey you live and lead alone requires the validation and acknowledgement of no one but you and you alone.
And though speaking releases but a fraction, writing makes it more a reality... Finding comfort in solidarity is where you’re doing your best to find yourself again. To learn to dream at night and wake up with a love for mornings once again.
#StillBlessedInPain #NotAshamed #SpeakYourTruth #VulnerabilityIsBeautiful #WorkInProgress