beathetree beathetree

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Bea Marshall  Intuitive Parenting Coach | TEDx Speaker | Founder of Yes Parenting | Helping Mums to embrace the magic of YES!

http://www.beamarshall.com/parenting-without-punishment

It's really hard to selfie a flower in your hair but I wanted to because Jos (my 11yr old) brought this in from the garden and placed it in my hair.
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He does this every now and then - brings a single flower and puts it in my hair.
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He has hot, sweaty and often smelly hands (even 30 seconds after washing with soap and water!!) and yet he is so delicate and gentle with those hands.
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He handles small insects, lizards, frogs, catches flies between his fingers and places delicate flowers in my hair.
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Often it's the small things that say the most.

15 minutes of meditation before I get started on my emails.
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For too long the universe and my inner knowing (possibly the same source!) have been calling me to meditation and to trust my intuition in my work and my life.
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What you resist, persists. So, despite turning a blind eye to these persistent nudges they haven't ceased. If anything, they've got clearer! And now they are using other areas of my life to speak to me.
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So I'm posting this as a form of accountability. I use brain.fm to support my meditation practise as well as to support my brain when it needs to focus. I love it - I've been using it for months (mostly for focus because I've largely avoided meditation - see above).
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Thank you to @tempestbeauty for her time-lapse meditation videos which inspired me to make my own.
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And yes, I'm wearing a woolly hat and a scarf and it's August!!! If you look carefully you'll see a smile break onto my face during the video - that's when I felt the sun come through for a moment. So much joy in that light and warmth!
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What are you resisting?
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Love Bea x

Today this beautiful boy turned 13.
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I remember that labour so clearly and his entrance into the world. He has taught me so much about parenting and about living.
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Today we came to a local festival near my parents' home in France. A maker's festival. Peep was invited to have a go at Blacksmithing - something he loves to do.
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He made a nail (un clou) and drew a huge crowd of smaller children who looked on with fascination. Then we looked at other stalls and finally relaxed in our favourite garden bar with sorbet and beer.
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Happy Birthday Peep!
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πŸ’žπŸ’žπŸ’ž

Married!
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Best wedding ever - such an awesome and magical weekend. Now listening to the hustle and bustle of Barcelona streets from our gorgeous hotel room!
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Discover more photos by searching #summitoflove2017
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Love Bea x

Me and my shadow.
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She's listening the church bells ringing on the other side of the park. We're sitting down together because my recent illnesses have led to weakness and tiredness. Rest is vital.
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Coco the Super Staffy has taught me so much about life, love, friendship and most definitely parenting.
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Currently she's teaching me all about our shared existence as Earthlings. Since the beginning of March I've transitioned to being a Vegan who happens to eat eggs (this autumn I will rescue some hens who are still healthy and laying but would otherwise be going to slaughter) so I can guarantee my eggs are happy and so are their Mamas.
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Life has been a huge swirl of inner and outer change recently. Today is two weeks before I marry my Darling - then we're off to Barcelona and the south of France.
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Can't wait!
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Happy weekend πŸ’žπŸ’žπŸ’žπŸ˜€

ON A TRAIN TO HULL
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Filming for a documentary today and also hopping onto BBC Radio 2 to chat to @ed_miliband about Punishment in schools.
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Here's the thing.
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Punishment fails our children whether at home or in school.
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Punishment (and reward) relies on fear. It uses the threat of discomfort to control behaviour. Rewards use the threat of missing out on pleasure to control behaviour.
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Fear-based choices about behaviour are not coming from a core place of principles. Principles such as respect, kindness, compassion, integrity, understanding etc. Instead they are extrinsically motivated.
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Extrinsic motivation runs out. It's why the stakes of discipline techniques have to be upped in order to continue controlling behaviour. Or rewards have to be made better for the same result.
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Every behaviour has a positive intention. Get to the bottom of that intention (empathy is a great tool) and you get to the bottom of the behaviour. From this place we can empower our kids to learn and choose different behaviours moving forwards. This is true in schools and in the home.
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Tune in to BBC Radio 2 today from 1.30pm to hear me live. .
If you want to change the way you parent so you no longer rely on a punishment and/or rewards system then get in touch. Links in my profile.
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Love Bea x
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#gentleparenting #attachmentparenting #peacefulparenting #familyliving #bringingbackthevillage #uniteinmotherhood #motherhoodthroughinstagram #motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodrising #dailyparenting #parenting #intentionalparenting #yesparenting #discoveringyes #raisingboys #raisinggirls #normalizegentleparenting #parentingcoach #beamarshall #parentingwithoutpunishment

No filter.
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That leaves of this colour exist in my garden and I do nothing to nurture the plant it's part of brings me so much joy!

