santuur santuur

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Santuur Project  Santuur Ltd is an organisation that focuses on supporting somali's living with mental health problems in the UK.

http://www.santuur.com/

Working hard and excited about our upcoming plans! If you would like to volunteer and get involved, get in touch with us at info@santuur.com#santuur #mentalhealthawareness #endthestigma #timetotalk

"Ocean of Depression" [2/2] They only see normal, but manic
Had me, had me at gunpoint,
Controlling my soul like a puppet,
Pulling the strings to keep me buzy,
Pulling the strings through my mind,
Through my soul, it was fun
Excitement that I never felt, danger that
I tasted, now it was
Heavy drop, falling into the ocean
Ocean of depression
Looking for another racing soul
Souls amongst the dead

Forgetting me, screaming
On this cloud, looking
For balance, looking for peace
But beg a deaf cloud
That’s the joke of the century
Plead with blind cloud
It can’t see you
It can’t hear
Only shaking
Throwing you
Your mind, your body, your soul
Into the ocean of depression.

Yesterday was the wall
Punching it to
Be normal, today was the cloud
Screaming at it, I screamed
Stop, stop
To find balance, stop to think
Stop to be normal and focus
But wall has no soul,
Cloud has no ears
No eyes
Handing me
To my master

Master of tomorrow, the ocean of depression
Chasing me from my family
Chasing my from my friends,
They only saw emotional kid,
Emotional teenager, never seeing the
Rising water, battling the normal
Raising their swords
In the battle of insanity
Cracking my life
Breaking the walls of my world

Whispering the past into my ear
Filling my heart with poison
Of paranoia, turning a joke
Into hate, love into hate,
Respect into anger, laughter into
Tears, invisible ropes
Tightening, water becoming
Dark, ghost swimming underneath,
Is it after me? Can’t anyone see?

They only see what they know
Not seeing my soul
Drowning, my brain trying to float,
Darkness winning, insanity in the lead,
As I scream
Help
I am drowning in the sea of depression

If you would like to share your story, thoughts or poems, please send us a message or email us at info@santuur.com
Join us in our plight to end stigma and promote good mental health through raising awareness!
#santuurstories #santuur #mentalhealth #endthestigma #timetotalk #mentalhealthawareness #bipolardisorder
#poetry

"Ocean of Depression" [1/2]

The cloud has stopped, rain is coming
More clouds are coming, thunder is near
Shattering the skies, shaking the cloud,
Shaking my balance, snatching my
Manic, turning into a rain, my smile
Is that drop, my mind is that drop,
My smile is that drop, drop after
Drop,

Manic waves goodbye, it was dangerous
Exciting, a burning road, filled with
Funny thorns, piercing my mind,
Tearing my legs, but distracting me
Distracting me with the next thing,
Distracting me with the next laugh,
Distracting me with the next project,
Distracting me with excitement, my mind
Bleeding, words running, heart racing,
They only see normal, but manic
Had me, had me at gunpoint,
Controlling my soul like a puppet,
Pulling the strings to keep me buzy,
Pulling the strings through my mind,
Through my soul, it was fun
Excitement that I never felt, danger that
I tasted, now it was
Heavy drop, falling into the ocean
Ocean of depression
Looking for another racing soul
Souls amongst the dead #santuurstories #santuur #mentalhealth #endthestigma #timetotalk #mentalhealthawareness #bipolardisorder
#poetry

A poem about bipolar disorder:

I was normal, the penny dropped
My mind fled, the emotions evaporated
And I was locked in. Locked in a house
Of happiness, a house in heaven,
A house but not a house
But a cell in the depths of mind

That stretched my smile, playing on my mind. Showing a happy world, but too
Much of something, isn’t that dangerous
I couldn’t think, my words were racing
My thoughts were running, a shadow
Was after me, was it mine
Or my insanity.

I couldn’t think, I was restless
Trying to escape this happy cell, looking for reality, searching for the truth
Of who was chasing me?
How could I think? When
The walls are bright, the windows
Are sunny, the weather is happy,
The sun is running, running
But where is it going?
I couldn’t think, my mind was escaping
Looking for life, searching for the ground
To see who was chasing me,
And jump of this cloud,
And get out of this room,
It wasn’t a room
But a happy cell.
Who makes happy cell?

I got on my knees, covered my thoughts
Raised my hands to God, praying
Praying to escape this fast world,
Exciting and dangerous
When your thinking,
But annoying
When it steals your sleep.

