Attention @hodalasally - You and your ding-dong Seattle renob friends were so easily distracted by riding around town in Portland with your little pajama suits on that you left the back door to Seattle open. Under cover of darkness Friday evening this badass crew of elite pinball warriors and I took your precious backwater village in the name of PDX. We've renamed this dump Little Boston (look it up Portland history majors) and we are making immediate changes now that we are in charge.
1- Starbucks drinks are now Small, Medium, and Large.
2- Henceforth, no one shall refer to themselves or any other Seattle renob as the "12th Man" with regard to the Seahawks. You guys have that much of an ego?!? It's akin to people who create pseudo "teams" for cyclocross and produce all sorts of kit, websites, and brand collateral around their "racing culture squad". It's not super. So, relax.
3- The people of Seattle will immediately submit a written apology to the world for putting a Sonics jersey on Patrick Ewing. (Is there anything more to this place than corporate coffee and unknown sports teams?) #sscxwcpdx16 #renobisbonerspelledbackward