#30dod

MOST RECENT

Last week marked 1 year since I gave up lifting weights and decided just to dance instead.
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At the time I was terrified of gaining weight. I had been lifting weights with increasing intensity for 5+ years and had become obsessed with needing to workout hard to feel good about myself and my body.
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My relationship to the gym was not a healthy one.
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When the time came to give up the constant pushing to be stronger, fitter, leaner, and better I felt like I was giving up.
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I had so much anxiety and fear but somehow knew if I could get through the shock there would be a gift on the other side.
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So when my alarm went off at 6am on my first morning not going to the gym I got up, got dressed and stood on my front porch staring at the road. "What now?"
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I knew I still needed to move but nothing felt satisfying if I wasnt "crushing weights" or killing myself on the step mill.
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So I decided to do an experiment (mostly bc I was freaking out).
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I would go to the park every single morning and sit on a bench.
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That was my only guideline to begin with.
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I would close my eyes and ask my body what it needed most.
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Then, I would follow her.
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Some days I did jumping jacks.
Some days I danced.
Some days I just laid in the grass staring at the sky.
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Some days I felt like I didnt do enough and got really down on myself about it.
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Other days I felt deeply nourished and content with my new found practice.
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Now that its been a whole year I can say that I made the right choice for me at that time.
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I needed to de-intensify my life and start listening more to the whispers my body was telling me.
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I needed to workout from a place of love for myself instead of fear of gaining weight.
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I now feel free to do whatever my body wants as my daily movement.
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I no longer have to workout to feel good about myself and that in and of itself is a mega shift for me.
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I can now do it just because it feels good.
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I am even actually excited about lifting weights again now that I have no inner narrative about it.
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Its funny how much can change in a year.
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How you can come full circle back to where you started yet have come to know yourself so much deeper along the way.

WHY SO SERIOUS?//
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Man oh man can I ever get SERIOUS sometimes.
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Wowza.
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Don't get me wrong, I love going deep, finding the bliss in the blister and all that jazz...
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But sometimes a girls gotta blow the cap off all that intensity and let her wildness free flow in FUN.
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I can see my inner 5 year old jamming like its 1991 here.
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She was a wild child then and apparently has still got it.
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Jump on your bed today. Jump for joy. I dare you.
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Let your child lose her mind and play like she hasnt in awhile.
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#body #artwork #creativity #dance #dancersofig #dancer #30dod #innerchild #joy #play #laugh
#30daysofdance #videogram #awesomevideo #myvideo #instav #videooninstagram #5rhythms #ecstaticdance #instamood #video #videoclip #videooftheday #instagramvideos #instavideo #instagood #videostar #instagramvideo #videos

SHHHHHH////
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When the music's pumping...
When your heart is pumping...
When the world is pumping all around you...
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Can you tune in?
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Do you have the ability to slow down and listen?
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To hear through the noise?
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Even in the loudness
The thumping
The burning of your ears
Can you really listen?
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If so, what do you hear?
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A whisper to chill?
A yell to STOP?
A plea to "not do this anymore"?
A desperate cry for love and attention?
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What's your body have to say?
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It's wiser then you think
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If you learn to listen through the loudness
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You just might hear exactly what you've needed to for a long long time
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#body #artwork #creative #dance #dancersofig #dancer #30dod #dancevideo
#30daysofdance #videogram #awesomevideo #myvideo #instav #videooninstagram #instamood #video #videoclip #videooftheday #instagramvideos #instavideo #instagood #videostar #instagramvideo #videos

BODIES// .
Bodies are weird
They do weird things
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I've spent the better part of my life trying to understand why they do what they do when they do it (insert chronic illness here)
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And the more I explore
The less makes sense to me
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Why do we get infections?
Injuries?
Pains that move around from place to place?
Why does our skin fall off?
Our eyesight go?
Our energy hit rock bottom?
Our organs stop working?
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I have no solid answers
And boy I wish I did
Yet everyone else seems to have their own genius hypothesis based on their own experiance and background about the why's and how's of these things
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After all of my many years of exploring there is only one thing I know for certain, that the body is doing it's own damn thing on its own timeline and telling it to hurry up and heal already ain't going to do shit.
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So I'm giving up my quest to understand this weird symbiotic ecosystem that I physically exist in and Im going to sit back and let it do it's thing for awhile and trust it knows what's up.
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Guide me.
Show me.
Teach me.
I'm listening.
I hear you.

