sugercoatit sugercoatit

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Plus Fashion + Lifestyle Blog  👟Suger Coat It • Melissa Walker Horn 🖤Do no harm (take no shit) 🎱Your straight-talking interwebs BFF

http://sugercoatit.com/why-sharing-your-experience-isnt-attention-seeking/

Oh hello March! I have to admit, moving on from summer might be a nice change, this year has been HOT. And plus, March is my birthday month, I'm excited! 🖤

I'm writing the next Confident You challenge, aiming for a late March kick off, and it's certainly helping me reassess where I'm at in my year and with my plans for what I hoped to achieve. Dreams, goals and kicking ass, how could it not!!? ✔️

I left my house for work in the sevens today, which is not an ordinary day. I'm such a sleeper-in-er-a lately. So it was default items to the outfit rescue thanks to @17_sundays and my nude ankle boots from years ago that I will never let go of. Can't beat a basic, right? What do you put on when you have to be out the door fast!? Let me know in the comments, it's a big week for me, I might need your ideas. Haha. #sugersoutfit #sugersworkoutfit #questiontime

I'm got some serious breakfast envy going on over here... my coffee and bar on the go just don't seem to have cut it. Now, who's volunteering to be my personal chef and chief grocery shopper?? 💁🏼 📷 via @Rachels.fit.kitchen 😍

Preparing for a big week ahead by procrastinating, otherwise known as watching the Harry Potter movies back to back. 💁🏼 #sorrynotsorry

This guy. I'm so grateful for him and the fierce loyalty he always shows towards my family and I. Sure, he can be annoying AF sometimes, but I'm glad that 20 year old me chose him. 😍😍😍 #lovethatman #familyfirst #mrsuger

I went to write this weekend's newsletter dozens of times over the last day. It turns out that for now, I have nothing to say. It's the strangest thing as a blogger to look at a page and have no words to fill it. It used to worry me, now I figure the words will come when I have something to say, and I might as well enjoy the sunshine instead. 💁🏼 Blogger friends, what say you? #bloglife #writersblock #nothingtosay

Time to stop and recharge a bit before the weekend. I've got work coming out of my ears so this might be the only break I get. And yeah, maybe there's wine in this mug... 😉 #workworkwork #pause #sugersplace

After a sleepover with my sissie and wife it was up and out the door to breakfast this morning! Wearing my @17_sundays knot front dress over @bigwaustralia leggings with my converse. Can't argue with that for simple and effective. 💁🏼 #sugersoutfit #psblogger

In a lot of ways blogging has been the career of my life. I was interviewed recently for my local paper and we got to talking about my job and previous jobs and how the one constant has always been blogging. Funny how you wake up one day and just find where you fit, right? I'm sharing a sneak peak at my blog office, thanks to @bemestyle and their fit for you everyday jeans. What can I say, when something fits, it fits! (Excellent Segway, don't you think? I thought so, congratulations me). And for me, when it comes to everyday jeans it's all about the skinny; a tapered leg and smooth lines. Easy peasy. #bemeJeans #ad #sugersoutfit #sugersplace

When your autumn/winter wardrobe looks a lot like your summer wardrobe... but with slightly less white. Ahhh well, I'm nothing if not predictable. #sugersoutfit #aw17 #whatimwearing #psblogger

Getting out of bed this morning took some effort! There's a mid-week slump well and truly underway here. Any hot tips for how to shake it off? Assume there will be coffee involved and go from there! 😂
#savageAF #casetify

It’s been a big month for me. Lots of post sharing and commentary about my blog and the way I cover topics. I watched as my words were taken out of my hands and placed in the hands of others. That’s the scary part of visibility; you really can’t control how people see you. You can craft a persona, based on what you believe and hope is true, but you have no control over how it lands over there.
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I don’t know about you, but for me, that’s terrifying on a number of levels. .
It reminded me of the time I saw a comment on my post that a friend had shared. The comment said something along the lines of ‘I saw you share this blogger before, she always seems to be offended by something’. When that happened, it shook me up. It seems silly now, but it did. My friend defended me as someone using their voice; bless her heart. But this woman, this commenter, saw me as a complainer, a victim, someone easily offended and weak, and I didn’t want that.
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In a lot of ways, after that, I stopped sharing the things that happen to me. The situations where people vocalise or share their prejudice with or about me. I even stopped challenging their ideas so I wouldn’t be one of those deemed precious, high maintenance or demanding. You know, a delicate little snowflake. .
I talked about clothes but not why it’s hard to find them after you reach a certain size. On the blog I shared outfits but not that my inbox was often full of unwanted sexual advances or a barrage of harsh words. Just because I had the nerve to exist. I stopped talking about the conversations that people felt comfortable having my body. Sharing them with you as if to say, I know, I get it too, let’s ALL not listen. I stopped it all; I pulled the gate closed and said, no thanks.
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But big surprise, they didn’t go away. {read more on the blog now}