Almost daily I get asked some sort of question that makes me painfully aware of the absence of the baby we lost.
"Is he your only child?"
"About time for number two, huh?"
"Why don't you give him a little brother or sister?"
Before miscarrying I heard friends talk about the sting that questions like these would cause. Many of them explained that sometimes they just wanted to scream, or burst into tears, or punch someone when they were asked.
So when we lost our babe, I knew these moments would be on their way, and I decided in advance how I would handle them. Over the past few months, I've made a habit of answering honestly.
"We actually lost a little one in the womb this summer. Our second would be due in about a week. We're hopeful for more but we trust God's plan for our family."
Beyond the fact that I am just an open person, there are four reasons I answer this way:
1. To validate the life of our little one, and little unborn babies everywhere.
2. To guard against bitterness or self pity because I feel "unknown."
3. To raise awareness for miscarriage.
4. Because sharing our suffering is an opportunity to share our faith.
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