I don’t usually like writing long captions but I do like to being honest. Today I had a bad day... I was stressed with school, I felt ugly, I felt fat, my skin’s completely broken out, and on top of that I had to go to a casting (which on days like this, being professionally judged is the last thing I want to to.) My immediate response to feeling like this was to post on social media and act like I was having an amazing day as a model... So I found this photo. I which I liked, but what made me sad was actually my first reaction was: “I look so fat.” Then “I need make my waist smaller”, “clear my skin”, etc.
it made me emotional because truthfully I know I’m beautiful and I know I am skinny and I have no idea why my first reaction to such a beautiful photo was to edit myself down. It was a wake up call because I realized the reason I felt like doing that is because every single person I follow on social media does it too, and I am all for someone fixing what they don’t like if it makes them happy but I was doing this because I was ashamed. And I don’t want to lie — it’s ok to not have a waist that shocks people when they see it or ribs that poke out or skin thats as smooth as a babies — no one does, we’re just all really good at faking it and for some reason it gives us validation. I am posting this not for attention but more because I’m taking a stand. I’m going to be more honest on here, I’m deleting facetune, I’m embracing my flaws and I’m learning to love myself. I don’t want to be an addition to the negative part of social media that I hate.