hexsteph hexsteph

3,842 posts   61,903 followers   402 followings

Stephanie Bendixsen  Australian TV presenter: National Geographic. Formerly screenPLAY & Good Game. Author. Games๐ŸŽฎ FurBabies๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿบ Travel๐ŸŒ Rep: IMG Talent

Okay this is the LAST photo I will share of Singapore city I swear... It's just so breathtaking. ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฌ

Home with my sweet children. ๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿ’œ

I stayed up too late last night but it was worth it. I've been missing out on these much-loved Sea of Thieves sessions because I'm travelling so much. You all know I'm a @lenovolegion ambassador - but this is my first gaming laptop and believe me when I say this has changed so much for me. Being able to have this time with my friends online amidst the chaos is so awesome. AND I AM PLAYING FROM MY HOTEL BED! โ˜บ๏ธ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿผ
.
.
@lenovoanz #lenovo #technology #laptop #gaming #gamer #videogame #videogames #gamestrong #gaminglaptop #legion #LenovoLegion #seaofthieves #raregames

Aparrently today is world mental health day - so I just thought I'd share this photo of me when I was 49 kilos.
I think a severe sense of self-loathing for my body has taken up a major part of my headspace since I turned 15. It was at 15 that I first started to gain weight (in all the natural places a girl does at 15). I remember freaking out about the changes my body was going through and embarking on my first diet. I lost weight quickly and easily and got a thrill out of the sense of control it gave me. Of course - as my body fought back against sudden deprivation, I gained it back just as quickly. What I didn't know was that I had set in motion a devastating cycle of extremes that would follow me well into my 30s.
"Just eat a balanced diet and exercise regularly" I hear you saying. Sure. But you underestimate the power of low self-esteem and its ability to drive you to extreme measures.
In this picture I was in my late 20s, exercising every day and eating around 1000 calories. I counted everything I ate and refused to go to a restaurant unless they had their menu online so that I could decide what I would allow myself to eat before hand. People just thought I was an enthusiastic 'foodie'. It was crazy.
And yet... I'd be lying if I looked at this picture and told you I didn't want to look like that. Part of me still does. As horribly unrealistic my lifestyle was. And even though my head looks a bit too big for my body in this picture?
Anyway. Body-acceptance is a journey and I'm trying REALLY hard every day to find equilibrium. I'm so exhausted. Maybe one day I'll get there. I've found a lot of great books along the way that have been a huge help and I have lots of support.
If you're going through something similar and need support yourself - consider seeing an eating disorder professional. I can also thoroughly recommend 'Brain over Binge' by Kathryn Hansen, and her follow-up recovery guide. Thanks for reading! It's okay not to be OK.
PS. Was Peter 12 when we started dating? Lol according to this picture, aparrently yes!?

๐Ÿฅ‚๐Ÿพ๐Ÿ˜

I went to the top of the Marina Bay Sands for the best view in Singapore. Did not disappoint! ๐ŸŒƒ

I've spent the last few days here in Singapore watching the PVP Esports Championship - there are a few tournaments running but Dota 2 is definitely where the action (and the crowds!) are at. The commentary and pre and post game discussion has been so informative, awesome breakdowns of strategy. I feel like I'm learning so much.
Today is the FINAL DAY! Tonight we'll see one team walk away with the trophy ๐Ÿ† (and the prize pool) and I can't wait to see it all unfold!
So impressed with @optus for supporting events like this and helping to provide Australians with a platform to compete on a world stage. ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿผ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡บ You can watch the championship online at twitch.tv/pvpesports ๐Ÿ†
.
.
#games #gaming #esports #pvpesports #pvpesportschapionship #singapore #twitch #gamer #dota2 #competitivegaming #professionalgamer #pcgaming

Most Popular Instagram Hashtags