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derbz_forpresident derbz_forpresident

501 posts   1241 followers   2846 followings

derbz  |New Orleans| alcohol enthusiast. whiskey advocate. beardo. sun worshiper. home is Colorado, Dennis is the dog, Splinter is the squirrel. I'm Zach.

today i’m channeling #peggyBundy, eating #bonbons and watchin movies.

it’s lit. pain pills and ex got me like woah. didn’t really tell anyone but Peach had an adventure and sprained my ankle. fast forward two days later and Im helping my boyfriend decorating for a party -yesss he’s a party planner, they had my limpin ass climbs up the scaffolding and that sumbitch collapses right away and but what do I land on? the same damn prefucked up ankle. was wearing a brace since the beginning. themnnnn the NYE my fuckin goofy ass trips on a rug in the living room and, YOU GUESSED IT- the same now three times fucked up sprained ankle. fancier brace and keeping it light duty. #iceelevaterestrepeat #halp #sendsoup #maybeacouplelawyers #spnapchatrollsgotlike #ayeeeee

four year old me. I could drive a snowmobile before I could ride a bike. #1986 #oldsnowmass #weebensplace #colorado

merry christmas

hello lover @fauxluv

send lawyers, guns and money.
for real tho.
i honestly hope your day is as nice as my ass.
byeeeee

#lawyerup #bitchbetterhavemymoney #bigbootyjudy

winterized the back yard with boo n the dogs. this week suspension from work has been a blessing in the way that I have so much time on my hands to do the shit I’d normally be too fuckin tired to do. the not blessed part is a weeks fuckin pay cut, in December just mere weeks from holiday times. silver linings, gotta keep lookin for the silver linings...

never had an orchid bloom for me- bare stalk to flower- in all my life! little did I know all I had to do was to put it up on the high shelf in the bathroom then forget and OH SHIT I BETTER WATER THAT THING once a month. #greenthumbanyway #bathroomorchid maybe I should get a few more? I’m sure I can forget about them too! bathroom orchids will be trending before you know it. 🤓 when the xanbar creeeps and u been smokin wax and all the sudden you can’t figure out how you got so fucked up off wax. #its420somewhere #waxnxan #alldaybaybay

heard a noise in the living room, come to find this bitch done broke into my house and is drinking my beer.

we had a fall party at the house the other night and friends carved and painted pumpkins. so much fun! lookin spooky! happy halloween y'all #trickortreat #myfrontporch #jackolantern #nolaliving #followyournola

this shit is really annoying. I want to get out of bed and be productive and go to work and make money and see my friends and talk on the phone and answer the door when someone knocks and go out for dinner and go to the movies and just be normal but sometimes I can't even pull it together enough to leave the house. anxiety is real and it's hard to deal with. I'm having one of those days.

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