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Julie D. O'Rourke  Mail to: Julie.d.orourke@gmail.com 💥Please do not use photos without permission unless tagged💥 Find some duds: @rudyjudeco

https://mobile.nytimes.com/2017/09/19/t-magazine/design/anthony-esteves-soot-house.html

When you get your haircut and your kid says "I like it. Your hair. Let's picture." Then he looks like a shmo but you look like an angel, you go ahead and post it.

Cute/casual meeting by the fridge, laughing over a bowl of greens in our exceptionally clean house. This is how you guys think of us, right? Oh man these pics from @gretarybus for @tmagazine are my fave, this may just turn in to her feed. Sorry/not sorry.

Only @gretarybus can capture this kind of joy

My AMAZING partner @tonejabrone is featured in not one but TWO @tmagazine articles this week. Holy. Shit. Link in profile! Photo @gretarybus

This is one of thousands of photos that Diogo has asked me to take of him spinning, followed by "I want see", followed by "again" followed by a thousand more pictures. Never satisfied.

I literally had the best week of my life with these beautiful people, even with popping my jaw out of socket while eating pizza at the rehearsal dinner and stepping on TWO sea urchins during our pre wedding swim. It was THAT good, you guys. Nothing could get me down. Love you @bharrisonbryant & @_missen_ thank you for including us it such a righteous week.

Trying to sneak into the sauna with all the grown ups.

If you want to know exactly what not to pack for a wedding, have your toddler pack their own suitcase. Diogo is bringing a helmet and his "cell phone" which is actually just the battery pack that comes with the suitcase. By the way @away is making KIDS carry ons now, and they're perfect. Literally perfect.

Being a mom is really about knowing that no matter where you are going you're probably being followed by one to two people. In my case they're very cute people, but still.

He's very outdoorsy.

I can't even begin to thank you for the outpouring of love and support as we go through this. I've read each and every comment and each one has made it abundantly clear how amazing and resilient we all are, how so many of us can go through such trauma, such deep dark feelings, and come out the other side stronger and ready to try again and again or decide that we don't want to try anymore and find peace there too. Im so lucky to have this little face to look at, my family and friends close by to squeeze me, and all of you to lift me above the dark feelings and to remind me that I'm not alone. Thank you, friends ✌🏼.

This is the hardest post to write, I actually don't even know what I'm going to say, but my instinct was to tell everyone immediately (maybe so it resonates with me more deeply, maybe because I'm scared of saying it out loud) but we had a miscarriage. Or to be more exact we're waiting to miscarry our baby, which is the most crazy/helpless/hopeless feeling I've ever experienced. It's been a really long time since I've felt such depths of sadness, but honestly it's feels so reassuring to know that I can literally scream this from the rooftops and all of you will hear. I know so many people go through this silently so I hope this echoes off the wall for someone somewhere that this is happening, and I'm sad, and I feel hopeless but I'm still here, and you are too. The universe will shake itself out, and we will be better for it. (Also this is not a weird miscarriage portrait, just a moody regular portrait from a few weeks ago..)

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