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Seiji Ishii  Motorsports fitness trainer, adventure/action sports writer, rock climbing guide/coach, rookie father. Skratch Labs Ambassador.

Day 31/18 Post Op. My current life schedule is strictly ruled by self-administered IV’s through a PICC line that has been in my body since the second surgery. This schedule and line deliver joint/limb/lifesaving antibiotics to right above my superior vena cava, the “main vein.” This is like an express lane to your circulatory system, and a smart junkie would pursue one at all costs. I have to carry a pretty large kit of several components to execute an infusion; traveling to therapy, etc requires careful planning and I carry a backup as well. When I left the rehab hospital, the most critical thing was if my next dose would be at home and luckily the meds made it with 45 min to spare. 8 am/4 pm/midnight (1 hour window), cornerstones that will be around for 6 weeks in total. Onward. #aclrecovery #staphinfection

You know where this is? Well, I’ll tell you where it’s not - it’s not the effin hospital! Just got home and saw this flower bouquet @jamcollective sent. Just a confirmation that I work in the best industry in the world. A heartfelt thanks to the ladies at that PR firm for putting the 🍒 on top of my homecoming. I already feel so much more relaxed and my sort-of claustrophobia has vanished. So happy to be home with my family and pets. 17 days at the hospital, what a trip, and it’s far from over. Time to go full throttle on the healing and therapy. Moving that rock, day by day. 👊

Day 17. Made small milestones, things normally taken for granted, but small steps eventually lead to bigger goals: I peed like a normal dude, standing on two feet, transferred solo into a car and figured out how to configure it so I could wear a seat belt with my locked-straight brace on, and stood long enough with both hands free to finally shave. And good thing I got cleaned up because THIS guy is going home tomorrow! I need to thank the numerous visitors, some coming from very far. They were truly spirit lifting and I won’t forget. And to my wife Shay and daughter Sequoia who were here almost 24/7 (Sequoia voluntarily stayed overnight all nights except the first one). Shay deserves a gold medal, especially for the first week where I was so doped out on dialaudid that I was worthless in self-care. This challenge is far from over but I predict huge changes from being in my familiar surroundings and having my own, trusted PT. Onward. #aclrecovery #staphinfection

Pre dawn thoughts, Day 17. I’ve had lots of time to think; someone suggested that I reminisce and look back at my life to provide a framework to display that overall, including this relatively short time of struggle, my life is wonderful. I spent 11 years working in motocross and supercross full time. They were exciting times, and I had experiences that I’ll cherish forever. But the most valuable outcome of those times are the relationships forged while chasing dreams that still thrive today. @andrewshort29 hates hospitals; he visited me after my second procedure in the recovery rooms, and caught a bug that made him sick. As soon as he got well, he visited me again in acute care before he had to leave on a training trip. I have been on the other side of the hospital bed with Shorty numerous times and draw strength from how he handled the pain right in front of me, both post-op and during therapy and training afterwards. @narc0nate can’t visit, but I know he would, and I’ve been through similar times with him, but in reverse with him in the hospital. Sometimes I miss the races, the training, etc. but mostly I miss the other times that had nothing to do with racing, both good and bad. I guess what I’m saying is I just miss my friends and I’m so fortunate to have so many. When I get out, heal, and get back to normal, I can already tell that I will certainly create more space to just hang out with friends, even more than I do now, and to make an extra effort to overcome whatever obstacles are there to visit the ones that aren’t around all the time. This photo to me, represents the true “Dream Team,” not because of any ability to do well at races, but because of the mix of humanity it really was. We were so different in beliefs, opinions, backgrounds, upbringing, problems, worries....but we made it work, we were there for each other and we still are. I’ll just stop because it’s unexplainable. Just know; it was the most improbable mix on the surface but it was the Dream Team both on and off the track. Damn. I miss these guys.

Mondaze. Day 16 at the hospital. The other day they finally let me lift weights. They handed me unmarked weights and said to do shoulder press in the wheelchair. I was stoked and asked for the rep scheme, which was 4x8, which is exactly what I do at home. I did my sets, my delts were wasted and I dropped the weights. I asked how much they were and the therapist answered “three pounds.” I felt the cogs of my mind grind to a stop and attempt to restart. I put three fingers up, and I pointed out each one with my other hand, and the therapist nodded yes. The day before my accident I used 45s. When therapy gets painful, I picture a man walking out and moving a rock one step forward. The dirt road goes uphill, but I can see the summit where the rock will finally sit. When she nodded to confirm three pounds, the road went flat, became a paved highway that extended towards the vanishing point. The rest of the day, the cogs were stuck. It was my first opportunity for a direct comparison to before all the mayhem. Reality check, and checkmate for the day. But today, I walked out on that m’fin highway, and dammit, I picked up that rock and moved it one step foreword. #aclrecovery #staphinfection

The day just got a whole lot better here in the hospital...Day 15.

