I received an email from a follower a few days ago asking me if I would speak openly to how I'm handling the latest displays of white supremacy & violence happening right now. but honestly, I'm tired - tired of talking about this, thinking about this, processing this. it's old & boring & the emotional labor it requires is exhausting & stealing my vitality/sanity.
i'd rather talk about other things instead - like how my houseplants are thriving & helping to make me feel insulated from the nonsense happening outside my window. i'd rather talk about how excited/nervous I am to dance sensually tonight for a friend's sex-positive variety show. i'd rather talk about how my clients are doing some amazing, important, courageous work in healing their sexual inhibitions & becoming erotically whole after years of suppression. i'd rather talk about how I'm going to be turning 30 in less than a month & the many feelings I'm having about leaving my 20s. i'd rather talk about my skincare regimen. i'd rather talk about the book I'm reading. i'd rather talk about how I'm trying to get back into therapy again after a three year hiatus. i'd rather talk about the ways I am trying to soften, recharge, find grounding during this pivotal time of movement & change.
if you really want to know my thoughts/feelings regarding the unabashed uprising of white supremacy & racism in America, read one of the dozens of essays that have been written by black women about this in the last week. their sentiments of exhaustion, of fear, of rage reflect my own.
#selfportrait #blackgirlinflora #radicalsoftnessasaweapon