Annoyed and angry, I prayed
I prayed to see who was chasing me
I prayed to see the exit
I prayed to wake up
And feel the ground
So I can catch the shadow after me. If you would like to share your story, thoughts or poems, please send us a message or email us at info@santuur.com
Join us in our plight to end stigma and promote good mental health through raising awareness!
#santuurstories #santuur #mentalhealth #endthestigma #timetotalk #mentalhealthawareness #bipolardisorder
#poetry

"Learning to give up the self-blame and hatred was the first step to recovery."
Experiencing depression (2/2): "The initial counselling assessment at university was awful. The assessor was an unsympathetic male who upfront asked me what the problem was. He was hostile and intimidating which left me in tears. I could not tell him the truth and made something up about struggling with uni work. I completed a form where I indicated that I wanted a female counsellor. Counselling was the first time that I was able to talk through the most painful secret of my life. I was limited to six sessions - would six sessions be enough to unravel years of pain and abuse? The sessions were too focused on finding solutions to address the symptoms and sometimes I felt patronised by the counsellor's suggestions. My counsellor struggled to understand my culture and religious beliefs but the sessions taught me not to blame myself. Learning to give up the self-blame and hatred was the first step to recovery.
Looking back, I feel angry my former teachers did not refer me to counselling. So many knew of the situation I was in but chose not to seek proper help for me. After my six sessions were up, the counsellor referred me to a specialised centre for people who had been through my experiences but I never went. I got through my darkest periods in the end. I occasionally relapse and have those bad weeks where I slip into the same patterns but mostly I am doing ok." If you would like to share your story, thoughts or poems, please send us a message or email us at info@santuur.com
Join us in our plight to end stigma and promote good mental health through raising awareness!
#santuurstories #santuur #mentalhealth #endthestigma #timetotalk #mentalhealthawareness #depression #university #student #counselling #religion #spirituality #recovery

"It was only at night that I was free to cry." Experiencing depression (1/2): "My time at university was drenched with depression that had developed a few years before and each day was painful. My mornings started trying to lift this invisible boulder off that was holding me hostage to my bed. Another morning meant another day that I was still alive to go through this hell. Getting out of bed was an achievement in itself for me because I know the struggle to get to that stage. You can sit with so many people but still be completely alone. Physically present but psychologically miles away. I could not focus on anything. My thoughts were stuck in a vicious cycle that I could not escape from. Breathing hurt because I didn’t want to breathe anymore. Pretending to be happy all day to my family and friends was incredibly draining and I desperately sought moments of solace to uncage the burning tears which stung my soul. It was only at night that I was free to cry.
Other people didn't understand. They want you to snap out of it. They question your emotions and even blame you. You’re surrounded by this dark cloud only you can feel. When you try and explain how you feel it is like a broken record stuck on repeat, you churn out the same hurt and want to stop speaking. I started to binge on junk to cope and hated the person I had become. My friendships were being ruined by my depression and I felt I was boring my friends... I lived two lives; on the surface I was an average, happy student but inside I existed in a world where I prayed daily that I would get hit by a bus and the pain would stop. I eventually broke down during a meeting and was referred to counselling." #santuurstories #santuur #depression #mentalhealth #timetotalk #university #studentmentalhealth #counselling #wellbeing

This poem is about the angry face of bipolar.

The morning is new, the day is fresh
My heart is cold, my body is shivering
My blood is boiling, and I want to do
One thing. Punch that wall.
Punch that wall to forget yesterday
Punch that wall to clean the sadness
Punch that wall to beat pain
Punch that wall to meet
The human who smiles
The human who never worries,

But a dream is for the normal
Reality is for the poor
Cracking my fists,
Smashing the brick,
Tearing the paint off,
But a wall never listens,
A wall only stands
Wanting to help
But never has the soul to help
Wanting to blow the sadness away
But never has the arms to act,

But listening is for those
Who know tomorrow,
Live today,
Never worrying about next week,
I continue punching,

I punch to find normal
I punch to take a joke
I punch to smile
I punch to fix
The broken brain
The possessed emotions,

But a thousand punches
Will never break him
That ugly truth
Waiting for me
Questioning tomorrow
Painting HE IS CRAZY on the universe.
Showing me smile is expensive
Laughter is priceless
And normal is never on the menu.

You too can send us your stories, poems and thoughts too via Instagram or email info@santuur.com !
Join us in our plight to end stigma and promote good mental health through raising awareness!

