I don’t usually post things like this, but I figured this was the first step.
When I moved away to Hawaii, I left behind a lot of what not only kept me sane, but things that made me, ME - A job that made me independent. Family that helped me. Friends who were a drive away. My car that gave me freedom. The ability to go to the gym that made me feel good about myself.
I was depressed the first month being here. I cried almost everyday. I was tired, stressed, alone. I had no motivation, no energy. My self-confidence and self-esteem diminished almost completely.
Don’t get me wrong, the chance to be a stay at home mom is a blessing. The opportunity to explore more than San Diego is amazing. But a lot of my sadness came from the way I saw myself in the mirror.
I constantly compared myself to other women’s postpartum fitness journeys. To girls who never even had a baby. And it took awhile for me to mentally and emotionally believe that everyone’s journey was different. One could be easier or harder than the other. And mines was definitely not on the easier side.
So, Im posting this because I actually felt good about myself today. I didn’t look in the mirror in disgust. I didn’t feel the need to cry. I didn’t feel the need to change my clothes.
I may be 11 months post-partum. But here’s to finally and officially starting my journey to a better me - Physically and mentally.