#body #artwork #creative #dance #dancersofig #dancer #30dod #dancevideo
#30daysofdance #videogram #awesomevideo #myvideo #instav #videooninstagram #instamood #video #videoclip #videooftheday #instagramvideos #instavideo #instagood #videostar #instagramvideo #videos

SLEEPY// .
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You know, I've tried yoga
It's just not my jam
Feels too linear for my circular being
So this is what most mornings look like for me
Jammies
Jams
Sunlight sneaking in
And a slowly waking body

I brew myself like a pot of coffee
Mixing and gently stirring
Becoming strong enough to spark the day (Lord knows I drink tea afterwards not actually coffee
that would make me bounce off the walls)

It's this small ritual of meeting myself each morning
Wherever I am waking up
However I feel
That begins to open my heart
To the many possibilities
Of this one life I have

To move with my sleepy self
Is a great gift
To recieve

#body #artwork #creative #dance #dancersofig #dancer #30dod
#30daysofdance #videogram #awesomevideo #myvideo #instav #videooninstagram #instamood #video #videoclip #videooftheday #instagramvideos #instavideo #instagood #videostar #instagramvideo #videos

GET HIGH//
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Be so intoxicating
You get high on your own fumes
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Drunk on your rising vibrations
Moved by your own movements
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Subtly touched by each touch of your skin on itself
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Be so juicy and ripe
You ooze with sticky sweetness and passion
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Flow like the smoothness of
fresh milk poured into a thin walled glass
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Delight yourself with your slowness
Melting and dripping into the earths gentle arms
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Let your smell take you places you have never gone before
Let your body be a river of ecstasy rippling towards the great wide sea
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Get high on your own intoxicating beauty and never come down
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#bodylove #womensretreat #sexuality #womb #shakti #kundalini #liberation #bliss #manifesting #creativity #retreat
#artwork #creative #dance #dancersofig #dancer #30dod
#30daysofdance #risesisterrise #awesomevideo #myvideo #instav #videooninstagram #instamood #video #videooftheday #instagramvideos #instagramvideo #videos

It's time to be "too much"
Over the top
Too sexy
Provocative
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To say the things that no one wants to say
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It's time to let out our voices
Give no fucks
Or give fucks and scream it out anyway
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It's time to claim our sexiness for ourselves
Own it and use it to create
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To not shy away from our power
Our embodiment
In all its many expressions
Even if it scares people or maybe even scares yourself
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It's time to do the thing you keep saying you're going to do but never do or make time for
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It's time to claim what you really want and own it, right now
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It's time to open our hearts so wide we want to puke and then open them even a little bit more
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To not shy away from the intensity of love we are capable of
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But to learn to welcome in the pain that the opening may create
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It's time to say goodbye to the things that just aren't serving you, you know exactly what they are
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And to double down on the people and experiances that bring us the greatest value and deepest reflections
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It's time to find your own orbits
Your own vortex
Your own sanctuary inside yourself
To cultivate the fuck out of its energy and to ride it home
Through the dark and the light
The waves upon waves
Becoming a master of its spinning vibrations
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Oh baby
It's time

LIFEFORCE// .
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Lifeforce energy
It moves in circles
Circulating through me
My spine
Awakening the energetic highways
Connecting all the systems and harmonies of my being
Bringing life and vitality back

It spins
From the earth upwards
Toes
Feet
Tailbone
Low back
Mid back
Heart
Neck
Head

If this is so, then why do I walk in so many straight lines?
Up down
Back and forth
Side to side

My work is to remember this lifeforce is always moving all around me
Waiting for me to tap in
Fully accessible for my devouring
Reaching out to be consumed
Like an ocean wave ready to ride

