365 days later, and I still have no words to describe it. there are some days where i truly don't think i'll get through the grief. whether it be a song ryan liked or just a motorcycle passing me, the constant reminder that ryan is no longer here consumes my mind. i expected him to burst through the door screaming and hugging everyone during the holidays or when i came home. the absence of ryan sucks. during this past year i learned that it's okay to not be okay. it's okay to grieve. God ultimately has a plan, and i have to give this to Him. ryan, i absolutely miss the heck out of you. i wish you were still here to teach me how to live freely + adventurously and to make fun of me when i do silly things. i love you so much. missing you always, ry.