joyfaithlove joyfaithlove

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β €β €joyβ €πŸ°β €25β €πŸ°β €new zealand  β €β €I love Jesus, walls decked in fairylights, β €β €singing on roadtrips, drawing quirky pin β €β €up girls and typing paragraphs of loveπŸ“

Last night Mum gave me my Great Grandmothers ring and it fits me perfectly!! The stone is Garnet which is also my birthstone and the band is gold and I love my gold jewellery!! πŸ“

Sometimes life takes you to the places you daydream about and the moment is magical!! πŸ“

I feel happy in the direction my life is currently going. It may seem a little odd timing to say such a thing because not a whole lot is happening right now but sometimes I just know when God is about to do something new. I feel change in the atmosphere and I love this feeling. This year I have made some beautiful new friendships and I appreciate this so much because it has felt like years since I last felt close to people. I have been brave enough this year to face many of my biggest fears and kick fears butt. I am so proud of me for that. I think this feeling of change in the air, is my reward for pushing out fear and hugging into my faith this year. God knows my hearts cry and the desires I pray for each night and although I may not have them in my hands grasp right now, I trust that God has the right places and people on their way to me. I'm excited for the adventures God takes me on next. Life truly is about the journey and sometimes along the way we have to ask ourselves if we are using the waiting seasons to develop our character into better versions of ourselves. Although some days I may feel stuck, lonely and defeated, I know that I am a much stronger and capable person than I was this time last year and that's called reaching my potential. It feels good to embrace who I am, work on my mental health and see the progress I am making along the way. One day soon I will wake up in the city that I love, with a church to call home, friends to call family and a guy to hug at night. I never thought at 25 my life dreams would be the basics of life but sometimes when you never have it, they become your hearts deepest desires. God hears my prayer and I just have to make the most of embracing who I am while I am waiting on his answer. Insecurity and self doubt only happens when we don't truly believe we are good enough to have Gods best, don't be that person. Know your worth, know who you are in God and have faith in the seemingly impossible. God is about to do a new thing and I want to be part of it πŸ“

I love my mumma bear πŸ’œ

πŸ“

That time three weeks ago when I went to see the Opera house with my friends!! I still can't believe I got on two plane trips all by myself and didn't have a panic attack or a meltdown at the airport! It's a very rare occassion that people tell me they are proud of me but this was one of those achievements!! It's a nice feeling overcoming your fears and arriving on the otherside of that fear!! That plane trip landing into Sydney was one of the best feelings of my life and the highlight of my year so far!! I may have felt anxious the whole time but I proved to myself I was capable!! 😍 #proudmoments #selfappreciation

Having hope has been the very thing that has got me through some of the toughest seasons in my life. Being a dreamer is often seen as a bad quality to have but my colourful imagination has been the thing that has brought me great comfort and strength during my grey cloudy reality. Someone in church once told me as a kid to never lose my childlike faith and I'm glad I never did. With so much sadness and depression going on in the world, we should embrace big imaginations and Moses parting the sea kinda faith! God did not create me to supress my creativity and ideas, to please a society that bows to low life expectations. I am a dreamer and I have learned to embrace this wonderful characterisic about me, because God put it there for a reason and my life will be an adventurous mission exploring the depths of it. I am thankful for my deep thoughts and stories and the inner world inside my head, it has filled some of my darkest moments with so much colour and wonder and joy. I have learned the art of balance and when to keep it real but sometimes it's a little bit nice to have my head in the clouds and float away off to lala land; sometimes it is in those daydreams that God speaks to me in the most vivid way and I love that about our relationship!! 😍

It was kinda different going to Hillsong conference as a twenty five year old. The last conference I went to was getsmart conference when I was in my teens and boy have I grown so much since then. I used to go to conferences and spend the whole of worship crying about a boy (not that there is anything wrong with crying in the presence of Jesus) but I felt like I was just so miserable inside. I look back and think of all the sermons I could have got so much more out of, had I not been distracted by the Joel Houstons in the room or the immature boys in my youth group who didn't want to kiss me. It could be a combination of the anxiety medication I now take or the age I am at but I noticed I never cried at all during conference last week. Maybe I've just become immune to heartbreak or maybe I really have stopped letting petty things steal my joy and consume my every thought. There is a time and season for sadness but I think it is so important to put those things aside every once in a while and let yourself hear from God with a clear head and an open heart. It can be so easy to get caught up in our emotions but God is so much more than how we feel at present time. The excitement in his heart for us never wavers. You don't need to be in love in order to enjoy a conference or a sermon. I think I have proved that you can feel like an empty mess of disappointment and still have the courage and strength to concur fears, get on planes, eat meals with people, socialize and make the most of a conference. I feel proud and amazed at how far I have come this year. I may not have the desires of my heart right now but God knows my heart and I believe in choosing to make the most of my right now, God will make a way for my tomorrow. I don't always feel put together but I am thankful I am not still that crying teenager who thinks she's not good enough. I was at a conference in the same room as some of my biggest influences as a teen and I can honestly say I felt every bit as important, called and special as the Joel Houstons, Taya Smiths and Carl Lentz's in the room. The realisation of this spoke volumes to me. Character development makes me happy. πŸ“

Looking forward to the future!! Feeling creative!! Feeling artistic!! Feeling capable!! Lets do this!! πŸ˜πŸ“

I still can't believe I went to hillsong conference last week!! 😍

Missing @hillsongconf so much!! What an adventure the past ten days were for me!! People keep asking how conference was and what I got out of my time there but to be honest getting on those planes alone and making my way through the airports was the biggest breakthrough of the whole trip!! I actually can't believe I did it, I overcome my biggest fear all by myself and didn't have a panic attack or burst into tears once!! It really has shown me I am much stronger and capable of facing my fears, than I give myself credit for!! Flying may not be enjoyable but it is endurable and I kept telling myself that!! My flight home was much smoother than my trip there until we descended into Auckland and flew right through a thunder cloud, I thought I was going to die for ten minutes but I did my deep breathing and survived through the panic!! It was so lovely to spend time with my childhood best friend and meet her brother and his friend who flew over from Scotland!! I loved meeting all of her friends at hillsong church on sunday too, everyone was honestly so lovely and friendly!! At conference I loved watching @tayasmith lead worship and dance around the stage like crazy, it reminded me of what I was like when I used to lead worship!! Sometimes just being in that environment and atmosphere, is all you need to remind yourself of who you are spiritually!! I appreciate the inspiration, the encouragement and the fire Hillsong conference has ignited within my spirit!! Also 'Not Today' was my favourite song at conference because the chorus line is 'Let the devil know not today' and if there was ever a statement to live by, that would be mine!! Feeling proud of myself for overcoming fears and hopeful for the places and people God will draw me to next!! πŸ˜πŸ‘Š

Hillsong conference vibes!! 😍

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