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Holly Brannigan  Making babies, pots and community, with my bestest friend.

A last minute snap of this sort-of yarn shrine for you Mimi. I love this little cup lovingly made by a cherished friend but dropped as soon as I’d got home. Filled with those pretty ends of wool that couldn’t make anything but one day something will give them the opportunity to ✨shine✨! #yarnshrinegiveaway #yarnshrine

As we talked about hibernation and what winter looked like for these spiky critters forming between our fingers, I felt a pang of envy.
Today I feel a bit spiky too! This sleep dep getting to me y'all.

Means @stonesbakeryfalmouth sour cherry, fennel seed and hazelnut sourdough. This bread with a coat of goats butter is such a great thing to have for the second breakfast once we get back from school and the bakery. And elevenses. And lunch. And afternoon tea, post school snack, scoffed between teeth clean and stories while they slowly walk the stairs (shameful I know).. once the kids are finally asleep. Seriously it's addictive stuff.

Always porridge.
Today with almond milk, honey, figs and sunshine through the window.

Thanks for all the love and advice after my last dramatic mama out pouring. Just when it all felt a bit much queenie came home that afternoon from school wailing. Having launched herself off the climbing frame at school she'd fractured her arm! We've been in hibernation the past three days and it's been glorious and funnily enough, was actually just what we needed!

Two sunflowers 🌞 .
In other news This cold is definitely a chest infection so I'm feeling worse and worse. Spent the morning in bed before Liam heads out to work a late shift.... which means attempting the witching hours alone. 😳💀School run, snacks, pre dinner hunger and school exhaustion rages, dinnertime and -gulp- bath and bed. These are the times I need God most. When we finally fall in from school I can feel the shudders of tiredness and anxiety, I'm desperate to crash and let them sort themselves but these moments in children's life are some of the most important and where we can get in great times of discipleship.
Here are a few things I've found help me out.
Sleep! Sleep deprivation is such a huge one. I gotta have early nights and sleep when they sleep. Before and after the school run I take a huuuuuge drink of water, I find this gives me a flush of energy and a cube of dark chocolate because "well done, you've done half the day mama!"
I check what I'm doing for dinner and see timings. Sometimes I give my self a huge hug because I cooked dinner this morning(sometimes!). I fight the cranky mum inside wanting to get nagging at queenie to change out of her uniform, and let her do what she needs to. It's difficult to remember they're tired and need extra care at this time when I'm feeling so tired. We have a snack at the table with tea and talk about our days. I try and look at them and be present in that moment, counting my gratitudes and noticing their beautiful quirks.
Being organised and efficient is such a struggle for me. When I'm feeling most vulnerable and low I panic that this makes me incapable for motherhood. Unable to ever get this right and my head falls into circles of doubting. I'm very blessed to have Liam, my parents and the church around to help lift my head and see the accomplishments I've made and the incredible children we've patented. I'd love to know ways you fight the attacks of negativity as a mother. What helps to get you through the darker days?
Wow, I didn't expect all of that to come out! A waffley honest post for you all (that I'll definitely regret this later) x it's tough mums, let's be open about it and share ideas.

Buttons and tiny teapots for friends.

I'm utterly besotted. 🌞🌚✨
The past week has been tough, I had /have a chest infection and my chest has also ached as my big girl so happily ran from my side to be back among the throng of children at the school playground. Needed a lot of sleep and rest but the babe was unwell too so lack of sleep has dragged the illness out a little longer. My to do list is bigger than my arm and not reducing much but at least I've stolen plenty of time flicking through a heartbreaking but wonderful new fiction book. And that has been very very good.

Hey man. I'm desperate to make you some play mates, but it's all a bit crazy over here, so 'fraid you'll be hanging out with yourself a bit longer.

Love this magical photo of my two from @thomasbeaumont

Baern's first swim in the river.

And the wind blew and the clouds came over. A chill crept in through the windows and the rain knocked petals from the last flowers of summer. A shiny apple on the table and blackberries paint fingers and the kiss of her lips.
A subtle shift, nostalgia, sorrow, joy, and a little excitement. 🍂

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