deemoi deemoi

1,719 posts   61,987 followers   171 followings

deemoi  Artist, yoga teacher, traveller, climber, cyclist, mother, master procrastinator, liberal user of the f**k word, lover of love & all things bright

KARMIC payback? F*CK THAT!
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I'll take KARMIC pardon instead...
This concept of KARMA goes both ways: "karmic retribution" for the bad inflicted upon me and "Karmic incentive" for me to be a good person...
ok, I get the incentive bit: to think about my actions and their impact on others and to know that choices made in accordance to a good moral compass (behaving ethically, not lying, cheating or being a downright asshole) give me peace...
It's the retribution I have a problem with: this talk of assurance that that if someone behaved like a douche, then karma will come back and bite them in the ass...
Really!?
Do you ever see the Bitch-Slapping Glove of Justice descend from the heavens to punish someone for being a dic***ead??!
let's get real! Assholes often get away with their actions without consequences...
The fact remains that some jerks roam this earth living it large on beds of roses and often get away with it...
So What's the point of Karmic retribution except some delusional story I told myself to feel some justice for the injustice someone inflicted upon me?
The point is simple: Karma is not about others, it's about myself...
Karma is a personal code of conduct that allows me to become a better version of myself, to rise to a higher frequency and start to attract people who resonate deeply with what I’m all about.
Karma isn't some spiritual sceptre designed to strike the jerks who mess me up...
Today I am making a promise to myself to forget about all the assholes who screwed me up and stop hoping they will somehow payback!? I trust that the way they treated me is their own karmic lesson and how I react to their actions is mine!
Karma is the personal path I walk, the life that I live, the things I manifest, and the awareness that I am worthy of something higher, lighter, more fulfilling, and maybe even everlasting....#dothework

LOVE TO HEARTBREAK...
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If you had asked me a few years ago what Heartbreak meant for me, I would have told you “great suffering and loss induced by failed relationships”...
But today, I have a different story to tell about my heart being broken. It has been broken when a relationship ended, when I’ve been cheated on, when I had cancer, when my daughter was struggling, when my partner battled with depression, when I was depressed, when I lost my job, when my boyfriend struggled with addiction, when I was abused, when my friend died, when...when...when...heartbreak is the name of all of my suffering, my yellow brick road to hell. It is the reason why my scars don’t fade. It is the reason why I put up walls, shut down, and drown in an unfathomable darkness. Heartbreak feels wrong, violent, unfair and unjust. It feels like some punishment for a great sin I have committed, some retribution for past karma...
Yet! Heartbreak has been the biggest blessing in my life, a perverted and fucked up tool for growth, an imperfect conduit for leaning, the Alcatraz from which I have finally learned the meaning of...LOVE.
I finally get it.
My heart had to break in so many ways and so many times for the light to filter through the cracks and show me what love really is. In this new space of clarity and light, I see that heartbreak is the right of passage to unconditional love, the kind of love that transcends hurt, ego, anger, jealousy and attachment...the kind of love that lasts even when everything and everyone is gone. They call it universal love, it fluctuates so much higher than the romantic love and shines a thousand times brighter!
I welcome heartbreak, every type and shape and form it embodies, because I now know that what looks like destruction is but the winding road towards true freedom... #dothework

MINDFUL EATING!
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I get asked a lot what’s my diet? And the truth is I don’t have a diet, what I do have is a mindful eating practise, something I have trained myself to do just as I have trained myself to practise Yoga.
Diets never worked for me. I would lose the weight only to put it back when I digressed from my meal plans. Even when I stuck the weight loss for as long as a year, I would eventually put those pounds back and spend months torturing myself for my inability to successfully diet...
Dieting sucks!
Mindful eating, on the other hand, is long lasting and has enabled me to stick to the same weight for 10 years (give and take 2 kilos on and off) .
Mindful eating taught me to listen to the language of my body and mindfully make good dietary choices.
It’s not about stuffing myself with the latest superfoods or depriving myself of carbs and sugars. It’s not so much about WHAT I eat and more about HOW I eat it.
First, I eat in moderation, I stop before I’m full and I have small portions and a variety of food groups on one plate. Second, I eat super slowly and pay so much attention to the act of eating, dedicating at least half an hour to eat every meal, I chew my food and focus on the texture and the taste. I observe how I feel during and after my meal (and take notes). This attention I paid to eating opened up my awareness to my eating urges and the emotions that triggered eating.
I stopped eating for comfort or snacking for boredom, I ate because I was hungry.
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The shifts came slowly for sure but with attention, so many of my eating habits changed and I found myself falling into a way of eating that is healthy and balanced. Without even trying, I eliminated unhealthy food out of my diet and allowed myself to enjoy beautiful meals without guilt.
I went from mindless eating to mindful eating and food became a journey of pleasure, a sort of meditation that enabled me to be fully present and looking lean without dieting...
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Ps: I don’t eat chicken, red meat, and substitute all dairy products with non dairy alternatives. I do eat fish and I love baking breads and eating homemade cakes... #bemindful

