discovering_sarah discovering_sarah

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Sarah  Sarah's journey to happiness 🌻 Body Positive πŸ’ž ED survivor πŸ’ͺ

Why do memes like this even exist? Other than to reinforce sexism and further engrain the idea that as a woman all you should care about is what men like about your body.
I like my boobs, bum, eyes and smile and that's all that matters not whether or not a man likes them. None of my body parts are better than the others, they are all apart of me. They all play a role in my ability to experience the world and I love them for that, not for whether they're what men are looking for in a woman.
Why is it that people continue to insist that women are only here for the pleasure of men? We are so much more than that! You break us down into body parts like the rest of us doesn't matter. Our brains, our hearts, our passions, our talents. Women have so much to offer the world, which includes men, other than just our body parts. So why minimise our existence to which body part men like more?
Why continue perpetuating the idea that it's ok to simplify a woman's existence into which body part men look for? 🚫
Your body is here for you, not men's enjoyment so who cares what they think? And if someone is only interested in you because of one part of your body they are not treating you with the respect you deserve and aren't worth your time of day.
Sadly, however, in this misogynistic society that we live in, women are still taught that we are nothing more than a collection of body parts here for the male gaze. 🚫
But FUCK THAT! You are so much more than your body and you deserve to be treated accordingly. It doesn't matter which body part men look for. You don't need a man's approval to love yourself or your body. It has nothing to do with them! So celebrate every part of you and don't give a flying fuck about whether or not it's what men are looking for. 🚫
Image reposted from @everybodydeserveslove_ .Why on earth a page that is supposed to encourage self love and body positivity is reinforcing such a backwards concept, I have no idea. But I hope they are aware that it isn't just a funny meme but rather reinforcing sexism and minimising women, once again, down to their appearance.

I wish I could go back in time,
and tell my younger self all the things I know now.
I'd tell her to vow,
That she will be kind to herself regardless of the lies her disorder yells inside.
I'd tell her I know how much she's struggling,
With all the pain she locked inside.
I'd tell her it's okay that she doesn't know who she is,
That will come with time. πŸŒ€
I'd tell her that she's good enough,
Exactly how she is, it's not something she needs to find.
I'd tell her that she does not need to starve and hurt herself,
That will only ever bring more pain.
I'd tell her how much good there is inside of her,
That she's masked behind all that pain. πŸŒ€
I'd tell her how beautiful she is,
That she does not need to change a thing.
I'd tell her not to hide her smile,
That it will only be taken from her for a while. πŸŒ€
I'd tell her it's okay to feel this way,
That she isn't going crazy she's just looking for self-love.
I'd tell her things get better,
That she no longer cries alone at night. πŸŒ€
I'd tell her she can win this fight,
That food and weight are no longer all that's in her sight.
I'd tell her she can ask for help,
That she doesn't have to go through this alone. πŸŒ€
I'd tell her she deserves help too,
That no one should go through this alone.
I'd tell her not to be afraid,
That life is just one big ride. πŸŒ€
I'd tell her how sorry I am,
That I fed her so many lies. πŸŒ€
I'd tell her she could not know,
But it's something she will find with time.
I wish I could go back in time,
and tell my younger self all the things I know now.
I think it would of changed things,
But now we'll never know. πŸŒ€
So read my words as warning,
To stop this dangerous path.
Life is worth so much more,
Than what that path tells you life is for.

