danesnaptiste danesnaptiste

276 posts   3368 followers   3026 followings

Dane Baptiste  Comedy and pictures. Pretty much. I was a badman on MySpace ask Carlos. http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p04f23s0/episodes/player

http://www.danebaptiste.co.uk/

Those that know; know. @comedystorelondon settings this weekend. Come down if you're about.

I've just been struck by an angel. I've heard about this lady but never seen her in real life.
Her voice live is amazing; you know how good your vocal range has to be to compete with rush hour traffic?
And to be able to uplift spirits young and old at a tube station after work is an amazing feat. But she was doing it. But who is she? I don't know but she'll be gone by midnight!

Help me find out who SINGDERELLA is yall!
#blackgirlmagic #BlackgirlsRock #Iwillmanageher #ButnotlikeIkeTurner #Britainsgottalent #withhumanstoo #notjustdogs

Attention everybody on both sides of the Atlantic! Next week I will be going to CANADA (where Justin Bieber, Drake and Maple Syrup come from) to perform @justforlaughs festival!

Even more happy to tell you I'll be appearing on @kevinhart4real's LOL Comedy network's showcase on the 27th July!

Stay tuned for more info! 🙌🏾💯♥️🇨🇦

Mosaic of yesterday's new friend spectacular! Friendly Food; Funny Familiar Family Forming!

Look at the strength! Of our new bonds. At this rate, you'll be calling me 'Danesley Harriott' once I graduate from @schoolofwok!

Shout out to Helen for dealing with the divaisms in the green from. I simply won't ENTERTAIN Coke Zero
Please keep supporting and watching all the tings y'all! Also anybody that has a clothing line that you think would fit me, let me know because I have more TV appearances than clothes on wardrobe in the near future, so happy for any assistance in getting the swag together.
Please independent clothing lines; help me to help myself!

Loveliest day filming @sundaybrunchc4. Such a lovely bunch of crew as well as this Girl & Gary gang @gary.lucy @raye @myannaburing. @katenash in the back looking for a turnbuckle and steel chair

Great time @latitudefest 2017! Look who was in the house! @susiewoosie12, @joeldommett @maddyanholt @steve! And the lovely folk @shaunkeavney's @bbc6music show w @robinince and the gang!

Had a good time, didn't have a bowel movement in 48 hours, because my parents grew up without shoes, and used latrines. Once my aunt had to drown puppies in Grenada, so we know sufferation.

Another visit of GOD this time to @2northdown Thanks to everyone that came and supported and special shout out to top Blacktress and support AJ @adele_jjames! Check out #TWSS and #Lightie by @lynettelinton1 starring this legend!

This Sunday!!! Nurse your hangovers and increase your lie-in pleasure with @sundaybrunchc4 with these legends and my don from day long @Joe lycett. Tune in this Sunday!
No nuts and no pork 😊

''Twas a time when we would ridicule African players from 'Pays Francophones' for their ostentatious hairstyles, but this news article proves why it's necessary.
Also it's important to remember computer games weren't as advanced when FIFA and pro came out, so one needed to stand out when you were being made into a player.
But in the 21st century with all the OLED, LED, HDTV, Plasma and 1,080 resolution, if you can find Osama in Pakistan when he has 23+ brothers, you can distinguish between two black men.
And you all thought Gervinho just had a mad head, but he knew wa gwarn. Shout out Drogba and Balotelli too.

Back with the Cherubim that is @gemagain doing a show for @bbc6music talking, love hate, Gods, Angels, Demons and Gold, Oil and Drugs.
During our SunnyD discussion; we also realise that Will Smith had every Blacktress working in the 90s as his girlfriend, and the same should happen for me in Season 2. @sasha_frost, it's Gemma's idea.
@officialjamelia @aleshaofficial @su_elise @keishabuchanan @official_mutyabuena I'm just saying.....🙌🏾♥️♥️♥️😍😍😍 Tune in this Saturday, and watch SunnyD on @bbcthree!

#TBT Circa 2004; judging by the jumper, before I dropped by musical debut to my 28 MySpace fans entitled "brandy and bootcuts"

Few people are aware of this EP; but the meticulously crafted piece included the following tracks:

1. Trocadero Chirpsing
2. All for an Avirex
3. Zarching (Versace funk)
4. Probito Money
5. Mama can I get a moped
6. Bald fade rap
7. Requiem for a hairline
8. Trocadero Chirpsing (house phone remix)
9. Zone 6 girl ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️The guardian
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️The Onserver
"A masterpiece in his head"- The Telegraph
"What the f*ck are you talking about?"- My sister
Stay tuned for the next project, where I'll be producing my own fan fiction "Harry Potter and the Dutch pot of mystery"
Coming 2019.
#throwbackthursday #MCN #Mancrushnever #Imisshavinghair #TBT

Great gig for @standupforsatire tonight and a privilege to be on stage with @almurray @robinince @burns.brendon @kgodliman (not pictured, obviously, durr)
Keep supporting live comedy and fighting against censorship. And by that I don't mean shock comedy that you know would get you rushed in real life.

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