(Repost)- After not seeing the sunshine for the past few days here in Austin, the dreary weather began to take a toll on my mental wellness. Old patterns of not wanting to get out of bed, being inactive & eating unhealthy, & finding very little reason to do much of anything were resurfacing. The sun came out a few days ago & this blah mood started to fade, but only before going bed did I shed light on to some very dark matter.
In the past, these patterns of depression ran hardcore in my veins from 14 years old til about two years ago... more than HALF of my physical existence on this planet. Life never felt worth living, I often “fantasized” on ways to end it all, & honestly never saw myself living to see my 30th birthday. The world we were born into never felt like the one I’ve always held in my heart, so why keep on existing in such a painful place? Happy things surely happened in my life, but my insides always stayed melancholy. It became a cyclical dependence of intoxicating sorrow, because life felt more “real” when I focused on the underlying sadness of even the most beautiful of things.
But things changed in 2015 when I hit rock bottom & was yearning for passion. Two @activateaustin practitioners of the Modern Mystery School offered the Life Activation session and “Empower Thyself” class that set my soul on fire! 🔥 All my unanswered questions now feel like they have infinite possibilities ever unfolding! Parts of me are shining through that I thought had been dead over two decades ago! My true purpose in life is being uncovered and I’m expressing my heart in radical ways! And there is a witnessing of much deeper meaning to this sacred time here on Earth in this Divine body!
When the dark well of depression shows up now, I catch myself and work through the core issues of what’s really going on instead of wallowing in more suffering. Best yet, when it starts turning cloudy & grey, there is this bright ray of hope & unwavering piece of faith that I’ve never before attained... that the Sun is always shining above & within me! ☀️ If you’re in need of more sunshine in YOUR life, ask me about Life Activation & how to begin your own path to self-healing!