#Repost @yourstruelymelly has summed this up beautifully. Helping us learn and grow as always. Thank you πŸ’ž "Can we please stop only celebrating healthy fat bodies. ❀️ Can we please stop only celebrating fat bodies that we find attractive. ❀️ Can we please stop only celebrating fat bodies that are feminine. ❀️ Can we please stop only celebrating fat bodies that are white. ❀️ Can we please stop only celebrating fat bodies that make us comfortable. ❀️ ❀️❀️ Body Positivity should make us uncomfortable, it's should make us question what we've been taught to believe, it shouldn't be palatable or something that makes us only feel good. It should challenge us. Body Positivity is not something that we adapt to our liking. It is defined, it has a purpose, it is political. Body Positivity is about recognizing how our bodies affect our experience in this world and it's about breaking down those systems of oppression. Body Positivity is not interchangeable for self love, if that's all it is to you, you are co-opting a movement and watering it down, contributing to its de-radicalization. Self-love, while not inherently bad, will not change the ways in which people with fat bodies are discriminated against, or the ways in which trans folks, black folks, folks with disabilities are treated and devalued in this world. This is a movement for marginalized bodies. I'm not afraid to say that. I celebrate self-love because I know it's power, I celebrate body neutrality because I believe we are so much more than our bodies. I celebrate recovery from a life where so many of us have felt trapped in our bodies we were taught are not good enough. But Body Positivity at its core questions the hierarchy of bodies and it doesn't buy into the lies. Self love cannot overcome all, if it does for you, that's where you find your privilege. BODY POSITIVITY IS FOR FAT BODIES, BLACK BODIES, DISABLED BODIES. ITS FOR TRANS FOLKS AND ALL PEOPLE OF COLOR. BODY POSITIVITY IS FOR THe HEALTHY AND UNHEALTHY. FOR THOSE WHO ARE MASCULINE AND FEMININE. AND FOR EVERY SHAPE OF BODY NO MATTER HOW YOUR FAT IS PLACED. Body Positivity is powerful, don't take away it's power by simply redefining it as self love."

I'm a pretty average person.
I'm in the majority. ✨I'm white ✨I'm cisgendered ✨I'm able bodied ✨I'm an average height ✨I'm an average weight ✨I'm smart but not a genius ✨I'm good at many things but not the best in the field at any.
Average was never enough for me though. I wanted to be the best, the most extreme, the top of the top.
✨I wanted to be perfect.
I believed that if I wasn't the best then it meant I was a failure. I expected myself to be perfect in every way. Perfect grades, perfect looks, perfect hobbies. If I was going to do something I had to be the best at it. I couldn't just be thin I had to be the thinnest. I couldn't be the best version of myself for myself, I had to be the perfect girlfriend, the perfect friend, the perfect student, the perfect employee, the perfect child.. but, of course, I never was.
No matter how hard I tried, how much I pushed myself I was never perfect and every time I failed to reach that impossible target my self-esteem plummeted.
I couldn't understand why when I put everything I humanly could into it I still fell short of perfect but of course I never would be able to reach perfection because ... THERE πŸ‘ IS πŸ‘ NO πŸ‘ SUCH πŸ‘ THING πŸ‘ AS πŸ‘ PERFECT!
Even if I got perfect grades and was the best in every field, I still wouldn't be perfect. Even if I destroyed every blemish on me, I still wouldn't be perfect. Even if I did everything anyone ever wanted of me, I still wouldn't be perfect.
Perfect means different things to different people and I was never going to be able to please all of them. Even if by some fluke I did, I still wouldn't of been perfect in my own eyes so nothing would change. I'd still see myself as a failure. The only thing that can change that is letting go of the impossible standards I was trying to live up to and embracing myself for all that I am and all that I can do.
But being average isn't a bad thing. It doesn't mean that you're not good enough. It doesn't make you any less than someone else. We're all humans trying to find our way through this crazy life and a huge part of that is learning. Continued in comments ⬇️⬇️⬇️

