This is Harold. Harold is a drawing I birthed over 7 years ago now. I made him the day after a failed suicide attempt. It wasn’t the first nor was it the last (I will not go into detail of how). He is my little guardian though. He was the point where I realised that even in all that shit, all that darkness there was still something there in me. I was too young and depressed to really get the importance of it all. Now I do and I treasure it. He was kind of the start of a turning point, even though it got a lot lot worse before it got better. Looking at him now makes me realise all I need, all that I want and crave I can find inside myself, and you are never truly alone and love is all around even when it’s hard to see and feel. When I started selling my artwork he was the first thing I started selling. Him in print form. (I don’t sell prints anymore). He is the point where all of this truly started, even if I didn’t know it then.
If you are reading this and struggling let it be your sign. Healing takes time. YEARS! It isn’t easy at all and it comes in waves and very rarely all at once. Realise and remember you really are loved even if you are convincing yourself otherwise. Get help. Reach out to your friends and family, go see someone, doesn’t always have to be a traditional doctor. Go online and use an online resource if you don’t have it in you to talk to someone directly right now. But just start. Start your own healing. It will be hard. A lot harder than being depressed. And it will get good and then bad again and then good, because that’s life. But trust me when I say this it is fucking worth it and you a definitely needed here. I can’t help you personally because I am still healing myself but reach out to the ones you love. They will help you more than you know now. Don’t be ashamed it’s ok to be a mess. Love you 💜💜💜