Let it be known to all you young people... year 28 is when it all changes.
Getting out of the car after an hour drive hurts. You’ll go from a 28 year old traveling from point a to point b, to an 80 year old trying to get to your front door.
Sunglasses become like another appendage you never knew you needed. Forget them on a sunny day and feel your corneas burn out.
Your body begins to hurt when you wake up. Pulling a muscle or pinching a nerve can happen in your sleep.
Sleeping with your contacts in or studded earrings? Forget it. You’ll wake up numerous times throughout the night annoyed that you did both.
Hangovers happen with less alcohol and take longer to recover from.
Ability to drive at night: gone. Turning down the radio as if it’ll help you find your destination: real. I specifically remember making fun of my mom for this!
Going to bed by 9pm makes a world of difference if you usually stay up till 10pm or later to get some quiet “me” time while the kids are asleep.
Speaking of kids, if you have any by this time in your life, your house will never ever be clean ever again. Despite your hardest efforts, just give up. All your friends who don’t have kids yet will understand one day. And if they don’t, always try to hang out at their house so your kid can destroy a house other than your own for a few hours.
You’ll dig through 2 of your clean, unfolded laundry baskets looking for clean underwear only to find none. You’ll instantly become mad at your mom for not keeping up with your laundry, only to remember that you are now the mom, or wife, or fiancé, or significant other.
Buckle up young bucks.. if you think you have at least until your 30s, you wrong.