SUNDAY MORNING GLAMOUR!
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I have a chamomile teabag compress up my nose to help my septum piercing heal! Fingers crossed, and based on advice from @owlandcatpiercing, this will help my septum heal the final stages so I can switch to a ring.
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The piercing was my 39th birthday present to myself back in March and I REALLY want to enjoy it properly!

THIS PHOTO IS SO MUCH MORE THAN 4 WORDS!
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Friday did me in. By the end of it I was so exhausted and depleted that it was safer for others to stay away from me. I had a rare moment of feeling defeated by single parentdom.
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Thank God for my incredible next-door neighbours. As soon as I heard them come home I went round and poured it all out and had a good cry. Being heard and drinking herbal tea gave me the resources I needed to tackle the mountain of washing up and cook a proper tea for me and the boys.
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At bedtime my boys had so much energy (it seems not to matter how much or little we've done in a day - bedtime is when the energy is guaranteed to come out of them) and I hung back (hid) in the bathroom.
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My Darling called me and I felt so much relief sharing the day with him. I shared about my need for consideration and acknowledgement and the challenges that brings when it's not my boys' responsibility to give those things to me (they are frequently considerate and appreciative for the record).
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Next thing I know, in comes Jos with this note in his mouth. My beautiful, probably ADHD and probably ASD, boy who normally doesn't notice I'm on the phone or in a conversation and talks straight over those things. He kneels before me and let's me read the note.
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I'm still in the bathroom sitting on the only loo in our home and I am flooded with feels at the level of consideration his note demonstrated.
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It amazes me that when I am struggling to find the Yes one of my boys will bring it at just the right time.
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One good sleep later and all the washing up done and my resources were back up to near normal. Plus I now know what I need to do differently to manage our Fridays!
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Say Yes to your children being exactly what you need even when you want to hide from them!
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Love Bea .
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#gentleparenting #attachmentparenting #peacefulparenting #familyliving #bringingbackthevillage #uniteinmotherhood #motherhoodthroughinstagram #motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodrising #dailyparenting #parenting #intentionalparenting #yesparenting #discoveringyes #raisingboys #raisinggirls #normalizegentleparenting #parentingcoach #beamarshall #parentingwithoutpunishment

MAKE YOUR VOTE COUNT.
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Today I will walk to the polling station with my boys and I will vote Labour. I am proud to vote for a party that is led by a man who has shown incredible strength and conviction in gentle and peaceful ways for the majority of my lifetime.
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@jeremy_corbynmp You are a legend and I believe in you.
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Whatever political ideologies you have (I am also convinced there are many better systems than the messed up one we have) your vote has power to make a difference. If you are a woman please remember the many women who died and were imprisoned fighting for their right to vote. If you are a human please think of the many around the world who do not have the democratic right we share. If you are a dog please bark until your owner puts an X in the box!
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We are voting for our children's future. We are voting for the elderly, sick, disabled, hungry, cold, homeless and lonely. We are voting for our teachers, doctors, nurses, carers, police officers, firemen and paramedics. We are voting for those born into a certain area of the country that makes it almost impossible to move out of poverty. We are voting for mental health, closing the inequality gap and opening up opportunities for education, peace and justice.
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Please vote. .
#votelabour
#forthemanynotthefew
#jeremycorbyn

PUPPY LOVE
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The wettest and windiest walk today with one of Peep's home ed gaming friends. Jos fell in love with their chiawawa (@kymhall how do you spell it???) cross jack russel and had him zipped up inside his cagoule.
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I felt at ease with the other Mum even though we'd never met properly before. Conversation flowed beautifully.
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Started my day with Ashtanga yoga and have also worked. Now cooking some spicy cauliflower with roasted red onions, tahini and orange dressing and sprouted black rice.
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Wedding prep this evening - chasing up RSVPs!

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