I have thought a lot “I don’t deserve this.” Yesterday @troywilsonatx @ericawrrtx and Shay’s parents spent the day building ramps at my house so it would be safer when I get there. I don’t deserve that either, but I got it. Deep gratitude doesn’t even get close. Amazing support without asking. Unreal.

After 14 days in the hospital, I finally got to go outside for a bit, and it was glorious. My climbing athletes that I train all came and visited, and a Moto friend visited and dropped off a few simple things to help stave off cabin fever. My money is dwindling by the day as I cannot work, but I’m rich. So many deep thanks to give, you all know who you are and tagging you seems almost like disrespect because you know what all this means to me. Much love ❤️ #aclrecovery #staphinfection

It’s no secret that I have been estranged from my parents for most of my adult life. I used to have a chip on my shoulder about anyone that had supportive parents. As I grew older, I realized that my friends more than made up for that, and ultimately surpassed anything I could have ever wanted out of my own parents. This “family” extends far and wide, and I feel rich in that regard. This message was extremely heartwarming. The man in the middle is Emilio. When I was in my 20’s my friends would of course go visit their families during Christmas. I didn’t want to be alone so I would go to El Potrero Chico in Hidalgo, NL, Mexico and spend the holidays there. Emilio is deaf and mute, but we would “talk” late into the night, warmed by campfire and lubricated with beer. We truly communicated with grunts and hand motions and his ability to somewhat read lips. Those are some of my most cherished memories. We are both growing older, but the love is still young. I can’t wait to get well, get my van done, and have Emilio meet my family for the first time. The lady in the front is Luly, wife of Homero Jr. and all climbers of the Potrero owe a huge amount of gratitude to his father, the first to open his arms to American climbers. He also called me “Martin” because my name made no sense to him lol.♥️

Day 13. Therapy was painful today, but I moved my rock a little step out to the life I used to have. The steps are small right now, but they are forward. The hospital life is starting to wear on me, I really miss being home with my family, dogs, and cat, but hopefully soon I will be there. I have been humbled and beaten to the ground but I’m starting to fight back a little harder; just being able to go home will be a huge victory. And staph can go F itself. #aclrecovery

Day 11. Can’t believe it. The original ACL reconstruction had me home the same day. Today’s functional goals, all with the knee immobilizer on: get out of bed unassisted, get on/off toilet unassisted, 100 steps with crutches (first day I could even hold myself up on crutches). I learned how to take a shower, and two therapists had to help me. I did all of them plus PT. I am wasted and have the same sick feeling I have when I do 4 day alpine climbs and I’m finally down. When I see my program for the day, it’s like I’m looking at a wholly different person, who looks at my old self and thinks, “I’ll never be that guy.” After the first surgery, I didn’t have to deal with the massive overall muscle loss of three weeks of not being in gravity and infection. I crutched it into the car straight out of OR. These realities are so hard to take. But today was the biggest day thus far, and I need to accept the past, stay in the present, and quit looking into the future. Sequoia has been around a lot these last few days, and she’s all the motivation I need to get past this part of rehab; I just want to go home. #aclrecovery

Today was my first PT session at the rehabilitation hospital. I have never, ever felt pain like I had today as they hung my leg free into extension. My entire chain of muscles from my shoulder girdle through the calf of my leg quivered uncontrollably, then the PT reamed into my hamstring with her elbow. She told me to let her know when I needed a break. My face was buried in a pillow, eyes clamped shut, and I had to go inside myself for the first time since my bicycle racing days. I couldn’t hear anything and when I felt my breath change, about to say stop, I would envision a man, walking out and moving his rock one more step out. And I would tell myself, “I want to go home to Sequoia.” I never took a break for the entire 90 min session. For almost 3 hours post session, the pain never let off, but I didn’t ask for more meds. It has finally subsided and I’m finally crying. I don’t know what the formula is here to calculate when they will release me to go home, but I’m fucking not going to take a break and they will never see me cry or hear me wimper. In my heart I hate them but in my mind I know they are helping me go home. #aclrecovery

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