heyannahambly heyannahambly

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anna hambly  it’s good but it’s hard but i’m learning enneagram 4 rva all day @heyolliebizzle

happy valentines bbs.
if he ain’t lookin at me like my pup, i ain’t want it ✌🏼♥️
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also i think it’s 100% okay to choose yourself over the wrong person and still be really sad about it.
one day at a time bbs 🌱

happy place ✨
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(swipe to see my assistant hard at work) 🐾
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the real story is that i’m sick and i broke up with my boyfriend this morning and i’m not sure what i want or need so posting a staged, pretty pic of my bed and this lovely painting feels good. isn’t life weird?
(not pictured: wine i spilled on the other side of my comforter, a billion tissues under said comforter, 6 jars/glasses/mugs, and lots of dog hair. and a heavy heart. and a sick head).
🤷🏻‍♀️just keepin it real.
one day at a time, bbs.

i promised myself years ago that i’d never buy myself flowers when i was sad. (what if they didn’t fix it? i’d hate to resent a group of flowers. that’s a lot of pressure to put on those poor bbs. can you imagine?!) so with last year being what it was, i didn’t really find myself buying any. i knew i had to crawl out of that pit before i could celebrate with any sweet flower friends.
then this past weekend i knew it was time. i was shopping for food to cook which, if you know me,
has been THE hardest part of healing. the motivation hasn’t been there for a very long time. so i found the only bundle of white tulips. i had to dig for them and i wasn’t sure there’d be any white ones (which are my favorite..#neutralsforever) so i scooped these babies up and breathed a small sigh of “yes. flowers, again” satisfaction. ...then this morning i felt the dread creeping back in.
and for a minute i felt the weight of that. everyone close to me seems to be struggling with heavy things. i feel disconnected from it all. from myself. even from my puppy who’s decided he doesn’t want to sleep in my bed with me anymore 💔
and then i remembered this interview with elizabeth gilbert (shared in my stories today) where she references a similar feeling she had. a friend said to her, have you ever felt like there was a benevolent force guiding you? something holding you? that you were being protected? and she said yes and her friend said everyone else has the same. thing.
and it’s not called liz.
and i started to feel better. i felt the freedom to ground back into myself. i’m late for work and my friends and family and coworkers and the strangers around me are struggling but it’s not up to me to fix it all and, idk, that helps the dread lift.
and i look at these flowers and remember that that i too was struggling and i’ve come a long way.
one day at a time, friends. tend to yourself. ♥️

i think one of the things i’ve most grown to appreciate about the post-holiday winter months are the silence and solitude they offer.
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i’m not sure about the rest of you, but the world has felt so loud to me lately..the air filled with hustle and bustle and “buy this” and “go there” and even “think about _____”.
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i feel tired. i’ve felt tired, to be fair. this year has been ugly and it’s been beautiful and it’s been ugly beautiful. healing is not linear and i’m learning that, if we’re lucky, we keep healing and growing and learning right up until the end.
i hope you feel some freedom to stop and still if you need to.
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as for me, i’m taking the month of january to myself. no plans, no commitments, no living out of a major energy deficit..and i refuse to think it selfish.
i need quiet, i need still, i need soft.
i so want to be softer. gentler. with me, with others. i’ll say more about my january hibernation as it comes but for now, i leave these thoughts here.
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please take a deep breath and give yourself a squeeze. you’re so worth caring for ✨

