alex_elle alex_elle

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alexandra elle  author + poet || wife + mama @theheygirlpodcast book 3: neon soul (on sale now)

http://anothersunday.me/

Today I Affirm:
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I am responsible for doing the work in my healing.
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I am my own validation.
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I am abundantly full of all that I need.


homemade peppermint leaf paper from @marigoldmountain

I can't believe my sweet girl is going to 4th grade next month. It's also hard to fathom that I'll have a infant AND a 10 year old. I imagined my life as a mother much different than it is today. However, life has a way of humbling us and showing us beauty in the strangest ways. When I had Char, I was lost, 18, living in my world of self-loathing and emotional suffering. Not only that, I was unaware of myself and worth—along with having this intense need to get it together for her. It took a long time to figure myself out but, back then, motherhood slowed me down in a way that was much needed.
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While I do not advocate for teen pregnancy, in my case, my daughter was exactly what I needed to stop being selfish, miserable, and pitiful, and start doing better. It was the hard way. The rock bottom way. But after years of feeling shame about being a teen mom, it was up to me to change my narrative. Fast forward to 9 years later, I am here. Proud of myself for raising such a smart, kind, and mindful human being. She is my greatest teacher and the most compassionate person I know. Seeing her and my husband build a bond that is special and irreplaceable warms my heart. They are such wonderful people, and I am beyond excited for this new baby that's on the way to meet them both.
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Seeing Ryan as a first time (biological) father has me so excited. Being able to watch Char flourish in the role of big sister is something that I can't wait to see. My life, while not always ideal or put together, played out exactly how it should have. And I am nothing but honored and proud of my journey.
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#blendedfamily

I took this photo yesterday and it sparked today's journal question:
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even as your petals fall—how are you continuing to bloom?
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As you settle down for the evening, add this to your before bed journaling session and see what comes up for you. Wilting and blooming is a part of the journey, and sometimes it can leave us a little stuck when trying to figure out "what's next." Be patient w/ your growth cycle. Everything happens in seasons—honor your evolution.

a poem for my 16 year old self. #selflove

I recently had an experience with someone that completely stopped me in my tracks. Not only did the encounter leave me confused and emotionally drained—it also (almost) made me doubt who I know myself to be. My character, as well as my intentions, were attacked leaving me feeling as if I'd done something wrong. When in actuality the issue seemed to stem from not only a misunderstanding, but also a lack of open + clear communication. When things like this happen in our lives they're often teaching moments that we must pay attention to.
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After some reflecting, I came to the conclusion that I must not only send this person, their judgements, and unsavory interaction off with kindness (this can be SO HARD!), but additionally, I cannot allow someone else's presumptions reign over my life. I know who I am and how hard I've worked to get here. While it's disheartening to have someone try to dismantle your truth with their projections, standing tall in who you are is what the end result must be.
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I share this all to say, sometimes things shift when we least expect them. And often times we will never know why. Be okay with the ebbs and flows of relationships and life. Know who you are (always), protect your energy, and do not let outsiders rearrange what you've built emotionally.

This can be so difficult to do, I know. I had to remind myself of these words today. Everyone isn't going to be for us and vice versa. Carry this gentle reminder with you as you journey.
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excerpt from book 3: Neon Soul

my brokenness no longer speaks for my ability to feel whole and complete.

weekend mantra: my love of self is a ritual. it is sacred. i will honor it every step of the way. i will enjoy each moment of the journey. i will stand tall in my truth—even when there's no one around to acknowledge, witness, or co-sign. i am allowed to love myself—fully—without outside validation.
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excerpt from a poem in book 3: Neon Soul

ms. anita on for baby. kisses from daddy. both of us singing off key. great night. good times. a snippet of our joy.
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something stuck with me recently when i talked to fellow mama, @halfietruths. she said something along the lines of: don't hide your joyfulness. you're allowed to be proud. your testimony can give people hope. in regards to my pregnancy, there's a lot that i don't, won't, and haven't shared. even posting a piece of this sweet moment made me anxious. we're documenting everything and hoarding 99% of it. i got worried and thought, is this too personal? will other folks who are still TTC (trying to conceive) get sad by this? there's a lot of feelings and emotions that i have surrounding being pregnant—but the grandest feeling is being proud and happy. we have waited 2 long years for moments like these. for belly rubs + kisses. for family expansion + new life after loss.
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i hope whenever i share pieces of our intimate moments that they spark fullness, love, and hope in others. specifically the couples who are walking through their fertility journey. thank you, @halfietruths for encouraging me to dance and sing and be joyful in sharing pieces of my pregnancy, because initially i wasn't going to.
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don't let anyone or anything silence your joy. celebrate + share as you see fit.

love yourself. entirely.

page 63 of my third book: neon soul
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looking for more of my books?
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book 1: words from a wanderer (affirmations)
book 2: love in my language (poetry + narrative essays)

intentions for life.

Every single day is an opportunity to not only find your light, but to also walk in it. This past week has been slow, even slower than the rest. Lots of sleeping, writing, eating, and baby growing. The slowness has me feeling like I'm glowing, and I am enjoying it. My husband had to drag me out of the house yesterday for dinner and ice cream because I would literally lounge inside in my PJs ALL DAY if I could. I'm learning to embrace doing "nothing much" during this pregnancy—and I like it. Actually, I love it. Lately, when I chat with people they ask "so what's new?! what's going on?!" And other than me growing this baby, I say "nothing really." The look on their faces is often one of shock. That's probably because I'm always doing or working on something. But I've truly just been relaxing and honoring my body. I postponed my book tour + speaking engagements, I pressed pause on my skincare line, and I haven't taken on any new projects because: self-care and being present.
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When I wake up every morning I feel an immense flood of gratefulness that I'm able to take a step back and really dive into myself w/o worry or question. A lot people say when you're an entrepreneur you get no days off—but I changed that narrative for myself. I'm taking me time w/o shame or guilt or fear that I may be missing out.
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While I still plan on taking things slow, I'm finally ready to start easing back into work. So, for those wondering what's new, here are a few things:


-Season 2 of my podcast (@theheygirlpodcast) is out. Yesterday's episode w/ @halfietruths is super special to me, you can listen on iTunes.


-I'm picking up my @selfcaresessions w/ @wanderingwellness again. The next one we host will be in September in DC. Tickets are on sale now at the link in my bio.


-Me and @yogaracheal will be teaching in Portland, OR in October at @namasteonwilliams, and again in May of 2018 in NoCal at @1440Multiversity.
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Taking things slow is more than OK. Honor your time and yourself. We don't always have to be on the move. Show up for yourself, find your light, build your boundaries, and be present.

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