'Body of Truth' by @harrietnbrown was an incredibly illuminating book for me (thanks for the recommendation @fyeahmfabello !!!). As someone who worked as a trainer for a decade (and has struggled with my own body image), I would highly recommend reading this book instead of the next diet or workout program you might be thinking about reading. "Now, more than a decade later, after three pregnancies and a whole lot of living, I just can't seem to do it anymore. So I sit in the chair, leaking tears of self-pity, and wait for the therapist to break out the Kleenex and reassure me that yes, it's OK, she'll help me lose weight, we will take care of this together... 'What if you were OK with your body the way it is right now?' she asks.
I stare at her. What I *want* to say is "Are you fucking nuts?" I mean, that's why I'm here, because I'm *not* OK with it. Does she want me to have a heart attack or stroke or get diabetes because I'm too fat? Does she know how much time I've wasted crying in front of the mirror? Does she think I want to *look like her* for the rest of my life?
Of *course* I never considered the possibility of being OK with this body. This unacceptable body. And I'm not *going* to consider it. That would be letting myself go, as my grandmother used to say, shaking her head, about any woman who had gained a few pounds. Even as a child I knew what she meant: they'd stopped caring about themselves. And now they deserved exactly what they got from my grandmother and every other woman in their social circle- censure, gossip, and pity... I consider leaving now, mid-session, and never coming back. But something keeps me in the chair. I have the sense that if I walk out, I'll be missing something big, something important... But her words stay with me. They haunt me as I brush my teeth and talk to my daughters and put dinner on the table. I'm in my late thirties, and it's actually never occurred to me before that some people might be OK with not being thin. Some *women*. It's as if her words revealed a huge blind spot in my vision, one I didn't know I had." #McGReads