Instagram post by @wanderingwithmary Mary McLeod

This past weekend, @ifgathering was hosted here in Jinja. I prayed for God to reveal just one thing to my heart. I have felt it numbing up over the last week or so...waiting does that to me for some reason. But I’ll tell you what...I felt way more than one thing. I felt more than I have in a long time! The waterworks were overflowing and my heart was bursting with joy. A lot of goodness was said but one of the things I took from it was the prompt to declare two people you felt in your heart you needed to disciple this year. The answer for me was so easy...the girls in this picture. I have felt this whole past year to sit still and lean in towards my family. You might be thinking...”wait, do you not do that already?”. The thing is, I have always been really good at putting friends and even strangers first before anything. I have overextended myself and in some really unhealthy Type 2 moments, said yes to things just to feel loved in return. Family is a newer concept to me. Two years ago I became a first time mother to a pretty independent four year old. Continuing to pour into friends happened naturally as I learned how to juggle this new season of family. The thing is, I was pouring out of an empty cup and I wasn’t focusing on the people right in front of me. Co-dependent relationships were developed and my self worth was found in being the person my people needed and called first. It became pretty evident early this year that I needed to reevaluate my priorities and the people who needed me the most were under my same roof. It’s been an uncomfortable season to navigate as I have 28 years operating differently but I can already tell that things are balancing out in a more healthy way. My girls can depend on me. They know they can run to me. I’m at every bath time and can keep an evening routine longer than 1 day every other week. Our bond is growing stronger and grace is being extended in so many different ways. They know I am here for them...to help guide them through the trials of life as well as celebrating the wins. Frankly, to know they are here for me too unconditionally feels like a gift straight from heaven. This is something I have always prayed for 🙌🏻

17 Comments

  • 13w ago emhope1216 emhope1216

    Yes!!! We have been in this season of “family first and sometimes only” since October and it can be so tough but soooooo freeing

  • 13w ago coriklecknerphotography coriklecknerphotography

    Cutest thing I’ve ever seen

  • 13w ago kellyvia kellyvia

    I love this Mary.

  • 13w ago lisathelymecoach lisathelymecoach

    i think a lot of times codependancy develops from a sincere desire to serve others well. it’s a fine line and hard lesson. i appreciated your words!

  • 13w ago shineuganda shineuganda

    I love this and am so proud of you. Such a healthy step. May God continue to fuel this desire and may you & your family reap more blessings than you can imagine from this yes to Him. ❤️

  • 13w ago letlovegrow letlovegrow

    @shineuganda that’s 👆🏽me 🙈😂

  • 13w ago upwardlydependent upwardlydependent

    Mary, this is so good. I see the incredible qualities the 2 in you brings out, and the friendship part of your strengths skill set is sooooo strong! I resonate so much with this growing into motherhood, and I’m standing with you in the commitment to disciple my kids well first. ❤️

  • 13w ago valnun123 valnun123

    Beautiful prayers and words and family xo

  • 13w ago ashersinge ashersinge

    Yep! Same same. Your words resonate with me as well! You do a beautiful job of pouring into your family.

  • 13w ago heycaseyjames heycaseyjames

    Um that tub is perfection. Also I love this.

  • 13w ago elizabeth.j.w.spencer elizabeth.j.w.spencer

    This is so good! Thanks for sharing

  • 13w ago thetiniesthomestead thetiniesthomestead

    I love this. 💞 I’m so grateful for your words; lately I’ve been feeling this, but haven’t been able to pin down the idea. I’ve been feeling this nag to teach my babies. I don’t know why the word disciple didn’t come to me sooner- but it’s exactly what I need to do.

  • 13w ago andololly7 andololly7

    ❤️

  • 13w ago meganmccurry meganmccurry

    Wow so beautiful! Thanks for sharing. I was at IF here in Austin and I’ll be traveling with them to Rwanda in 2 weeks ✨

  • 13w ago karisegner karisegner

    Love this so much Mary, and love your heart and honesty.

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