My pops is dying. It's a hard and fucked up reality that we have been facing since August 2007 when he was diagnosed with prostate cancer. After 26 chemotherapy sessions, 60 radiation treatments (plus 6 radium 223), 6 blood transfusions, 4 Provenge immunotherapy treatments, hundreds of blood tests and 30 Lupron shots - he is home on hospice. We don't know when, but we know he will be gone soon.
This was taken tonight as we watched TV in his bed. We got to tell him all the nice things on our mind about him before he fell back asleep. He held Heather's hand as she cried. She has adopted him as a second dad, too. A fantastic Papa to our girls - it destroys us to know they won't fully have him in their lives like we had hoped.
In a weird way, me writing this on the internet helps me cope. Sorry it's somber. I don't need sympathy...I just want to publicly put it out to the universe that we are losing a good man. A good husband. A good dad. A good papa. Though I met him when I was 20, and I was pretty set in my ways by then, that's the age I started to learn how to be a man. A man works hard and doesn't complain. A man puts his family first. A man makes sure everyone around him is happy before he thinks of himself. A man does the heavy lifting. A man is a rock.
Kent, I learned all of the above from you. Obviously, my mom shaped who I am today in most ways, but I learned how to be a man, and most importantly, a father - from you. Things I have heard you say to my mom, or things you have said to me resonate inside me as life lessons I'll never forget. When I fucked up...you wanted me to learn from it, not lecture me. Anyone who will marry a women while she was in the middle of breast cancer treatment was someone I could look up to forever. The way you look after my mom will mean more to me that you'll ever comprehend. The way you took the time to make sure my grandma was always OK will always be something I try to emulate. To this day she gleams about you. We all do.
I'm rambling at this point. But I love you, Pops...you won't be here much longer but you'll be here forever at the same time. ❤️