today looked a whole lot like despair and defeat until some of my people pulled me out of my funk (literally just by being with me. no advice, no venting, just hangin). i finally got out of bed at 1 and, you know, i actually didn’t feel guilty for taking that long to get moving today.
winter is rough. the holidays are rough. we’re all feeling it in our own ways. i think that, as someone who grew up as a total people-pleaser, i’m finally learning that taking care of myself is a *good* thing..even if it means i skip my work christmas party, turn off my phone, and watch a movie with my roomie instead. even if it means that i don’t spend money i genuinely don’t have on things my people don’t reaaally need. even if it means that i say no to plans because i need to recharge.
it’s so easy to get caught up in shame over the shoulds and the obligations and, honestly, all the things i project others to expect from me..but the real beauty comes when i show up as myself. and i can’t show up as myself unless i’ve taken time to be with myself. for so many years i’ve scheduled things and made plans in advance and operated on a deficit of social energy and projected expectations and i’m really finally seeing that for what it is.
and i guess i’m just sharing this in case any of that resonates with you too. (is anyone else learning this? i’d genuinely love to hear your hearts on this stuff.)
it’s okay to be exactly where you are, even if it doesn’t feel okay. hug yourself tight and be gentle with you, okay?
and go get you a @bearceramics mug tomorrow at union market because it’s her last show of the year and she’s really just the best ♥️

i closed out my favorite month with one of my very favorite humans ♥️
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the past couple of years i haven’t felt ready to celebrate the holiday/christmas season. it’s interesting to look at this time through the lens of depression and the apathy it brings. this year i’ll be in a much, much better place than last but even so, it feels off. you know what it’s like when you put your head under water and suddenly everything sounds different? that’s sort of what the usual holiday excitement is for me now. i’m not sure why that feels important to tell you..but i can’t be the only one.
last year the apathy made me feel guilty. i couldn’t believe that i wasn’t joyful, or expectant, or dazzled by it all. i sat in church and wished i could go home. i’d hoped jesus would understand.
i guess what i want to say is that if you’re not feeling holly jolly either, please don’t feel guilty. keep taking it one day at a time and reach out to someone you trust. i think that when i have the energy, i’ll look for the quieter things in this season to enjoy..like the smell of the pine, the warmth of hot cider, the holiday baking shows...and finding a stocking for ollie ☺️
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one day at a time. i love you and you’re so important ✨

#optoutside
feat. the boiz of fall 🍂👉🏼
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@nataliewsizemore + @jennwarrenhome i love you ♥️
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also it’s still november and i’m still soaking it in deeply. so moody, so cold...so good for this girl 🌾

let’s see if i can accurately put feelings into words:
i think i’m in love with you.
yes, you.
you reading this right now.
you’ve got a heart that beats to its own unique rhythm, a heart that lifts and falls and keeps your body moving and your emotions honest...you’ve got dreams, you have rituals, you have a playlist that fits that one specific mood *just right*, you see the beauty in a dried flower like nobody else..
maybe i’m just drunk on november warmth inside, but i think that people are so uniquely beautiful and i’m feeling immensely grateful for it today.
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what’s something that you love about yourself or someone else? tell me + let’s spread some warmth ☺️🍂
edit: this was not supposed to be about me—tell me something about YOU! ♥️

stop.
stand here.
and breathe in,
all that makes you grateful for this life.
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a good laugh.
a good cry.
when both are fused together,
at the same time.
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soul connections.
choosing someone with your whole heart.
the ease exhaled after the release.
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tuck these close,
into the corners of your pockets.
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the deep crevices of your spine.
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so you may always,
stand tall in the belief,
that no matter what you are given,
magic is always present within you,
in what’s here,
and what’s right now.
@danielledoby ♥️

slow down,
take a deep breath,
get outside,
and give your soul some rest.
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the cold, quiet mountain air set me straight this weekend and for it i’m deeply thankful 🍂

november is my absolute favorite month of the year. after the bright, busy excitement (or the struggle for the summer lovers) of october, november comes in to offer some stillness. it offers a sleepy pause between halloween and the holiday season. it brings cool, crisp air that reminds our lungs we’re alive. it sends us in to cozy up. the bright leaves have been falling and the evergreens stand tall and proud; they’ve waited all year for their turn. thanksgiving comes and reminds us to be grateful, to hug the ones we have around us..to come together over a meal. november is moody and deep-feeling and cozy and chilly and it looks like my soul and it feels like home and i’m just really thankful it’s here 🌲🍂

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