Normal _Sam ๐Ÿ˜Ž
thegermaine Nice little Greek alleyway for you. Not much to say about it really. Kinda boring but I quite like it. Sort of thing you see in a photo frame when you buy it just before screwing it up, throwing it away and placing in it, instead, a blurry photo of your dead dog. I'm glad to be back from holiday
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1d

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thegermaine I only posted this photo of Ian, David and Simon assembling my apps to prove that I have friends- you see? One whole message on the 'messages' icon ๏ธ๏ธ๏ธ I still haven't read it because it's making me feel wanted. I am pretty. I am pretty. I am pretty
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2d

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Normal _Sam ๐Ÿ˜Ž
thegermaine Hello there, fellow sky companion
Hmmm what do you want? You are just a cloud ๏ธ
Oh that's not very kind I was only being nice ๐Ÿ˜€
You are not in my league. You are a cloud. I am the sun ๏ธ
But I'm higher than you ๐Ÿ˜€
That is just a matter of opinion ๐Ÿ˜
Where you going, sun?? ๐Ÿ˜ฆ๐Ÿ˜ฆ
I'm setting. Goodbye
Come back, sun!! ๏ธ
Piss off CLOUD!!!!!!
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4d

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Normal _Sam ๐Ÿ˜Ž
thegermaine How about a bit of pretentious, Greek minimalism for you? Because I am in Greece. If I was going to be REALLY pretentious, I would write this caption in Greek. But I will just say 'pitta bread, please'. ๏ธ๏ธ๏ธ๏ธ๏ธ
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1w

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thegermaine Oooh Roger, now that IS a big one! It looks scary, I've never rode one as long as that! Darling, you'll be fine. Now, what about the rollercoaster? .
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2w

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Normal _Sam ๐Ÿ˜Ž
thegermaine Oh phew Panic over. I was starting to become psychotic
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2w

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thegermaine This pleases me. It pleases me so much I'd like to bathe in it. In fact I took it while I was in the bath. So I kinda did ๐Ÿ˜ŽYolo
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2w

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thegermaine This is what it's like when dwarves suffer an earthquake (no dwarf emoji, sadly)
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By the way, if you are a dwarf and are offended by my caption, then I am truly sorry that your arms are not quite wings
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3w

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Normal _Sam ๐Ÿ˜Ž
thegermaine Imagine if you cracked open a can of coke and there was a salmon in it. This thought is something that amuses me a lot. I was in Tesco a few weeks ago and I imagined opening a nice cold can of Coca-Cola expecting my thirst to be quenched and instead being disappointed to find a salmon staring up at me. I began laughing so much I went and stared at some minced beef while I calmed down so I didn't look weird
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3w
  •   george_can_create_it Woohoo! I love coming across an instagram user who likes to get silly. Breath of fresh air! 3w
  •   masmaster I love your gallery, especially your miniatures. It's fun and impressive! I actually thought that you used a tilt shift lens, but if I understand the comments correctly, you get this effect during editing. Nice editing work! 2w
  •   thegermaine @masmaster thanks very much! Although I do use telephoto lenses (18-200 and 24-105 canon 7D) but a lot of the filtering, etc is done in editing. Cheers! 2w
  •   catcee It all sounds a big fishy to me 2w
  •   worberb 2w
  •   sunemilysun Superb! 2w
  •   thegermaine @sunemilysun why thank you Emily 2w
  •   sunemilysun It is simply superb dear Sam! ๐Ÿ˜ฏ You are a genius ... 2w

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thegermaine I found a new sexy solo tree the other day, on the right is evidence of her skiing practice. She's quite accomplished Her name is Joanne the Ski Queen and her favourite bird is a cow
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3w

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thegermaine Excuse me! Yes! You there!
Have you seen my oars?! ๐Ÿšฃ
No? What does it look like? Is it a shire or a Shetland?
No!! My OARS!! ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿšฃ
I don't understand Why would you need a horse when you're rowing?? Surely you would need oars! ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿšฃ
That's what I said! I can't be captain of this fine vessel without oars! ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿšฃ
I see! Well what do they look like?? Are they OARange? OAR are they OARnaments?
Don't be ridiculous! I'm drowning here!
Oh, you can borrow my oar if you like but I only have one... ๐Ÿšฃ
Yes! Thank you!
Excuse me! Have you seen my oar???๐Ÿšฃ
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3w

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Normal _Sam ๐Ÿ˜Ž
thegermaine One of those photos usually followed by some lame caption such as 'Sunset Glow' or 'Golden Haze', so I shall entitle this photo: Sparrow Shit ๏ธ
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4w

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Normal _Sam ๐Ÿ˜Ž
thegermaine Oh crap. Whatever you do, don't tell your dad I've murdered your uncle Karl.๐Ÿ˜ถIt was only meant to be a slap round the face but then I remembered how he looked up my skirt at my coronation party.You just don't do that to a queen! Do you? Oh why am I asking you? You're deaf. A deaf little pawn. I hate you and now you have no uncle. See? You can't even hear me. Clean up this mess and hide the body in the castle, the bishop will take care of it. Never mind I'll do it
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4w

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thegermaine Phwoar. Dat ass doh
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4w

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Normal _Sam ๐Ÿ˜Ž
thegermaine Not even gonna lie. Just looking at this is making me horny .
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1mon

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thegermaine Erm, Stephen you don't seem to be doing much to help with this music serpent, get up off your knees or you can stay there and this won't be going in the phone
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1mon

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Normal _Sam ๐Ÿ˜Ž
thegermaine I recently took delivery of a MacBook Pro and saw that the default desktop was similar to this photo but nowhere near as good. So erm, just saying... Apple. Hello
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1mon

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Normal _Sam ๐Ÿ˜Ž
thegermaine Throwback Tuesday (real thing) to the days when I was a scarecrow. This one time a young lady called Dorothy came past, she told me she was on the way to Emerald City and would I like to go with her. I told her to stop being so childish and punched her in the tit
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1mon

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