#SantuurStories#santuur#mentalhealth#anonymous#stories#share#somalis#wellbeing#BipolarAwareness#physical#mental#emotional#health#bipolar#mindshare#poem#appreciation#talent#amazingminds#amazingstories#inspiringothers

Please do not give up ! You still have fight in you ! I believe in you ! Now you need to start believing in yourself .

Don't hide away from the truth . Don't surround yourself with negative memories and thoughts. Don't push away the people who love you most . Don't live to regret a decision you made during a moment of impulsivity .
Every life test is unique but you are not alone ! You are loved ! You are respected ! You are appreciated ! You are needed ! Your recovery is key ! Believe that you can and you are already half way there ! Practice the art of Hope ! To new beginnings !
#RecoveryTree #TreeOfHope #Growth #Healing #RecoveryPlan #Health #Rehabilitation #Repair #Restoration #Cultivate #Transform #Revive #Return #Develop #Renew #Achieve #Cure #Recover

Did you know that 75% of mental illnesses start before the age of 18? Today marks the start of @_place2be 's Children's Mental Health Week! This week, let's all work together to #spreadalittlekindness 😊 #childrensmhw #mentalhealthmatters #santuur

Mental health is not something to be ashamed of .... Don't suffer in silence. Speak to someone.

#timetotalk #santuur

Part 2 "I want to tell her, I want to
Explain, I want to sing it,
I want to recite it, but I can’t
I can’t tell a mother, your
Son is not your son, your son
Is flesh, body but brainless, your
Son is there, but he is possessed
By forces of unseen.
I want to apologise for being
A dead walking human, I want to apologise
For seeing the world as an angry
Bird, I want to apologise for
Running from them, shadows
Of the unknown, voices dancing
Teasing and taunting up there, but how?
I am brainless,
I have a brain, but it’s not mine,
I have a brain, but I pay rent,
I have a brain, but
It never obeys the master.

What do you do
When your in the cracks of the earth?
Do you pray? Do you cry? Or fight
To be human for another day.

Smiling like an angel
She leaves, closing the door
She is proud, her son
The pride of her name, apple of her eye
Is finishing school, about to conquer earth
But little does she know?
I am there, but not
There, the
Sympathetic cosy duvet
Hugs me, saying
It’s the will of the lord

The will of the lord,
What lord? One that left
You, dangling from
Branches of insanity
They mock,
Boiling my blood,
As anger tears
My veins apart, ready
For vengeance.
They have my brain
But mock my religion
How dare they? ‘You have ten minutes,’
She calls out,
My mother, but
Moving, getting
Out of bed, only
The lord can help me.
Ding, time calls me,
Bed is restless, duvet
Is relentless, they all want me out,
Throw out the ghost, the they chant,
But how do I move?
Am living but am brainless." #SantuurStories#santuur#mentalhealth#anonymous#stories#share#somalis#wellbeing#BipolarAwareness#physical#mental#emotional#health#bipolar#mindshare#poem#appreciation#talent#amazingminds#amazingstories#inspiringothers
You can also send us your stories , poems and thoughts too via Instagram or email info@santuur.com !
Join us in our plight to end stigma and promote mental health through raising awareness !

This poem is called the ' Brainless '

Part 1. "The air is cold, the wind
Howls, the time screams, the
Earth breathes, a life is leaving
A soul is losing, a mind is fleeing,
Something is happening, death
Is beating insanity, or God is
Defeating satan, but I can’t feel it,
I can’t feel it.
My heart pumps,
My blood boils, my soul
My soul, do I
Have a soul? Do
I have soul? God.

The minutes are turning,
Morning is leaving, night
Is late, or is it me,
Unable to feel human,
Spitting out oxygen

cursing
My pillow, why doesn’t it
Scream? Why? I sleep on
It every night, every day,
Or has it forgotten what pain is?

There is mum
Rushing in, with a smile
For a face, love
On her eyes, care on her lips,
And motherhood on her swagger,
‘Your late for school,’ she reminds
Me, opening the dry wailing
Curtains, they can see my
Pain, fighting to keep
My brain, but for her,
Love is the answer
And care is the medicine.
But my brain is packing, my soul
Is angry.
Cells are evacuating,

Blood is rushing, because typhoon
Of insanity is coming." #SantuurStories#santuur#mentalhealth#anonymous#stories#share#somalis#wellbeing#BipolarAwareness#physical#mental#emotional#health#bipolar#mindshare#poem#appreciation#talent#amazingminds#amazingstories#inspiringothers
You can also send us your stories , poems and thoughts too via Instagram or email info@santuur.com !
Join us in our plight to end stigma and promote mental health through raising awareness !

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