NEW YORK - NEW YORK...
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I’m coming to you on from May 30th to June 5th.
HELP ME!!!
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▶️ where shall I teach?.... Do you have names of studios I can email to check if I can run a workshop while I’m there?
▶️ where shall I stay?....I stayed at the Ace hotel in Manhattan last time, but I am open to more adventurous options 😊
▶️ where shall I practise?...any workshops: dance, yoga, mobility, or NLP that are going on while I’m there?
▶️where shall I go for vintage clothing?
▶️ what restaurants/bars/night clubs/ swing clubs (I’m kidding) shall I visit?
▶️who wants to have a coffee with me? 🙈😉
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DM me!
I can’t wait...

FU**ING TRUTH!?...
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I have been chasing “the truth” for 15 years. I was so intimidated by the weight of the word “truth”, I felt ill equipped to walk the path. I tried so hard and I failed.
The “truth" has been glorified and made to look too beautiful and perfect for my brokenness to handle, an elevated quest for personal freedom, a spiritual endeavour to add a pinch of virtuous meaning to my confused identity...
No fucking wonder I failed at living an authentic and empowered life!
I was chasing beauty when I should have embraced imperfection and ugliness.
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We hide the truth's truth, we dance around big scary words and we never speak them out loud, never face them head on. Abandonment? Shame? Guilt? Abuse? Trauma? Depression? Violence? addiction?...no...that's not the truth, that's not my truth...and this sense of conscious denial becomes our new truth, we say one thing, mean another and live in complete conflict and dissonance.
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The truth isn’t a beautiful thing, and it most certainly doesn’t mean universal alignment with love and kindness.
The truth is whatever the fuck you need to do and whomever you need to be. Living in your truth is defining your identity and being free to peruse it irrespective of whether anyone else approves of it or aligns with its values.
If you wish to define yourself by your bank account, then your truth is to work hard at climbing the success ladder.
If you wish to define yourself by your spiritual values, then your truth is to move from love at all costs.
If you wish to be a hustler, then your truth is to live strategically and move with calculated steps.
You are a true person if you say what you mean and mean what you say, if you live in accordance with your own convictions.
You are a true person when you drop the bullshit and accept that beneath the glorification of “be true” is often the unconfined forces of pain and trauma and the hardships we must go through to heal ourselves.
There is nothing beautiful about the truth.
“Beauty does more than simply seduce: it masks and perfumes, freezes moral categories in place. Ugliness—with all its seams unconcealed—is sometimes the closest thing to the truth”...#aimtrue

We fight everyday against the creeping negativity and suffering of this world.
We struggle daily against the subtle ripples of cynicism, the defeating attitudes of disappointed idealists, the crushing self-righteousness of the ignorant...
We swallow the bitter pills of those who judge, those who hate, those who wage wars...
Still...
However much we sometimes find it tough to be on planet earth, discouragement and dispiritedness aren't the real perils of life, our own emotional and mental manifestations are!
These are the things we can control!
These are the things we can change!
We have to cut through them!
We have to cut through our own self created delusions to find the underlying truth...and the truth is that underneath our innermost nature and beneath all the shit we have to wade through, we are our own awareness.
We are light.
We are love.
We aren't hate.
We aren't greed.
We aren't anger...
We have the choice to strengthen the hold of our "loving self" and weaken the hold of everything else...
#dothework #befearless #aimtrue #loveyourbody

TO OWN MY POWER...
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To own my power, I have to move on from what hurt me but never forget what it taught me.

To own my power, I have to own my shit. I have to know that I am the maker of all my experiences even the ones where my experience is painful.
To own my power is to acknowledge that I am broken first, then find the support and the healing necessary to transform what is broken in me.

To own my power, is to see my unhappiness as self sabotaging patterns and not the universe fucking with me.