I'm a skin picker. This is what my fingers look like at the moment. They've been worse and they've been better. I'm not showing you this for attention or sympathy. I'm purely showing you the reality of the situation. πŸ’…
Skin picking is probably the most self-destructive behaviour that I still engage in. I don't remember when I started, it's just something I've always done but I know it must of started when I was a child. πŸ’…
I do it constantly: when I'm bored, embarrassed, sad, angry, fed up, in pain, anything. However I believe it's largely an anxiety response. One that's become an obsession. Whenever I see or feel uneven skin on my fingers I feel this compulsion to remove it. I keep thinking about it and picking at it until it's eventually gone. Of course picking at your skin only makes it worse. It gets rid of one bit and makes the rest more uneven which in turn causes me to pick at it more. The cycle goes on and on, never stopping. πŸ’…
Sometimes I find my self doing it without even realising, other times I know exactly what I'm doing and can't stop. I no that it's not a good habit, it hurts a lot, my fingers bleed all the time, my boyfriend hates it, I worry about what people think about it all the time and my hands look like this yet I continue. πŸ’…
It's not something I want to do but it's also not something I don't want to do. I've conquered so many self-destructive behaviours, except this one. It's the least destructive of all of them and in some way it's easier just to continue than to add another behaviour to fight. πŸ’…
I don't really talk about it because I honestly don't know how to talk about it. How do you explain why you feel the need to compulsively pick the skin off your fingers when you don't even know yourself?
How do you stop picking your fingers when you don't know how? Often I'm told "just don't do it" and to an extent their right, that would solve it. But just as saying "just eat" to someone with an eating disorder or "just don't worry" to someone with anxiety it doesn't solve anything.

The incredible @carlasaltillustration drew me. How awesome is this! I love it!
Check out her page to see more amazing body positive illustrations.

Is anyone else fed up of squeezing into tight jeans all the time? Giving up comfort for style? I know I am and I love skinny jeans. 🍍
@pineyandco are an amazing body positive brand that is reinventing elephant pants. Their pants stretch and transform as your body does because let's face it our bodies aren't just one size fits all. They change depending on what time of the month it is, how big of a lunch you've had and sometimes for no reason at all. So it's about time we had some pants that can too!
I love piney&co pants and can't wait until I get my hands on some of my own. I had the honour of being featured on their #lovewhatyougotblog and you can to! Head to their website to nominate someone. 🍍
Piney&co are committed to making women look and feel good. Their pants are both fashionable and comfortable all while maintaining a body positive ethos! So check them out on: 🍍
Be sure to click on the link above before you buy anything! 🍍
Order now and get free delivery anywhere in the continental U.S. Plus if you sign up to their newsletter you get 10% off. 🍍
So use the link above (and in my bio) and get ordering now. #pineyandco

Repost @sonnyturner___ I love this caption so much! Preach it girl πŸ™Œ "Today I was basically told ''SHE NEEDS TO LOSE SOME WEIGHT OR SHES NEVER GONNA GET A BOYFRIEND''. For men or women who actually have this mindset I have a few pointers for you
1. women (like me) do not lose weight or doll themselves up in order to FIND A MAN or for male approval or acceptance. Both fat shaming and skinny shaming is NOT OK. We do these things because it makes US feel better in ourselves
2. while that's great, there are women out there who are learning to except themselves without losing weight and without layers of makeup or filters
3. this does not mean we do not care about ourselves or our hygiene. It actually means we are 'brave' because we dare to go against societies expectations of us
4. If you can't fathom the idea of a woman being overweight, or hairy, or ugly (IN YOUR EYES) being happy, then welcome to the 21st century honey
5. Women are no longer allowing their worth to be determined by SOCIETY, THE MEDIA, MALES, THEIR PEERS OR SOCIAL 'NORMS'
6. I am no longer allowing people to dictate to me wether I am beautiful or not. I am DEFINITELY not allowing people to dictate my happiness. Being comfortable in my skin is what I aim to be and if I inspire people on the way then that's great - no trolls are ever going tell me I'm not worthy. There are 10000 other qualities in the world to be admired for than ur physical appearance and I wish young girls were taught that from a young age. So here's me feeling sexy and beautiful REMINDING MYSELF THAT I AM A KWEEEEEEEEEN regardless of some people's fat phobic, sexist and just generally ugly ideals. "
#beautybeyondsize πŸ’‹ β„’@sonnyturner___

