anaishollow anaishollow

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anaïs  don't look at me


missin you (n tony) #lilboosie

My sweet angel baby's room and belongings were destroyed last night by water damage and a collapsing ceiling. I have a link to a gofundme in my bio. Share this too if you'd like ❤️

I just can not


Thanks trauma! Also stop using me sharing how much pain I've been in to slide into my DMs!

here's an unrelated picture of me with one of my favorite people to just get some things off my chest. TW for abuse, assault, victim blaming, rape culture, and that god awful book "Conflict is not Abuse".
Coming forward about abuse is one of the hardest decisions survivors could ever make. As many people have seen at least once in their life, the survivor is usually demonized, lied about, ignored, hated, even assaulted and harassed further. People do not come forward about these things to tear apart communities or ruin anyone's lives. They do it to promote safety. Often survivors come to the conclusion their abusers won't or can't change. This reflects a larger systemic issue of where rape and assault come from: people, primarily and disproportionately, cis men's resistance to stopping perpetuating acts of violence underneath patriarchy. When survivors come forward, you believe them and you support them and you *listen*. The intention shared from many survivors is to *protect their communities moving forward*. With this said, any accountability modeled from discourse like that used in the book Conflict is not Abuse is harmful to survivors of more than just sexual violence. It is reductive and places way too much burden and emphasis on what survivors could have "done wrong." I agree that survivors can cause harm, but the focus and priority of accountability should never be taken off the perp. You should never go to the perp first. You should never shut out a survivor because they weren't perfect.

we went to new hope!

death to awkward hands, self doubt, paranoia, eating disorders, rapists, living with compounding trauma, internalized misogyny, liars, racists, transphobic scum, systemic oppression, false accountability and all the love to learning about how compassionate, resistant, and strong I am. I'm still here and living with a little less pain almost every day. Love to all the other survivors who have been shamed, silenced, distorted, etc. This world is hell but y'all are angels ❤️

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