jsjanzen jsjanzen

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Jessica Janzen (Olstad)  Saved by Grace | wife to @chachissandwiches | mom to Swayzie & Lewiston who is dancing in Heaven | @lagreeyyc & @onecyclespin @hotyogaspin

http://www.loveforlewiston.ca/

BAGGAGE // It's not the load that breaks you down. It's the way you carry it. - Lou Holtz {How crazy is it that this is me leaving my house on the regular. Seriously that many bags. } ....This quote is off of @joannagaines page - it really spoke to me. Read it again. IT'S THE WAY YOU CARRY IT! It feels like sometimes the load - the baggage will break me down, it is heavy, it is all consuming at times. I feel like the last few weeks have been a whirlwind of life taking me down. A heavy load, my emotional baggage suffocating at times. The weekend was filled with lots of fun and memory making but was crazy busy. Lately I haven't listened to my "nudge." My body was asking me to slow down and take it easy but I didn't listen and now am under the weather and feeling extra behind.
I have taken a bunch of time off teaching as I have been working on some special projects, needing to rest my hip and just haven't had the pep in my step to teach with a happy heart. (Hard to admit but the total honest truth.) My hip is finally on the mend but still have a long road to be fully recovered.
What I am realizing is that I am so busy running around filling my schedule I am maybe not dealing with my emotional baggage. Not carving out time to heal my heart and acknowledge the hurt. Just adding more and more bags to the pile. I am certainly trying but man is it hard. This week I am learning that I might need to change how I carry the load, to listen to the nudges. Knowing that I can lean into and onto others and continue to be open and honest with how I am really doing. I don't have to carry the load all myself. Allowing others to come along side and keep me upright for the days when I just can't carry it anymore. I am forever grateful for this community and the support I receive from my followers and friends through social media. I don't always know what I need but thankful to lean into you all. Focusing on a lighter load this week. 📷 @spruceandsparrow .
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#loveforlewiston #lewistonslegacy
#momlife #yycmoms #mamalife #yyc #yycblogger #yycbloggerbabes #mamagrief #inspo #quotes #reallife #thisisreallife #truth #baggage #sharingourstory #ourjourney #endsma #fightsma

DATE NIGHT // Hot Ronnie is looking hot - Nuff said......

LEWISTON CARDS // Last night in our grief support group for parents who have lost a child at ACH we talked about our support system. I don't think I did a great job of describing how incredible ours really is. (And for the record the grief group sucks and is wonderful all at the same time. It is a club I pray none of you will ever have to be a part of, but grateful to have others that get it. The loss of a child is to big to comprehend.) Anyway back to support systems....the list is long but I want to highlight one special lady today. Kayley has stood by me since before Lewiston got sick, she actually helped raise funds for the van for Ishan and his sister. It was so desperately needed and Kayley didn't hesitate for a second to step up. When we got our news this girl didn't shy away. She would text and ask what I needed "coffee, chocolate, wine"? Sure I would say, not really knowing what I needed besides a cure to save my son.....less than 20 minutes later all of the above was sitting on a shelf in our hospital room waiting for me. Not one but 2 hot coffees from a fancy coffee shop. What's even crazier is that after helping raise funds for a wheelchair accessible van she then made these Lewiston's card so that all proceeds would help our family out. It took a lot of stress off our family and was so cool to hear of purchases from around the globe. Once Lewiston passed I told Kayley we were good and thanked her. She grabbed me and said these cards were for you and your family the money is forever yours. As much as I would love to make this my shoe fund, it's just not right. Kayley and I have decided to use these funds to help others. The last check we gave to Ishans little sister for her school trip. The Lewiston cards took the weight off their family and ensures she gets to go. The money maybe used down the road for IVF or adoption or the Love for Lewiston Foundation - more details on that coming soon. If you have purchases a card -THANK YOU! K I don't have words to describe how incredible you have been. I am continually inspired by your warm and inviting smile, your generous heart, drive and determination and just general awesomeness. Thank you for your support.