Let's talk hair. As you can see I've had MANY different hairstyles over the years. If I could change it, I would hoping that somehow it would magically change my appearance into this new beautiful woman who actually liked herself... but it never did. Most of the time it had the opposite effect. I'd build up this expectation for my new hair to transform me into this beautiful image of perfection and when it didn't I was heartbroken and hated myself even more. πŸ’‡
I never really liked my hair. I hoped that if I changed it enough, one day I would find that perfect style that made me beautiful. But my hair wasn't the problem. I was changing my appearance because I didn't like it and wanted to look like someone else. Someone I was never going to look like because I'm always going to look like me. No haircut can change that. πŸ’‡
So over the last few years I decided to stop changing my hair. To go back to my natural colour and let my hair grow out. At first it was difficult, I didn't like how it looked and wanted to change it but after a while I fell in love my natural hair. I began to appreciate it for how it naturally looks. How my curls change day to day. How I can just get up and go and leave my hair to do whatever it wants that day. πŸ’‡
Don't get me wrong sometimes I really enjoy styling my hair and I am absolutely, in no way shaming anyone who does change their hair. It is a great way of expressing yourself and showing yourself self care. However I wasn't changing my hair for those reasons. I was changing it to try fix my body image issues and that was never going to happen. If you don't like who you are a haircut isn't going to change that. πŸ’‡
Whereas when I started embracing myself and by fault my hair for all that it is, I actually started to defeat those demons and see beauty in myself and my hair that I'd never seen before. I realised that a lot of the time I don't want to spend ages styling it and that actually it's perfectly acceptable just as it is. πŸ’‡
Don't feel the need to change your hair all the time just to look a certain way. If you don't want to style it, don't bother. You're beautiful just the way you are! No hairstyle is going to change that.

Repost for anyone who hasn't already please go check out it is an incredible page all about eating disorders and ED recovery that is beautifully illustrated.
Happy Easter everybody!
Easter can be a really difficult time. Like most holidays it revolves around food and when you are struggling with an ED that is incredibly difficult. So make sure you are looking after yourself first! Do what you need to do to make this period of time easier. But please remember you do not need to fast, restrict, purge or exercise to 'make up' for eating. YOU ARE ALLOWED TO EAT!
It doesn't matter if you have eaten more than you normally do, YOU STILL NEED TO EAT! 🐰
It doesn't matter if you've eaten different foods to what you normally do, YOU STILL NEED TO EAT! πŸ₯
You do not need to 'make up' for eating in anyway! 🐰
If you are finding the holidays particularly difficult or triggering talk to someone. Use your support network. Explain what's going on and try identify the best way to get through it. If someone doesn't understand and says something insensitive tell them, use it as a chance to educate them. 🐣
Enjoy the holiday in the best way you can but remember it is just a day like any other day. The sun will set and you will keep living.

This is my body. It doesn't look like the ones you see in magazines. My stomach isn't flat. My bum isn't big. My thighs touch. I have scars, stretch marks and cellulite. πŸ’›

This is my body. It doesn't look the opposite to the ones you see in magazines. It fits conventional beauty standards. It doesn't face oppression. It doesn't challenge stigmas. πŸ’›

This is my body. The one I thought was so awful. The one I thought was shameful and wrong. The one I so desperately wanted to change. The one I would of given anything to look like the ones we see in magazines. πŸ’›

This is my body. The one I hated so passionately. The one I wished would disappear. The one I starved, berated and abused. The one I put through hell and back, all to look like the ones we see in magazines. πŸ’›

This is my body. The one I've had since birth. This is its shape. What it looks like. No more, no less. It doesn't need to look like the ones we see in magazines. πŸ’›

This is my body. The one that never gave up on me. The one that supported me through everything. The one that allowed me to grow. The one that waited patiently until I was ready to treat it the way it deserves. πŸ’›

This is my body. The only one I've got. The one I love. The one I nourish. The one I treat kindly and speak gently to. The one that's no longer empty but full. Full of love, full of life and full of happiness. πŸ’›

This is my body. The one I vow to treat better than I did before. The housing to my soul. The one that's beauty was never measured by its similarity to the ones we see in magazines at all.

PREACH!!! πŸ™ŒπŸ™ŒπŸ™Œ Repost @plusbabygirl

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