Hello! My name is Joshua Bade and I am not a man. Nor am I a woman. I have never fully identified as either but if anything I’ve always felt more feminine. My femininity is 100% the reason I found so much strength at such a young age. I felt like it put me ahead of myself and those around me. Women have always have been the core foundation of how I found respect in myself and others. I was able to gauge parts of myself that gave me an unbelievable amount of delusional confidence in my early years. As I get older, I find myself clinging to the past more and more and sometimes the more I search, the more I find myself getting more confused and lost. Drag, Art, and Music have been my beginning, my present, and my future and it is how I choose to identify. I have lost my presence within the past year. I have grown immensely in a lot of different aspects, but I am not okay. But that doesn’t mean I am not changing for the better. Everything I’m going through is here to reassure me of what truly matters. Stripping away the bullshit to let your inner light be the only thing that shines. I’m trying to not be so afraid of my light, but I’m terrified. Please be patient with me when I’m feeling slow, but don’t be afraid to let me know that I can work harder. I love you all very much. No matter what you are to me now every single one of you matter to me. Please do not forget that, even in my confusion. I don’t know what’s next, but I’m not supposed to. .