delongpredannon I see all of those things above. @gnorkfairy@niksixsix@sully@c0c0bean@charlesbroccoli I see Nelson "Walmart" Whitaker. A once successful traveling salesman back in the mid 1800's. See, he traveled the country, from town to town, selling remedies to all of the lonely housewives of the miners and Wall Street executives. He had a plethora of goods ranging from home made moonshine (each batch usually involved in at least one explosion which either killed or maimed a family member. "That's why it tastes sooooooooo dang gone good", he says) to acai powder, green tea suppositories, hand crafted toilet paper and bacon salt. He eventually became the country's largest purveyor of all cheaply made goods and eventually met Samuel L Walton, a keen businessman with a silver tongue and a heart made of stone. The both met and battled relentlessly for 5 solid days. At the end, Mr Walton was the victor. He kneeled down to Mr. Whitaker and said, "You will never beat my low prices. EVER" and slapped him in the face. He eventually was captured by aliens and returned to earth in the 70's or 80's or something. I don't know what happened to him. (I make my own goods out of wood and stone) So anyway, that guy in your coffee mug is Nelson Whitaker right after he got the beating of his life and vowed to eventually best Mr. Walton. Of course, he never did because he invested all of his money into dot com businesses in the 90's. Remember that company that made talking toilet brushes? Me neither. Rest in peace Nelson Whitaker.
guy_agave I see Santa, but he's wearing a genie turban. Because that's what Santa is - a genie free from his bottle, and he's so flipping happy to be free that he goes around granting peoples' wishes. That's also why he's so smart, and why he's so fat- cos he didn't get to eat while in his bottle, so he's been binging for a long time. Hey, Santa! Clean up that beard, brother! You're looking a little Rastafarian. Oh, yes... I wish for a pair of leopard print velvet creepers in 9 4E width. That would be sweet! Like you, Santa! Ha ha! Keep flying, genie!