Everything I believe in was tested.
I questioned my faith, back to back!
I failed, too many times.
My body changed, and I tried to change it. Failed.
Health took a drastic nosedive.
Lots of NOs.
A couple of Yes.
Tears. More tears.
The strength I thought I had was nowhere to be found. Everything happened so fast, I lost control. *newsflash* I TAKE JOY IN being in control. So, guess what happened? Yep. That's right! Lost.
It felt like the year dragged on; half of the goals I set just dissolved, almost nothing to show for it.
I struggled with surrendering, and I got the most intense drilling of my life yet.
Thankful for His mercies, for the people God has intentionally (even in my ignorance) blessed me with.
Grateful for the ones that helped pull me out of the quicksand.
For the longest time, Vulnerability had never been my thing. Nah, I'd rather hide and mask as much as I can.
I still haven't figured how to do this, and I have to consciously practice now, as Lumina has taught me to "show my workings", one step at a time.
So, thank you, 2018, you were used to school a girl on:
The real, important things.
Intentional association and relationships.
Putting my best into everything I do.
I get 365 new opportunities to do better, do it afraid, to get back to the drawing board.
A little faith, more courage.
Practical living. Gratitude.
Openness. Guts. Showing up. Living.
Here's to breaking forth and building new experiences.