Maybe she’s afraid you’ll be like all the others. Another chapter that will end in tragedy, in a devastation that swallows her whole. A slammed door when she was so hoping you’d remain open.
Maybe she’s afraid you’ll be another goodbye she isn’t prepared for.
Maybe she’s afraid to be herself. Maybe she’s lowered her walls before and seen what can happen.
Maybe she’s keeping you at a distance on purpose. It seems like she’s reserved. Because she is. She’s protecting her heart.
Maybe she’s afraid you don’t actually mean what you’re saying. She’s heard tender words that turned out to be lies. She’s been promised futures that were shattered the next day.
Maybe she’s afraid to fall for you. She can already tell how easy it would be. She’s already daydreaming about your smile or your hand on the small of her back. She can feel it happening.
Maybe she’s afraid of how intense this is going to be.
Maybe she’s afraid you’ll leave.
That she’ll come home and find you gone. Find all traces of you vanished. Your bags will be packed and you’ll never come back to see if she’s okay. You’ll never give it a second thought.
Maybe she’s just afraid. Afraid of all the possibilities, the chances she could get hurt, the likelihood that everything will blow up in her face.
But maybe, most of all, she’s afraid of how much she’s going to love you.
Because loving someone, giving all of you to a person who could walk away, is the scariest thing of them all.
Words: Kris Miller