It speaks to me in circles
Sweet feminine energy
Spiralizing
Giving me life back

I move with it
I let it move me
I am moved by it's power
I am moving to its flow

This was 2017
Two frames coming into focus
Two selves merging
Two becoming one with time
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Two friends falling in love
Two women helping other women love their bodies
Two continents crossed
Two homes, East and West
Two legs dancing wherever they went
Two bodies moving in Sunday ritual
Two hearts beating with blindfolds on
Two blonde Dj's making magic
Two left in our empty house
Two learning to relate, adult and child
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Two sides
The feisty yang
The flowy yin
The shadow
The light
The mother
The child
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Two friends fell out of love
Two women said goodbye
Two continents became a choice to land on one
Two legs refused to dance
Two kidneys ached with fear
Two hearts were broken
Two gave back the keys to the home that was everything
Two parts of myself always at war
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2018
I step into focus
There is clarity
There are no longer two
There is only one left
The two's have all fallen
The one that is here now is me
All parts, together
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And so
I journey on as one united being
Focused on the things that matter to me most
Ever so clear on the path ahead
Learning to love everything as it changes
All of the sides as parts of me
All of the beings and partners as allies
All of the shiftings as opportunities
All of the abundance and joy as mine to claim
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Let this year be divinely designed by the essence of my being
It's all that's left standing after a year of distillation and destruction

I must slow down to speed up.
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Speed without presence is dangerous. Like driving with a blindfold on. Potentially fatal.
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That was my life 6 months ago. Driving, driving, driving. Going faster and faster, doing more more more.
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Driving in a direction I wasn't even sure I wanted to be driving in. Going fast and hard for the sake of being more and better.
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Because I thought there was a destination to reach to be enough.
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I thought I'd better hurry if I ever wanted to be loved the way I desired.
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Until I stopped. Crashed. Well truthfully my body gave out on me. It shut down. It had had enough speed. And I was forced to pull over. To sit in the drivers seat, turn off the engine and let go of the wheel.
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Breath. Silence. Quiet. Stillness.
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Without the engine humming and the landscape passing me by in blurs, I found the car of my life at a halt on the side of the road. I was shocked by the sheer lack of awareness I had had around how recklessly I was driving.
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Here I was. Smoke steaming from the engine, in the middle of no where with no map or direction to go.
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I panicked. Desperately wanting to hit the open road again, to feel the thrill and excitement of the turning tires. Not wanting to feel what was there in the quiet slowness and aloneness of the car, but wishing to escape in any way I could.
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I battled with my mind day in and day out but my body simply would not let me move. "Let me drive" it whispered. Over and over and over. "Let me lead you."
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I let it sink in.
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"Fine. But only for 3 days. Then I'm taking back the wheel."
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"Deal."
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I laid in bed for 3 days with no agenda. I didn't take any supplements. I didn't read or write or pull tarot cards. I just allowed. Trusted my body when it spoke and let it be.
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I spoke to it. "Lead me, show me the way." No fixing. No stress. No figuring things out.
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Then as if all at once everything made sense.
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My strength returned. The flow of life opened up and the road ahead began getting clearer.
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3 days in bed taught me a lot of things. More then anything it taught me how important it is to stop, listen and let my body lead the way.
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I must slow down to speed up.
I must be present on the road.

LIKE A VIOLIN// Our bodies are like musical instruments to be played, strummed and explored.

They sing sweet melodies with touching, with passion and bring delight to all those who listen to their musical whispers.

There are endless songs to be written. Dances to be danced. Patterns of beats, rhythms and notes to come together to make art.

The brain may be the song sheet but the body makes the sound.

Listen closely. Can you hear her?
#30dod #30daysofdance #danceallday #dancelife #dancersofig #5rhythms #5R #ecstaticdance #dance #ritual #dancer #bodyart #bodyfreedom #movement #artproject

Starting a business is no joke and it’s incredibly difficult without supportive people around you who have been there before // if you’re wanting to find some direction and guidance to get your idea off the ground, look up 30 days of doing and never look back // even if you’re well established in your business, this can help you rethink about a lot and will do nothing but help! Check it out and let me know what you think 🤘🏽

All for My Babes 😍😍 @obey_dalv0 when is your birthday 💜😍but if your a Fanpage And Your Doing This Hashtag #30DoD

ENERGY// I've got a lot of it. And I claim it as mine. My energy. I get to have it how I like it. Even though it's not really mine. It just runs through me. I let it. It's ugly and pretty. Call it what you want. My body's my channel and I'm going to have my energy all the damn way. For me.

As many of you know, I’ve been working on building my own interior decorating brand and business over at @ashleymarinodesigns. The last 30 days have been transformational and inspirational working with the @30dod family to take the first steps toward making my biz a reality. If you’re wanting to start your business and have no idea how to, TAKE THE PLUNGE, join the 30dod community, and let me know when you do (we all need cheerleaders, and I’m here to be that person for you)! // TLDR; check out my biz at @ashleymarinodesigns, check out @30dod, and let’s be each other’s biggest supporters! ✨✨✨

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