BIRTHDAY GIRL // This girl turns 2 today! She is healthy, loud, brave, courageous, and always up for an adventure. Being outside is her favorite!!! She is a total daddy's girl and brings so much joy and life to anyone she is with. Proud to be her momma. Happy birthday sweet girl. Can't wait for another year of fun with you! .
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#momlife #yycblogger #birthdaygirl #birthday #mommalife #reallife #celebrate #family #love #swayziegrace #sheturned2 #party #growingup #sharingourstory

PLAYOFFS // There is nothing like watching playoff hockey especially in the Saddledome! I got to take Ishan to his first ever playoff hockey game! I am beyond THANKFUL for this team and their support. This organization is a class act. Thank you for going beyond time and time again - especially the behind the scenes support. And an even bigger shout out to the better halves @dianakobzanova for the tickets and @katiestajan for the jersey's. We are all smiles over here. Rocking our red, cheering loud and waiting for a win. GO FLAMES GO! .
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#cultivatewhatmatters #endsma #fightsma #sma #thisissma #familylove #fightthegoodfight #flames #calgaryflames #playoffs2017 #playoffhockey #nhl #nhlplayoffs #yyc #yycblogger #sports

HE IS RISEN // We celebrated the fun part of Easter - baskets to fill with chocolate eggs and yummy treats but more importantly that He is Risen. Easter is about grace and love. It is so simple, simple but yet so extravagant. Love and Grace - powerful words but even more when put into action. .
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#heisrisen #easter #cultivatewhatmatters #runtowardsyourroar #familylove #sharingourstory #eastercelebrations #stadfam #cousinlove #swayziegrace #powerfulwords #love #grace #wordstoliveby

IN IT TOGETHER // Its Easter weekend today....Good Friday isn't just a day off but the day Jesus hung on the cross for us. This is what Grace is all about - unmerited undeserving favor. Today was the first time I brought Ronnie to church 7 years ago. The start of our friendship....I can not imagine not asking him. My life although it not all rosy and perfect....have found the partner to do every mountain top and every deep dark valley with. Some days we want to quit or throw in the towel but then we use a little grace on each other and remember that we are in this together- bringing and raising up life together. Today I remember that Jesus is for us and not against us. He is in it with us. He is in my muck and mire. He is in every detail. I can stop asking "why" (that question might be the end of me) instead I will ask. "Now what?" "What are you doing to do?" Trusting that we are in this together waiting in anticipation for the good that will come. 📷 @spruceandsparrow .
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#lewistonslegacy #sharingourstory #familylove #runtowardsyourroar #cultivatewhatmatters #inthistogether #goodfriday #easter #family #stadfam #trust #faith #hotronnie

SAY WHAT // How we feel about this week! It's moving quick, Easter is around the corner and we are working hard on 2 special projects to honor our little guy, Lewiston. The emotions are real and raw. The struggle is sometimes so heavy but this project excites our family and we can't wait to give you more details. Stay tuned.....turning grief into purpose. .
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#fightsma #endsma #sma #cultivatewhatmatters #runtowardsyourroar #familylove #stadfam #loveforlewiston #makingitcount #nothingwasted #yyc #yycevents #yycblogger #bigthings #community #getinvolved #sharingourstory #griefjourney #lewistonslegacy

SIBLINGS // Thankful for these brothers of mine. Happy National Siblings day. Thanks for having my back and being so incredibly supportive. 📷 @betty_buhler .
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#cultivatewhatmatters #runtowardsyourroar #family #brothers #yyc #lotw #familylove #nationalsiblingsday #love

NO TRACTOR GRANDPA // Someone isn't totally sure about farm life. .
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#cultivatewhatmatters #farmlife #swayziegrace #motherhood #grandpajim #gator #johndeere #farming #raisingfarmkids

THE LEWISTON ULTRA // Check out my blog post on this wicked event that will honor Lewistons Legacy and raise some funds to continue research towards finding a cure. .
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#findacure #fightsma #endsma #yycblogger #blog #lululemon #nike #justdoit #thelewistonultra #movementmatters #runtowardsyourroar #momlife #swayziegrace #relayteam #cultivatewhatmatters #competitive #gonnabeathotronnie

LEWISTON'S LEGACY // I love how strangers become dear friends and then end up doing crazy awesome events to honor our son. Thankful beyond words @karaleiny this event makes my stomach swirl with excitement and drives me to wanna start pounding the pavement again - all pending this dang hip. To stay in the know - check out the post on my blog (link in the profile) follow @thelewistonultra and browse the website for all the info. And don't worry 50km through the mountains scares me too. There will be a relay category and I plan on entering a team and kicking Hot Ronnies butt. ( if your a fast runner, like really fast message me to be on my team). Can't wait for this run. .
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#sharingourstory #mamalife #momlife #cultivatewhatmatters #yyc #events #yvr #shuswap #shuswaps #run #runtowardsyourroar #trailevent #relay #teamjessica #lewistonslegacy #endsma #fightsma #sma #griefjourney #yycblogger #blog #lululemon #nike #justdoit #thelewistonultra #community

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