To own my power, is to be proud of being a woman, and make my own rules on how I wish to go about my journey of womanhood.

To own my power is to honour my passions, to believe that I am worthy of perusing them and to act in a way that reflects my commitment to them.

To own my power, is to accept that being afraid and failing is part of the journey and that we grow and find our purpose by just getting on with life anyway.

To own my power, is to forgive and bear the scars that hurt me.

To own my power is to empower other... #dothework

FLOW...
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Practising yoga on a moored Yacht in a rain storm when the deck is swaying like crazy is a powerful exercise in embracing non ideal situations...
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I contemplated missing out on my morning practise. How the fuck am I to flow when the deck is swaying like a tree in the wind?
Then it occurred to me to embrace the situation rather than resist it and see how my practise unfolds and what shows up for me.
It was beautiful.
So beautiful.
I was flowing with the deck, with the sea, with the boat’s lulling motion.
I didn’t know how the sequence would unfold, I just rolled with it and allowed my body to follow the natural rhythm of the swaying boat...
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Challenges, uncomfortable as they may be, also afford us an golden opportunity for learning through experience.
My practise this morning connected me to a powerful lesson I had not thought about for a while: dark situations are an opportunity for growth and wisdom blossoms out of embracing our suffering.
Life is made of ebbs and flows and the only way to live fully is to flow with it... #flow #dothework #monaco #yogaeveryday

LOADED LOVE...
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The romantic love can be loaded with much ego. We need love to make us feel good, safe, loved, empowered and often validated. We want love to cover up what we are hiding and give us an escape from making the hard choice of facing our darkness.
Love is not the lyrics of a love song, it’s not Shakespearean sonnets, it is not loose associations, and for all those reasons we end up missing out on love when we are deep in love...then one day love turns to hate and bitterness, control and games, and we wonder where did it all go wrong?
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In fact, I’ve come to see that the romantic love distracts the mind from experiencing love authentically. Authentic love exists when the ego is at rest, when our masks and presences are dropped and we reveal ourselves to each other with unwavering vulnerability. Authentic love penetrates deep into the layers of ourselves and others without shrinking at the shadows we find.It allows us to see and be seen. Authentic loves demands that we love ourself enough to want to give ourself to another. This kind of love isn’t so concerned with the value others bring to us...
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I’ve stepped into a new phase, and come to think of it, I’ve been stepping into it gradually over the last year. I am redefining the romantic love for the experience of authentic love.
I’m stepping away from the mindless dribble of confused love songs, confused authors, confused past experiences, confused definitions and pointless conversations about love...I’m stepping away from the facade of love, the perishable masquerade of attachment and value. I’m releasing the price tags of love and making it a priceless experience, something I want to share peacefully and honestly. I have connected to this kind of love and its power drives me everyday to aim at living from a place of greater authenticity... #dothework #aimtrue #betrue

Can you imagine if listening to others is rooted in our ability to listen to ourselves?
Can you contemplate a life in which the root of our trust in others is trust in ourselves?
How sweet would every moment be if we understood that understanding can only come from having understood ourselves first?
How powerful would our connection to others be if we connected with our own flaws?
How magical would every breath we take feel if we focused on being interested rather than being interesting?...#dothework #aimtrue

I am a serial lover.
I am a love addict.
I love because love is the one true adventure.
I am what I give importance to and I give importance to love.
I am love...
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#morocco #moroccotravel #sahara #adventure #outdoorisfree #yogaeverywhere #yogaeveryday #yogainspiration #yogaposes #playwithdee

THE SPIRIT IS A DEMANDING BITCH...
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The spiritual path demands the practise of awareness.
Awareness demands waking up to personal realisations.
Personal realisations are hard to acknowledge because they are often dark in nature. They are personal truths that are tough to face because their shadow peers back at us showing us a dissonance within that we have (so far) refused to acknowledge...
The spiritual path is brutal.
The more I walk this path, the more layers I peel and the more I realise that I will never arrive.
The trite cliché that life is a journey and not a destination resonates with me right now more than ever...I feel as if my soul is observing the lessons and a layer I didn't know I was carrying is peeling off...With such clarity comes the painful realisation that the shadows inhabit me still and will inhabit me always.
I must learn to embrace them further so that I can deepen my detachment towards them and let go of the need to put a meaning to them.
Meaningful as they are, my shadows are meaningless. They are but a stepping stone, to help me move through attachment, cleaning old wounds, clearing the way for deeper personal transformation...#dothework

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